The Fiery Furnaces Complete Lyrics Archive

B i o g r a p h y
(by Official press)

The Fiery Furnaces are brother and sister Eleanor and Matt Friedberger (both on vocals and guitar, Matt on synth and organ). From late 2005, Matt and Eleanor are joined live by Jason Loewenstein (ex-Sebadoh) on bass and Bob D'Amico on drums. The two replaced drummer Andy Knowles and bass and synth player Toshi Yano who had been touring with the Furnaces since 2004. Siblings Eleanor and Matt were born and raised in Oak Park, IL, but relocated to New York to form the Fiery Furnaces. As children, the two weren't particularly close, a dynamic that shaped their shaky relationship over the future years. Before forming the Fiery Furnaces, Eleanor earned a University of Texas B.A and worked as a telemarketer for the Texas Republican Party. She followed this by travelling all over Europe where she spent a year in London before going to France, Italy and Greece with her Mom. Matt, on the other hand, went to Germany at 17, and managed to learn not a word of German or even have a good time – paradoxically longing for what he set out to run from in the first place. After dropping out from the University of Illinois at Urbana-Champaign, he moved back with his mother at 26.

After college and separate trips abroad Matt and Eleanor returned to their home in Oak Park and began working on music together. They mixed simple, poppy melodies with a dizzying array of wordplay, sounds, and influences, including the Who, Captain Beefheart, Os Mutantes; dashes of folk, blues, and garage rock; and Eleanor's adventures in Europe. In 2000, they both moved to Brooklyn, took day jobs, and began playing as the Fiery Furnaces late in the year. The Furnaces played their initial gigs at a small club called Enid's in NYC in November 2000 and branched out from there, going through several lineups of supporting musicians ranging from three-piece to five-piece as they played gigs with the French Kicks, Sleater-Kinney, and Spoon. A series of early appearances throughout NYC resulted in them being discovered by British underground label Rough Trade, which they signed up with in 2002 on the basis of their demo. By the time they signed to Rough Trade, their debut, Gallowsbird's Bark was completed and the Fiery Furnaces were already at work on the follow-up. Released in the fall of 2003, Gallowsbird's Bark garnered critical praise for its clever wordplay and original songwriting.

A show at the Astoria in London on August 14, 2003 supporting Sleater-Kinney is considered to be the band's first proper concert afetr being signed with Rough Trade. The band gained more momentum the following year, when praise for the debut album dovetailed with the release of the group's even more diverse and challenging sophomore album, Blueberry Boat, that summer. The Fiery Furnaces spent much of 2004 touring with Ted Leo & the Pharmacists, Franz Ferdinand, and the Shins, but already had plans for their third and fourth albums, including an album of duets with their grandmother and a set of beatnik-inspired songs. Early in 2005, the group released the simply-titled EP, a mini-album gathering most of their B-sides along with a few new songs. The "grandmother" album, titled Rehearsing My Choir and recorded with their 80-year old grandmother Olga Sarantos, was released in late 2005 and was met with mixed reviews - some called it a marvellous concept gem, others simply dubbed it a "senseless mess". April 2006 saw the release of the Fiery Furnaces' fourth studio album proper, a collection of "love songs to dance to" according to Matt, titled Bitter Tea, which Matt described as "sissy psychedelic satanism". The album was supposed to be released at the same time as Rehearsing My Choir, however, financial issues prevented Rough Trade, the band's label, from doing so. The label's US parent, Sanctuary, was forced to licence the US release of Bitter Tea to Fat Possum.

South Is Only a Home

Can I feel useless and low?
Could I hide a chain of gold from your eyes?
Sandy thinks he knows the trade
All the games and the plays
And the ways I make

Do you believe in the first way to lend a hand?
It's a second chance you never planned
Just a close encounter that comes to mind
A rummage sale you barely find

And it's sold
You better believe it's freezing cold
When it's sold
You better believe it's freezing cold

Oh Whitehall
Whitehall women rejoice
Tell us we're the ones with the most
And hear the sounds of our voices
We've been waiting for our host

Brixton bunnies come in
We can see the state you're in
Nothing like a smiling face
Oh what a waste you've been

Clapham clown stop your frowning
Let it go you're not alone
The river may keep you drowning
But south is only a home
South is only a home

I'm Gonna Run

I slit my wrist with my swing line
Copied myself five hundred times
I pierced my ears with a three-hole punch
Ate twelve dozen doughnuts for lunch

So next week I'm a walk
Next week I'm a walk
And the week after that I'm gonna run

I swam in an Olympic-sized pool
Had a picnic with a ventriloquist
Saw my brother coming up the hill
He wrapped a beach towel 'round my wrist

So next week I'm a walk
Next week I'm a walk
And the week after that I'm gonna run

I dumped Surel for an older man
Now I'm doing it for Dante
Gimme some of that nasty water
I'll take it one sip at a time

So next week I'm a walk
Next week I'm a walk
And the week after that I'm gonna run

So next week I'ma walk
Next week I'ma walk
And the week after that I'm gonna run
On one of those things
It's something like a treadmill I think

So next week I'm a walk
Next week I'm a walk
And the week after that I'm gonna run

I pulled my kerchief out of my pocket
Wiped my nose and said hello
I bought a tambourine at the millennium dome
It jangled two thousand times in a row

I caught a cold when I was way down south
Standing out in the heat
Now my eyes are all itchy
And I can't tell which way to walk down the street

I'm stumbling through the crosswalk
And I'm humming in the din
And when I get to the other side
I'm gonna jangle my tambourine again

I fished my microphone out of Regent's Canal
Heading from Little Venice to Greenwich
Dirty boy said let's make in love in the water
I said, No thanks, pal.

Went on dictating in my mic
I got no time for a dip cause I'm heading for my ship
I'm going down to the tunnel
Down to the leaky leaky tunnel

Up in the North

Wearing my scarf and my hat
And I squint and I sniff as I went around
Walked up the road through the woods
By the pines, by the lake as I heard the sound

Maria Anna Gamisou
Daughter of a dire in Oulu
Sang me a song or two
And I wrote them down

Up in the north, in the cold
In the ice, in the snow
She would cry and cry

There she would moan
She would whine
And the tears would pour down
And she would never

Angela Exema Milou
Servant girl in Turku
And I wrote them down

Down in the south, in the heat
In the sweat, in the rain
She would cry and cry

There she would moan, she would whine
And the tears would pour down
And she would never

Melissa Jarmon Dupres-oo!
Sitting on a bench in Anjou
Sang me a song or two
And I wrote them down

Elias Doxia Didou
Son of a bitch back in Turku
Sang me a song or two
And I wrote them down

Inca Rag/Name Game

In the cracker barrel dumpster I found a bag
Red white striped I opened it--gag
Mummy day pizarro dressed in a Inca rag
Call on in to work quick
Tell 'em that I'm seasick

Uncle Ricky's schooner's docked Pompano Beach
Weigh anchor and me and him each
Need some extra sunblock, do it for 'em he can't reach
San Juan by next Sunday
Mummy mummy mummy

Walking through the market, stop buy some rum and coke
Plantains please, my mummy man spoke
But you have to pay 'cause you know dude I'm broke
Sitting outside the sunset, are we in Cadiz yet

Over to Majorca for few audience fit
Juan Carlos, his throne he go sit
Throw the mummy in the dungeon bottomless pit
Appealing in the Hague say
Mummy mummy mummy

I was listening to a classic VH when I pulled an H. Singh
Drank myself into a stupor, ears started to ring
And I'll go finally Al's and type my brain away
With Pebbles and Ives we'll meet Madonna, Ladonna, Shadonna
And my brother with the very best name of all
And we'll go to finally Al's and type our brains away

Let's play bacci and horseshoes and croquet
But no, not cricket, 'cause I can't say their names
And I'll go to finally Al's and type my brains away

Penguin, Moe, Sal, Chris
Penguin, Moe, Sal, Chris

Asthma Attack

I would I had a asthma attack
If I seen the shark bite back
I would I had a asthma attack
If I seen the shark bite back

Yeah it's paradise island I know
Yeah yeah yeah I been there before
Once, twice, three times maybe
Once with my moms and twice with my baby

I shook my silver bracelet at a thousand sharks
They like the shimmer-glimmer but said
No never, no never swim in the dark
Once twice, three times maybe
Once with my moms and twice with my baby

I would I had a asthma attack
If I seen the shark bite back
I would I had a asthma attack
If I seen the shark bite back

Yeah yeah it's just a figure of speech
A python ate my babe when he hit the beach
Once twice, three times maybe
Once with my moms and twice with my baby

I shook my silver bracelet at a thousand sharks
They like the shimmer-glimmer but said
No never, no never swim in the dark
Once twice, three times maybe
Once with my moms and twice with my baby

Don't Dance Her Down

Don't dance her down boys
Don't dance her down
Don't dance her down boys
Her man's in town

I played cards in England
I threw dice in Spain
I'm going back to England
To play cards again

Don't dance her down boys
Don't dance her down
Don't dance her down boys
Her man's in town

My mom told me
A long time ago
To quit all my rowdy ways
And drink no more

Don't dance her down boys
Don't dance her down
Don't dance her down boys
Her man's in town

Crystal Clear

At Four o'Clock
Just after work
I got my check
I held my breath
The phone wrings tell them I ain't never here

The over under
Made a blunder
I gave my cell phone
To my cousin
He plays the threats I get to his friends at school

I board the dog
At Uncle Nicky's
I put my hood up
I have to run out
You welched the bet I'm soaking wet too close to an OTB

I took a train
Got off at Trenton
Bought a ticket
A bus to Vinton
Won't stop sweating till I get to Davenport

On the bridge
On the bus
Bye bye Moline
Look at the water
Filthy dirty cloudy muddy messy mucky crystal clear

I got my palm read
For seven fifty
She looked me over
I bought crystal
Filthy dirty cloudy muddy messy mucky crystal clear
Filthy dirty cloudy muddy messy mucky crystal clear

Two Fat Feet

Slip me out of my northern noose
My easter egg
My western wheel
And a snouthern snake

I've got a busted breast and a jiggly thigh
A rumpled roast and a raggedy eye
A floppy neck and two fat feet
Sneaky cheeks chewin' greasy gums

You got a wing in your snaggle tooth
And you can't knock it back with no eighty proof
You got a wing in your snaggle tooth
And you can't knock it back with no eighty proof

You got a wing in your snaggle tooth
And you can't knock it back with no eighty proof
Oh you got a wing in your snaggle tooth
And you can't knock it back with no eighty proof

Bow Wow

Down in the dumps
Me and the seagulls we were looking for lumps
They all get scared when off of one of the bumps: jumps

I have to clutch
I have to tell him his commands all in Dutch
He likes his treat but he don't like to touch much

I forget to fix his card
Down on Richmond Boulevard
Running through the yard keenly

High on the hills
They laid the sod thought they were full of the fills
Now when we're searching I swear all of the kills stills

Wrinkling his brow
He takes a sniff and drags me over there now
He looks all worried then he tells me a bow wow

I forget to fix his card
Down on Richmond Boulevard
Running through the yard keenly

Shade by the sheds
I drink a coke he digs a hole and he heads
Back where they came, where the trucks leave their treads, speds
Over the sift

He goes all round it past the end of his shift
I make him leave he lets me know he feels miffed: stiffed

I forget to fix my card
Down on Richmond Boulevard
Stumbling through the yard sleepy

Gale Blow

Gale, gale blow
Gale, gale blow
Oh my umbrella
Can't, can't take it you know

Been caught in a hail storm
A blizzard tornado's nose
Oh but nothing, no nothing
Can beat this gale blow

Worry Worry

Never let one man worry your little mind
Don't you never let one man worry your little mind
He'll keep you troubled troubled worried yeah
Worried all the time
He'll keep you troubled worried yeah
Worried all the time

Don't you wish your little boy was cute like mine
Well don't you wish your little boy was cute like mine
He's a married man but he comes to see me sometime
He's a married married man but he comes to see me sometime

Never let one man worry your little mind
Don't you never let one man worry your little mind
He'll keep you troubled troubled worried yeah
Worried all the time
He'll keep you troubled worried yeah
Worried all the time

Don't you wish your little boy was cute like mine
But don't you wish your little boy was cute like mine
He's a married man but he comes to see me sometime
He's a married married man but he comes to see me sometime

Never let one man worry your little mind
Don't you never let one man worry your little mind
He'll keep you troubled troubled worried yeah
Worried all the time
He'll keep you troubled worried yeah
Worried all the time

Don't you wish your little boy was cute like mine
Now don't you wish your little boy was cute like mine
He's a married man but he comes to see me sometime
He's a married married man but he comes to see me sometime

Bright Blue Tie

On my first day in town we saw the king
He was dressed in a suit with a bright blue tie
And it matched his eyes
And when ours met I sighed

Took a boat or a ferry to an island
There were gardens and trees and balloons in the sky
And we knew it was right

It wasn't only the light
Rode our bikes up and down the streets so wide
Don't lock 'em up no they'll be just fine
And I said Oh my, my
I can't believe it! I cried

This must be paradise
But it's not, no, no, no, no
But it's sweet, sweet, sweet, sweet, sweet, oh Sweden

Had a breakfast of cheese, yogurt too
All this fat but you're so skinny to boot
I said it's in my genes
Yeah we're so skinny we're mean

Took the train everyday from your suburb yeah right
Only ten minutes and we're south centre tonight
And we don't have to pay
We sneak in free everyday

Schnapps on the house at the bars you like
Your friends stand in line and practise English all night
And I like them, they're nice
All so blonde and precise

This must be paradise
Oh it's not, no, no, no, no
But it's sweet, sweet, sweet, sweet, sweet, oh Sweden

Tropical Ice-Land

Goat's head in the deli case
Oh sweet angel-angel-bearded face
Papier maché parade on at night
That's what you do with no sunlight

In the tropical tropical
Tropical ice-land
Tropical tropical
Tropical Ice Ice

Bleak church on a cold tundra
Mountain-glacier-glacier-glacier-stream
Black stone beach and a black death bottle
Is all me and my baby'll need

In the tropical tropical
Tropical ice-land
Tropical tropical
Tropical Ice Ice

Take intermission at the movies
Freeze outside for one quick smoke
Take a klondike bar from the pop machine
Hey it's ice cream, no not coke

In the tropical tropical
Tropical ice-land
Tropical tropical
Tropical Ice Ice

Let's meet in Kristiana next summer
Let's get out before we melt away
I've seen enough stray ponies and puffins
To get me through till the end of May

In the tropical tropical
Tropical ice-land
Tropical tropical
Tropical Ice Ice

Rub-Alcohol Blues

Troubles up and down the road
And trials all the way around
Never knew what trouble was
Till my honey threw me down

With nothing but old ragged clothes
My heartstrings broken to shreds
Blues creeping over my body
Queer notions flying in my head

The easiest thing I ever done
Was loving and drinking wine
The hardest thing I ever done
Was paying off a judge's fine

No I've never worked for pleasure
Peace on earth I cannot find
The only thing I surely own
Is a worried and troubled mind

If men and wine don't kill me
There's one more plan to find
Oh soak up all the old rub alcohol
Ease all trouble off my mind
Oh ease all trouble off my mind
My mind, my mind

We Got Back The Plague

That easy going man of blood
Mucking about in the McLennan County mud
If you're hoping he won't, well course then he must
Driving his truck through the McLennan County dust

I read in my book on Sunday afternoon
So it's easy to think the end's coming soon
But though sometimes the signs from heaven are vague
Early November we got back the plague

While beautiful Laura's sweeping the porch
He's teleconferencing up his operation torch
And I don't care if he bombs Babylon to hell
Except for he's building Babylon here as well

I read in my book on Sunday afternoon
So it's easy to think the end's coming soon
But though sometimes the signs from heaven are vague
Early November we got back the plague

Waking up in Cedar Rapids looking for allies
Praising his leaches and looking for likewise
Down in St. Charles local talent he hawks
Smirking and sowing the wind as he talks

I read in my book on Sunday afternoon
So it's easy to think the end's coming soon
But though sometimes the signs from heaven are vague
Early November we got back the plague

In Northern Virginia on their excursions
L.U.V. in with all their diversions
Horns for hounds & spurs for horses
Release the committed Seventy-Two hour task forces

I read in my book on Sunday afternoon
So it's easy to think the end's coming soon
But though sometimes the signs from heaven are vague
Early November we got back the plague

Bentonville and Dalas with gasoline douse
Then back to Crawford going over to the firehouse
Behind the curtains not turning much of a trick
Sicking ourselves to make ourselves sick

I read in my book on Sunday afternoon
So it's easy to think the end's coming soon
But though sometimes the signs from heaven are vague
Early November we got back the plague

That easy going man of blood
Mucking out in the McLelland County mud
If you're hoping he won't well course then he must
Digging us down under the McLellan County dust

Blueberry Boat

Quay Cur

I had a locket
A little silver charm
Given to me so to keep me out of harm
Canvasing the quay side trying to earn my keep
A killick tore it off my neck and threw it in the deep

And now I'll never, never, never feel like I am safe again
And now I'll never, never, never feel like I am safe again
And now I'll never, never, never feel like I am safe again

Up to the quarantine, late night aboard
Try to raise our fees but we get what they afford
Busy work below deck according to form
Waiting for the clear to leave but then comes up a storm

We hid beneath the barrels of blubber hoping that the rain had passed
But when the wind kept up the rats cut down the rigging off the mast
And then the rust chewed through the anchor chain and out to sea we're cast

The clouds dried and cracked
It was calm and in fact
The ship had been towed
By sea Dyaks towed

So we're sold Kolaba
And sent, I let out a sob
A cry oh no it's disaster
T-Ranter Bay Madagascar.

Great gulps of Greek fire get us in
Sling sticks at the stockade Fort Dauphin
A guardsman gave a griffin said grease my duke
Down by the chimney and out through the fluke

A looby, a lordant, a lagerhead, lozel
A lungio lathback made me a proposal
Straight sail, top mast, astrolabe prospected
Down in his dry dock erected infected

Mocked up with silk strings and taffeta tricked
With nails out of driftwood already iron sicked
Now spy out the glass at whatever missteps me
Aand the press gang warrant's signed Sir Edward Pepsi

Course it wasn't long till I caught the croup
Dawding on the drizzy deck of my majesty's sloop
If only the helmsman would turn from his whip staff
With my azimuth compass I'd go by the hectograph

Up to the whaling fleet in Gilbert sound
Then back in the hull when we come around
With one hundred seals and two polar bears
Nearly in the harbor without any cares

But then
A looby, a lordant, a lagerhead, lozel
A lungio lathback made me a proposal
Straight sail, top mast, astrolabe prospected
Down in his dry dock erected infected

Mocked up with silk strings and taffeta tricked
With nails out of driftwood already iron sicked
Now spy out the glass at whatever missteps me
And the press gang warrant's signed Sir Edward Pepsi

And now we live by muskles, water weeds with small relief in store
And all the sick men in the Galean were then put upon the shore
And on the twenty second we didn't see our general any more.

Down came our trestle-trees, no pitch tar or nails
Fore shrouds break no rope we trust
Only shift of sails

Drink my Rosa Solis, struck suddenly ahull
Yield ourselves we spoomed, my sinews stiff
My eyes were dull

Straight Street

Tea time at Damascus computer cafe,
I'm looking busy and staring off the other way
Leverkusen, Juventus; Leeds vs. Valencia
I'm over-hearing all their nonsense in extensia

They're talking too tough for me to inspect
So I have a smell who seems the best to connect
I pick my clique and set to go to work
But the only thing they care about is to whom to play the Turk

So I walked up the length
Of the street they call Straight
Cursing myself
'Cause I got there too late

I traded an expired credit card for two cupfulls of water
They had a dirty beany baby so for good luck I bought her
I rented a Hyundai with two flats and no windshield
No speedometer and a handbrake that squealed

When the sun came up I couldn't put down the visor
So I put on my hat and a question to my local advisor
Whose trucks are those that parked up by the town
But he only would mumble with his eyes pointed down

So I walked up the length
Of the street they call Straight
Cursing myself
'Cause I got there too late

My boss the head of sales for Western Asia
Said you'll get fired if your opposite from Nokia plays ya
If he beats you for the battle of hearts and minds
Tells 'em we use pig by-products in our designs

So when I saw my rival's smile didn't get diminished
No one had to tell me I knew that we were Finnished
You boys from Ericsson better get in the back seat
'Cause your phones are getting stoned over on that straight street

So I walked up the length
Of the street they call Straight
Cursing myself
'Cause I got there too late

So I went to Georgia looking at spas and convents
Tried to make myself the broker for selling off the contents.
At the big change clinic my friends said don't be a cynic
You should work in Baku this is watcha gotta do.

Call a contact in Texas talk to 'em in their Lexus
On their hands-free device and don't be too nice.
But in my teleconference with Houston
They told me I wasn't any use to 'em.

So I walked up the length
Of the street they call Straight
Cursing myself
'Cause I got there too late

Tea time at Damascus computer cafe
I'm looking busy and staring off the other way
Arsenal, Inter; Madrid vs. Valencia
I'm over-hearing all their nonsense in extensia

They're talking too tough for me to inspect
So I have a smell who seems the best to connect
I pick my clique and set to go to work
But the only thing they care about is to whom to play the Turk

So I walked up the length
Of the street they call Straight
Cursing myself
'Cause I got there too late

Pontoon put-put with the tape on ten
Dixie cup pink wine in the Labor Day sunshine
I'm sliding the sunfish up through the wakes
Coming up too quick, making mistakes

Quiet climb the chrome ladder in the front
While they're all yawning, under the awning
Astro turf green hot to the touch
Sneak open the cooler, they've got too much

Past Taipei, through the Taiwan straits
We sailed on in, me and my mates
It was my first time running my own ship
But my buddies didn't care they didn't give me no lip
So many times we've been side by side
But I never carried a load with so much pride

You see I'm from Grand Rapids and up my way
We grow the best blueberries in the U.S. of A.
And when we pull into old H.K.
The little markets'll have something special next day

At dawn I had a scotch and made them switch off the porn
'Cause there's nothing that's dirty about the ocean in the morn

The radar said nothing and nothing crossed my mind
When they came starboard side up from behind

Down below deck sip the south island sec
Think when last put in port, I was sorting the sort
And then a girl caught my eye, as she was waving goodbye
Tell me my dear, I said warm and sincere, who do you know on the ship
And then she curled up her lip
I don't know no one there yet, but just wait, see what you get

Pop the top and drink your drop we'll never go home
Curse and cry and why oh why we'll never go home
We'll never go home

The radar said nothing and nothing crossed my mind
When they came starboard side up from behind
I never saw them coming even though it was light
They beat two of my men simply out of spite

And then they came back to the helm, kicked me over and said
Do what we say or we'll kill you and your men
I looked back at those pirates with their beady little eyes
I gathered my courage and I could see their surprise
When I said, Go ahead you could cut my throat
But you ain't never getting the cargo of my blueberry boat

It's sad and it's cold at the bottom of the sea
But at least I got my blueberries with me

Later at lunch with the taco lettuce crunch crunch
She sets herself apart the bunch
How bad does she seem
She makes me wanna scream

On the phone with the West Glen Ellen rest home
Talking up a tattle tome
How bad does she seem
She makes me wanna scream

My mom is gonna babysit tonight
Did you hear Melinda got into a fight
You whore you bitch, she said, well then it serves her right

Talking all mad you know she really isn't being sad
Her baby daddy's name is Tad
How bad does she seem
She makes me wanna scream

Well yesterday you know she didn't none of that to say
She queen-bee turned and walked away
How bad does she seem
She makes me wanna scream

Then boyfriend calls her up on the other line
She tells him sweetie sweetie sweetie mine
but he spaces out and thinks to himself all the time

My baby's got a stick stuck out her beak
My baby takes a drink out of the leak
My baby's got a blue-green sweater
And a nest down by the creek
Plume bloom bloom blaby bloom
Cheep cheep beep bee-bee beep

Where did you for lunchtime go
Did Kevin and Jenny show
Do you wanna go out tonight
No
Plume bloom bloom blaby bloom
Cheep cheep beep bee-bee beep

Remember that girl down the end
She was my friend
But just now she's angry came up
And said You're so so stup'
It's all disrup'
You're blah blah, this this ,that so now sh'up
You messed it up.

Remember that girlfriend of Al's
Well we were pals
Today she was angry came up
And said You're so so stup'
It's all disrup'
You're blah blah this this that so now sh'up
You messed me up

Then Tony of the Franklin Park hockey club
Went to Gunzo's and bought a goalie glove.
Jessica was ‘posed to meet him back on Mannheim
Kitchen back door by all the grease and grime

Was a little bird at my window
Said that he's been messing round
He's working up the courage so to leave you
He's getting ready to say he doesn't love you

Well Tony took it all in stride
Said don't be silly but wondered who had spied
Jessica was driving down Wolf Road
Roll up the windows, baby, talk in code

I'm the little bird at your back door
Said your true love's let you down
I'm the little bird through your chimney
Said he's been running round
He's working up the courage so to leave you
He's getting ready to say he don't love you

Then she bumped into purses stole a credit card
Writing Chris Michaels, no it wasn't hard
Number five terminal with a yogurt cup
Reading a young miss as she slurps it up
Nasty message when he don't pick up

Layover Aden watch the local news
99 and humid, oh the Red Sea blues
Landing at Delhi take a third class train
Umbrella vendor in the autumn rain
Then the cops come by and ask your name

With his chillum and chillum-chee
The cazee sentences me
So now go where you're supposed to be
And give up your Devi Desi

I's paraded on through the choke
When my leg irons broke
And my bicycle wheel spoke
The Bombay army's no joke

On the top of an Aracan Dam
Started our picnic then Bam
My Devi ‘n me had to scram
Quick down to Madras a'lamb

Thought as a tindal that I could blend
As I got to pretend
From laziness, the gang defend
pick up your pick axe and rend

Fasten your seatbelt and take hold of my arm
That's what she said before setting off my alarm
Baby gotta go baby gotta go

I know
She's gonna go
I know
She's gonna go

Down in Columbo girl whatever you want
But the surf and cobras, tigers all taunt
Baby gotta go baby gotta go

I know
She's gonna go
I know
She's gonna go

Paw Paw Tree

At last when the choice was neither/nor
Bottom of the bay we're set ashore
Went into town beg what we lack
Two hundred stripes on horseback

Wearing my yellow coat
Rope tied around my throat
Great green wax candle unlit
Silence! And then the sentence spit

I'm sitting up in my paw paw tree
Wait they make mango mush out of me

Pick axe I can't stay
Silver mines all day
Cut down the weedwood
And think that I just could

I'm sitting up in my paw paw tree
Wait they make mango mush out of me

Tied down with brown twine
Up past the tree line
Up by I hope where
The King of Spain don't care

I'm sitting up in my paw paw tree
Wait they make mango mush out of me

I kicked my dog
I was mean to him before
I guess that's why he walked out my door
I really wish I could see him some more

I looked under the mats and I asked all the cats
I went to the vet have you heard anything yet
My dog was lost but now he's found
My dog was lost but now he's found

I went to the bar and they said not so far
I went to the gym have you taken a walk with him
My dog was lost but now he's found
My dog was lost but now he's found

I went to the run but they were having too much fun
I put up a flyer and gossiped the town cryer
My dog was lost but now he's found
My dog was lost but now he's found

I stood on the corner and called up the coroner
I emailed the station and told ‘em my location
My dog was lost but now he's found
My dog was lost but now he's found

I went to the DQ cause I thought I might see you
I went to the Super K have you seen any recent stray
My dog was lost but now he's found
My dog was lost but now he's found

I went down to the market where tied up you used to bark at
Went where you got adopted felt so bad I nearly dropped dead
My dog was lost but now he's found
My dog was lost but now he's found

I put a mortgage on my lease and went to the police
I bribed my way on the system cause I really, really missed him
My dog was lost but now he's found
My dog was lost but now he's found

I finally went to ground gave some pence to the pound
I finally went to ground gave some pence to the pound
My dog was lost but now he's found
My dog was lost but now he's found

I went to the church that Wednesday night
The guest preacher said I bark but I don't bite
I saw my dog, but he'd seen the light
My dog was lost but now he's found

Mason City

Came a card marked Mason City
From my forwarder
Shut the door, don't let my dad see
Read aloud, Dear sir

Understanding you account an upright gentlemen
Aetna Life agreed and lent
By the way, my fee is two point six percent

Write again the Riceville widow
S-A-S-E
I would guess they'll be turned out though
I'll still make my plea

If the Dunlay heirs cannot be seen to care
Then the Banker's Trust will surely think it fair
To not give extensions, as they musn't dare

Write Des Moines on several matters
And I near anoint
Ladle thick the pleasant flatters
And then comes the point

Mr. Nelson wouldn't like to hear it said
As he's too proud, so I do it in his stead
He shall need an extension, so it read

Take the Oregon Short Line to Salt Lake
Take the Pere Marquette, take the Michigan Central
To West Madison for Christ's sake
Forgemen, Molders, Blacksmiths, Boilermakers
None on the make
Up for shade on Crumb Hill
Get something to make my hands still
But now, wait

How are you my nabs
Little tender footed crabs
Meet my knuckle duster

You geeched that gazoon's gow
Tried to break into the bow
Go wipe your nose

I'm just hanging out with some noler knockums
Just passing time waiting till my stack comes

Prussian who got jackered
My snapper till your knockered
Get on the snam

The chivman wants your chip
Better dummy up then go dip
You're out of turn

I learned that the lowest form of life is the buffer nabber
Even worse than the dicer stabber

I wanted to be a typewriter mender when I grew up
But things didn't work out so, sleep
Late in the morning, climb up Mt. Olympia and replace a Return
But I didn't get enough good grades
My uncle Peter had the Parthenon Business Machine Remediation outfit
And right there, on the shop floor
Hundreds of electric-selectrics, all messed up
But I didn't get enough good grades

I had a dexadrine hyperactivity selective
Attend to relevant
Information tempo taken in told to
Mechanism coping concept
Put my head down crumple my paper

Sent to look at the future-job folder-binders
I got distracted by the graphs
In the resource room Mrs. Petorsky re-enforced me
Raisins from her zip-lock bag
And free time after my target behavior I was positive about
Tickets, tangibles, chips and stars
Now playing I'm In My Own Little House
Tickets, tangibles, chips and stars

I had a dexadrine hyperactivity selective
Attend to relevant
Information tempo taken in told to
Mechanism coping concept
Put my head down crumple my paper

After school I was sitting in the sitting room
Looking out at the pavers in their bright orange vests
Holding up the slow-go diamond plastic piece of wood
And I knew that I'd never be any good
And never wear a hard-hat and do things like that
So I joined the police force

Damp in Dumbarton dip about the fourteen of May
The publican dropped me a line thought there had been foul play
The farmer up the hill came in with his knife
He mumbled something darkly about his young wife

Riding up on the postcoach I thrummed on my notebook
The wind was up, I held on my hat. I do up my coat, look
The farmer stumbled past holding his gun
He mumbled something darkly about his young son

About your wife, sir
What about her
Pray, where is she
Nowhere you'll see

Locked him up in the store room of Mrs. McVeigh's Inn
Take tea up in the manor Sir Robert Grayson
The farmer through the window came in with his sword
He mumbled out of breath, forgive me my Lord

And after that rustic imposition I took a deposition
I shared a Woodpecker cider with a local fratricider
Who told me all this stuff and more

Well I rode up to Springfield on my motorcycle
And I's gonna stay with my younger brother Michael
Mom's oxycontoins and the Amstel Light
But I noticed I was doing most of the talking that night

So I got both remotes and turned off the DVD
And said Michael is there something that you need to say to me
Well I don't know how to tell you
You can tell me anything that you want ‘cept I started seeing Jenny

I started seeing Jenny
My Jenny
And he looked down at the floor
You know damn well she ain't your Jenny no more

And I said, Get her on the phone
Don't you think it's a little late
No, I don't think it's a little late
But I went out the room cause I knew I'd better wait

So I went down to her dad's bakery and she said
I'm gonna go outside take a break smoke a cigarette
I'm still surprised at how mad you get
Well what'd you expect
That you wouldn't try to wreck your little brother's happiness

And I said, Listen to you
I know what you're trying to do
And what whould that be
Mess with Michael's head as some kind of revenge back at me

So I drove up to Springfield in my wife's new car
And went and had a drink at my buddy's old bar

Spaniolated

I was eighteen years old, just a research volunteer
I walked home from the TCBY each night with no fear
One particular starry eleven o'clock, I went down by the water
An old man with a burlap bag said, How you doin' my daughter

He put me the hole of his old rusty crawler
And fed me three pills a day to keep me from getting taller
Learned me the rosary and made me pray to Santiago
I wish I wish I was back in Chicago

Up the river to Seville I was rowing and strumming
On my portable guitar my fair lady a humming
The pain, the pain, in Spain falls mainly on me
The pain, the pain, in Spain falls mainly on me

1917

Going down Morgan with Janko, Jerko, and Jerry
We downed our Pils, and over at the South Shore, they sipped their sherry
I opened my Kaiserized speller to learn what they know
Nurse killers, annexers-executioners, waouh!

Hey Slavonians, be ye mindful
That our ‘tis tongue dies never
The happy Hun Felsch sure likes his blond beer
And I like his doubles so much I might even cheer

Last year he had enough and got fixed on the cardinal
Who'd pardon all
The riff-raff and all their sinister ways and halfs and he laughs
Over on fifty-sixth, and he's got the arsenic on his left White Sock
And he sees the chicken stock in a big black pot
And he pours in the lot, but what ruined or saved the day
Was that the soup then turned gray, and a hundred higher-ups came
Back safe from the hospital to keep getting wafers from Mundelein
But now the Gigantics are getting the tar taken out of their pine
By my hero Red Faber and I'm ready to get rapprochement with my neighbor
As part of the healthy back and forth
But not if he's from up north.

So I ask Dad, Why can't we ever win, ever win, once
Go ask Dad, why you can't ever win, ever win, once

Birdie Brain

I hate the steam train that whistles woozy my bird brain
That sends my spaniel insane

And I'll stop riding sidesaddle if they don't stop the clickity clattle
I'll jump in the undertow penguin paddle and drown in my wedding gown

I've been told the Bronx River stream on moonlit nights is meant
To seem like the Rhone in a glacier icy dream but then in a poof t's sulfur steam

I hate the aeroplane that nearly misses my birdie brain
That terrifies my terrier insane

And I'll stop riding sidesaddle if they don't stop the clickity clattle
I'll jump in the undertow penguin paddle and drown in my wedding gown

I was drinking by the Des Plaines River when the naught of night
Served for making me shiver and me the squirrels would hold hands
And quiver cause that damnable diesel never fails to deliver

I hate the livery cars that have my bird brain seeing stars
That drive my Doberman to drink in bars

And I'll stop riding side saddle if they don't stop the clickity clattle
I'll jump in the undertow penguin paddle and drown in my wedding gown

I hate the steam train that whistles woozy my bird brain
That sends my spaniel insane

And I'll stop riding side saddle if they don't stop the clickity clattle
I'll jump in the undertow penguin paddle and drown in my dressing gown

Turning Round

Catamaran Man
You're my cousin
You're my blood
You're ten feet tall

And tan from the sun
After sailing all day
You sleep in your car

Throw the cushions on the floor
And listen to the sweet sweet dub

Roll a fag just for fun
And dream of the waves
And your sails turning round

Wolf Notes

Pick up your trumpet
Your plastic pretend trumpet
Blow me your horn today

Pick up your tambourine
Your Fisher Price my first tambourine
Jingle and jangle today

Plug in your keyboard
Your symphonic sound samba Samsung
Pick out a tune today

Turn off your radio
Shut away your stereo
Put away your disc-man
And play me a tune today

I rub the peg-paste and the chalk in
Scrape and the wolf-notes start to grrr
I did a donkey's back with fixed frog
And I martellato the slur

Through an open wound you watch the guts go
Cut cross the cat line, thick and thin
All overspun and resigned-up a slow stick trills me, trills me
She varnished all around her F-holes
Blue tape take aim, but the arms are too low
Legato look and sawing detache
But you want to bust your bow

Bow down and wipe off, snap the case closed
Madame Professor says "Well done"
But an electric stroboscopic frequency meter'd say otherwise

I scratch harmonicas in half-position
I pinch my e-string rat-a-tat
I double stop on any open string
Screw my G on up to B-flat

EP

Single Again

I married a man, oh then
I married a man, oh then
I married a man
He was the plague of my life
Oh and I wish I was single again

I wish I was single again
'Cause when I was single my pockets did jingle
And I wish I was single again

And then he beat me he banged me, oh then
He beat me he banged me, oh then
He beat me he banged me
He swore he would hang me
And I wish I was single again

He went for the rope, oh then
He went for the rope, oh then
He went for the rope
And I think think I was broke
And then I wish I was single again

I wish I was single again
'Cause when I was single my pockets did jingle
And I wish I was single again

And then my husband he died, oh then
My husband he died, oh then
My husband he died
And I laughed 'til I cried
Oh, to think I was single again

I married another, oh then
I married another, oh then
I married another
He's the devils grandfather
Oh, I wish I was single again

I wish I was single again
'Cause when I was single my pockets did jingle
And I wish I was single again

And then he beat me he banged me, oh then
He beat me he banged me, oh then
He beat me he banged me
He swore he would hang me
And I wish I was single again

Here Comes the Summer

Last day in May the afternoon
Remember
Black marks of charcoal from the dune
Remember
I thought it wouldn't be too soon
We'll wait at least until it's June

The twenty-ninth of March it rained
Remember
You'd look so sad that I explain
Remember
You knew it wouldn't be too soon
We'll have to wait until it's June

I've been waiting since I don't know when
And now it finally seems about to start
I swear I swear that I will do my part

December dark at six o'clock
Remember
The freezing wind gives you a shock
Remember
You knew it wouldn't be too soon
We'll have to wait until it's June

October damp on down the street
Remember
The sodden leaves stuck to your feet
Remember
You knew it wouldn't be too soon
We'll have to wait until it's June

I've been waiting since I don't know when
And now it finally seems about to start
I swear I swear that I will do my part

July the third we stayed up late
Remember
And thought how long we'd have to wait
Remember
It'll be so long until it's soon
It'll be so long until it's June

Evergreen

I was wielding my axe
Drank whiskey at the bar
Every night coming home
Out the windshield of my car
I would look through my boughs
And think I saw my lucky star

I was spreading my sheets
Took dinner all alone
Every night of the week
Awaiting for the phone
And I'd dab off my tears
With my favourite pinecone

Needle prick my spruce root
Dear little hemlock shoot
Make me stay sharp and keen, evergreen

I would tend to my bees
Sell honey on the road
Every fall in the wet
Watching lorries take their load
And I'd get all my winnings
Ask for special sap in code

In August for three weeks
I'm back in the village where I clip
All sorts of brambles and thorns
From up the hill I pip
In a little clay cup
I cross myself and sip

Needle prick my spruce root
Dear little hemlock shoot
Make me stay sharp and keen, evergreen

I was casting my line
Angling way the day
The stream was swift it was clear
But the light was getting grey
I bent down by the thistle
And thought of what it was I'd say

Needle prick my spruce root
Dear little hemlock shoot
Make me stay sharp and keen, evergreen

Sing For Me

Sing for me, my daughter, sing for me
When I'm away you'll be the siren that will finally lead me home
The girl around her father throws her arms to make him stay
"My daddy dear it hails, it blows; you cannot go today!"

Sing for me, my daughter, sing for me
When I'm away you'll be the siren that will finally lead me home

The April mud was on his boots, a' clinging through the fields
And desperate it send up its shoots-but at water's edge it yields

Sing for me, my daughter, sing for me
When I'm away you'll be the siren that will finally lead me home

The waves were pounding the dock, the pillars creak and growl
The shoreman loading up the stock, the gulls were crying foul

Sing for me, my daughter, sing for me
When I'm away you'll be the siren that will finally lead me home

The father called up to the ship, "You need an extra hand?"
"Ah yes, for just a little trip: one month be back at land,"
The rain had stirred the sea too well; the salt poured on the deck
At last the captain rang the bell: they ship was left to wreck

Sing for me, my daughter, sing for me
When I'm away you'll be the siren that will finally lead me home

It's calm but now the fog if thick: so which way should they head
The rest knew not and they must be quick-so father softly said

Sing for me, my daughter, sing for me
When I'm away you'll be the siren that will finally lead me home

Tropical Ice-Land

Goat's head in the deli case
Oh sweet angel angel bearded face
Papier maché parade on at night
That's what you're doing with no sunlight

In the tropical tropical
Tropical ice-land
Tropical tropical
Tropical Icy Icy

Bleak church on a cold tundra
Mountain-glacier-glacier-glacier-stream
Black stone beach and a black death bottle
Is all me and my baby'll need

In the tropical tropical
Tropical ice-land
Tropical tropical
Tropical Icy Icy

Take intermission at the movies
Freeze outside for one quick smoke
Take a klondike bar from the pop machine
Hey it's ice cream, no not coke

In the tropical tropical
Tropical ice-land
Tropical tropical
Tropical Icy Icy

Let's meet in Kristiana next summer
Let's get out before we melt away
I've seen enough stray ponies and puffins
To get me through till the end of May

In the tropical tropical
Tropical ice-land
Tropical tropical
Tropical Icy Icy

And if you ever need some hash or weed (backward)
You won't be gettin' it here
Just take a boat across the bumpy sea
Go to Denmark, man, oh it's so near (backward)

In the tropical tropical
Tropical ice-land
Tropical tropical
Tropical Icy Icy

Duffer St. George

In the back of a mini cab
Me and Georgie and Nigel and Sadie
"Can I use your mobile
Can I use your mobile, Sadie?"
On our way to Shoreditch
Off to Fabric in Shoreditch

Duffer St. George and I don't care
Duffer St. George and I don't care

On a Spitalfields Sunday
Get a two pound curry and roll ups
Get a 12p bagel and a camouflage T-shirt and bracelets
"Let me check the stalls first"
Nige wants a pint first

Duffer St. George and I don't care
Duffer St. George and I don't care

Smelling Cigarettes

Very much vodka and too much tequila
Those are the ways I learned to deal
Across against the light
And the sleet scalds my sight
Stunned I stayed put and a billboard truck runs over my foot

So things are really hopping
And my unemployment's stopping
And my kitty cat's copping
And I need to forget
So I go to the window and smell a cigarette

Now I'm in the clutches of my crutches
I'm laid up, and I sip from my cup
And I look outside
And I see Christopher Hyde
Who just got divorced
And there's a restraining order enforced
Going in his ex-wife's garage
I'm just drunk enough to open the window, yell out gruff

"Don't you key that brand-new Camry."
And he gave me the cursor
"Damn," returning to the spot he was
"Mind your own business you!"
And I wag my finger
"You're not doing what you're supposed to do."

And then he's coming toward me
And I took a swig of my tequila ‘cause it made me feel a little nervous
As he started across against the light
But he didn't look to his right as he didn't stay put
And a billboard truck came and ran over his foot

And the cops responding called out to me
"Hey is this your cat?"
"Yeah, but sometimes it forgets
Ah, wait a minute
I"m gonna come out there and smell a couple a cigarettes."

Don't you hurry worry with me
Don't you hurry worry with me
Don't you hurry worry with me
I'm gonna pack up your eyes with sand

If you tell me that again
If you tell me that again
If you tell me that again
I'm gonna pack up your eyes with sand

If you tell me you've been broke
If you tell me you've been broke
If you tell me you've been broke
I'm gonna pack up your eyes with sand

If you tell me that again
If you tell me that again
If you tell me that again
I'm gonna pack up your eyes with sand

Don't you hurry worry with me
Don't you hurry worry with me
Don't you hurry worry with me
Don't you hurry worry with me

I'm gonna pack up your eyes with sand
I'm gonna pack up your eyes with sand
I'm gonna pack up your eyes with sand
You better close your eyes
'Cause I'm about to pack'em up with sand

Cousin Chris

Back the bus he cussed "Space suits! Blackened boots
Lad, little Lad," he sad, "I've a tip for you
See, what about me, what about her, what about me"

For five dollars I walked him to his Mom's
And on the threshold he said straight and calm,
"See what about me, what about her, what about me"

Can't kiss cousin Chris could knight, turn off the light
With what why's we wave. What wish, it came true
See, what about me, what about her, what about me

One, two, three, four

T'ord ta tippy top Tommy tongue-tied talked
Tricked Trish tra trance which church chit-chat
Nana nots no know, so down the firehouse we go

Fireman Frank friendly fed fee-free
Dank dusty doughnuts den da dribble drank
Driven droopy drunken
In Clinton lake we've sunk in

So Tommy, look here what you did
Barnacle Bill's bound bonus bid

My mommy must a made up my mind
Many months me for Mandy Miller resigned
Right raise rank rise rust
And how she ever fussed
About that out-lout doubt-route scout
Seems he liked someone better than her
Oh Tommy, Trish and Frank
You can talk me to the bank
So I can bring a little extra today
Prop prince prize proof prize-proof, pry pray

When the word of your ward was the sword by your side
And you dug up the deed in the dump where he died
You seemed beside yourself; you're wandering all your wealth
‘While the warp and the woof of your words were worked
By perpetually pushing spirits and beers
Cause the coffin the cradle the curse
Were woven even worse

Since the ‘sary sends signs out the fire to whom it may concern
Cause the coffin is for me cause I have nothing to do with it
And the cradle is for me cause the old dragon attacked me in it
And the purse is for me because I don't have money nor friends

Sweet Spots

Well I stuffed my stuff into a sport sac and I took the Lake St. El
Well I got off Cicero and I snuck in through one of the loading docks

And I smiled as I sucked my gem I mean to take a room at the Brack's
Well I put things into the pockets of my parachute pants and I walked on up the street

Now Galewood makes me nervous but the corn syrup cloud's such a lure
So I'm staying off to the side at this end of the M&M Mars tour

Well I bought a bike but the chair broke right outside of Parky's
Well the wait was making my eyes wet and sticking french fries down my throat
But I had to press on cause sweeter stuff's on the other side of the moat

Well the cars were turning off Harlem so I had to stop and stare
And I had to gulp for air oh my heart was racing I made my escape
I's red hot to get lemonheaded and live with Alexander the Grape

Sullivan's Social Slub

Brandy Buttersotch bartered and begged
Many Motherwell mustered and mugged
Lucy Liverspots lied oh! And legged
Danny Dungerees digged and he dugged

So's'on Saturday say slips'offs'a Sullivan's Social Slub
Need a nice ner and a nip and a nub
Sup'slides'over Sullivan's Social Slub

Candy Cumberland cookied and cleaned.
Andy Aspirate assholed and ate
Gary Guttergunk gathered and gleaned
Stripey Stripleford stripled ‘em straight

So's'on Saturday say slips'offs'a Sullivan's Social Slub
Need a nice ner and a nip and a nub
Sup'slides'over Sullivan's Socail Slub

Sally Summerdress something and smiled
Vincent Vibraphone hung up and dialed
Fanny Firzafrank frowned fie fonna foe
Seamus Sweatyset swore at the show

So's'on Saturday say slips'offs'a Sullivan's Social Slub
Need a nice ner and a nip and a nub
Sup'lides'over Sullivan's Social Slub

The Garfield El

Faster, hammers
Faster, hammers
Churn and turn into my late train to my lost love
Ring away today, stick, bruise into my felt, or so I felt
I found a skeleton tooth in the junk drawer
And I mean to open the folding green and white door
And take a late train to my lost love.
Faster, hammers!
Faster, hammers!

Listen to those dead pianos, pins stuck in their hearts
Clang tap bell pedal down dead wood chipped and dull dark steel
Rattling and chattering and chilly on a damp November afternoon
On tracks one and two
And twelve and thirteen
On that ribbon spinning and computer colors.
Tick tacks on round wire
Spun steel spark on three rail thin lines

See a minor, a little girl
Ask if she would like for instance some fudge
But I didn't budge, and said I didn't care
I wanted to sit, and I wanted to stare
Spin steel, tick tack on three little strings made three little rails made one note clunk
Three rails squeaking and sputtering down the west side
I found a skeleton tooth in the junk drawer and I mean to open the folding green and white door
And take a late train to my lost love
Faster, hammers!
Faster, hammers!

Chatter down the tracks, you thumb tack smiley skull teeth
Ticking five dollar throwaway pianos past
A late train to my lost love

Faster, hammers!
We're almost there

I'd like to tell you a story, kids
but instead I'll change the subject
Listen to this tune, it sounds like a condolence card
Bought at the last minute for someone you can't stand
For someone you never liked
And isn't it cute

La la la...

Listen to this tune I'm playing now, kids
Does it seem sad
Does it remind you of when

The Wayward Granddaughter

He said "Come on now babe
Let's take a little drive
Go slumming down the Carson's in my black X-5."

Samples from the Clinique counter and up the escalator
And then a knowing glance from last night's cute, talkative waiter
Surprise, surprise

Going through five hundred king Egyptian size count satin cotton sheets
A smirk hello from the tanning salon boy
My man mumbled, he realized
"They told me that she cheats."

"Oh, don't you start! Jealous heart."
Jealous heart. Jealous heart

I put one foot forward and one foot back
My hand upon my hip
I gave my hair a flip
I can't help it
What's he think I got all this loving for
Well guess what
He don't pay my bills no more

Well I guess
All this stuff
That'll befall ya and bedevil ya
And try ya
I'll move back in with Yaiyai

My daughter, we named her Maureen
Can you believe it
I never believed it, or her
Because she called you Connie
The Don Juan he, my husband, loved redheards and thought this name
Would turn his baby into the same
And each time I see you, Connie
Yes?
I say God bless, my dear departed Peter
That he never had to meet her
His beautiful granddaughter who dyed
It would have killed him again
Her gorgeous red-brown hair black
When she turned 15 behind my back
You lived with me at that time
Yes, I did
You were such a cute and smart and obedient and happy and pretty little kid
My beautiful granddaughter who dyed
Her gorgeous red-brown hair black
When she turned fifteen behind my back
And which Kevin were you dating
I mean letting take advantage of you then
the black one, or the white one

Once upon a time there were two Kevins
You mean two jerks

Once upon a time there were two Kevins
And being with one Kevin was being in one heaven
And not being with the other swell was being in another, well
Kevin and Kevin were best friends since seven
La la la-la-la la la

When they met at Joey Meyer's
Red White and Blue Demon basketball seminar tutorial clinic day care camp
For underprivileged kids
And overstimulated brats.
And they're both wearing vintage throw-back fourty five dollar
Nineteen eighty three White Sox hats
And now at H-F
Point guard and shooting guard

And now at H-F
Point guard and shooting guard
And the drill team shouting themselves deaf
And then back in the back yard
Yours, Yaiyai
With the one and then the next night with the other one and one big secret
I mean two
But little did I know that they knew
They knew

And would slap each other on the back
About what it was they'd do
They knew
They knew

Well, we can talk about it, Connie
But often, memories are better off sung
Remember when you were young
Remember when I was young
Remember when you were young
Remember when I was young

La la la...
La la la...

A Candymaker's Knife in my Handbag

A night out in the tropics
Turned out I couldn't cope
After the School of Fancy Cookery
With Antoinette Pope

I learned brazing and saucing, meringue and sift
Knead, flute and flour
Each Thursday for an hour

Cobblers and plum cakes, tarts savory and sweet
A candymaker's knife in my handbag
A candymaker's knife in my handbag

Well I learned brazing and saucing, meringue and sift
Knead, flute and flour
Each Thursday for an hour

Cobblers and plum cakes, tarts savory and sweet
A candymaker's knife in my handbag
A candymaker's knife in my handbag

That night I was to meet my husband's father, for the very first time

I wore the scarf he sent to me
French silk, scarlet blue and cream
He sits, he waits, a coffee on his knee
I wonder if it's as bad as it might seem

Zapped by the Zombie
Zapped, zapped by the Zombie
Zapped by the Zombie in the two-door Dodge
Twice-baked brioche and pastry pockets
And lock its two-door Dodge

Zapped by the Zombie
Zapped, zapped by the Zombie
Zapped by the Zombie in the two-door Dodge

And I did not fail
To bust off a nail as the Dodge door handle dodges my hand
Delicate, delicate hold my hand
Delicate nectarine upside-down chiffon cake
Dodge down the downtown loop the loop lightly
Hazelnut baby loaves
Hazelnut baby loaves
Hold my hand inside-out upside-down marzipan Milanese
My brain is a blur
Hodge-podge - cardinal slice - two-door, brand new
What am I gonna do
'Cause on the street the amber lights were hellish hot
And the wind in the windows was not giving air
And tropical Napeolons
But it was too late and I didn't care
And I didn't care

Because first I went to meet Dr. Christopolous and his wife Claudette
Who at the time was my close girlfriend
They picked my up in their brand-new Dodge
And we went to Trader Vic's, or Mr. Rick's
And I ordered, like the others, a Zombie
And it bombed me, it just bombed me
And when we got to the stoop my father-in-law said "Were you attacked?"
My aunt, being helpful, said something that made my heart just go sunk
And with a look on her face like something had stunk
"She's just drunk!" she hissed

I reached for the arm of the armchair and missed

A night out in the tropics
Turned out I couldn't cope
After the School of Fancy Cookery
With Antoinette Pope

I wore the scarf he sent to me
French silk, scarlet blue and cream
He sits, he waits, a coffee on his knee
I wonder if it's as bad as it might seem

We Wrote Letters Everyday

Well, no one was too upset
You know we were married in the war
And I went with him to Pennsylvania and California
But he went out the Pacific
And I came back to Chicago to work on the railroad

And we wrote letters every day
Which were later thrown away
And God knows what we wrote or what they said
But this is probably how they read

I left the letters behind
In the basement of the apartment building when we moved
For the mice to nibble on
I wonder how long they lasted

And we wrote letters every day
Which were later thrown away
And God knows what we wrote or what they said
But this is probably how they read

Now, at my wedding, my husband didn't have his close family there as I indicated
He came from a family of priests
At least, there were a lot of priests in his family
And so, eight priests presided over our wedding
Eight priests, it looked impressive
But it didn't sound very good

A gaggle of priests
Or they were like crows around an overly ornate park bench up there
They all had fine voices
But, and I mean this respectfully
They didn't match pitch

Thinking that each one of them was the one in the right
So they made some strange note choices

Listen...

Forty Eight Twenty Three Twenty Second Street

Now, as for my aunt
Who told on me

She was always wearing her turbans

Sailing back to Greece on the Normandy
Having dinner at the captain's table
Sitting on the deck with 5 men surrounding her
With uncle Sam in the back row
Back at home, riding up the Taygetus on a donkey named David
With her soft leather boots dangling off to the side
So full of pride
So full of pride.

Profitis Elias, so high you can see us
4823 22nd St., standing there with cashmere overcoats
And those turbans with their Arabian silver
And ostrich and papagou feather hats
And not far down from our koumbaros Betinis

We've got a secret between us Betinis

In the back of the Hawthorne smoke shop
In the basement of the hat factory
The fedoras got glued together

But in that back basement...
In that back basement, a lot of things got sewn up!

A full compliment of grinchy Italians
Counting up on their stubby fingers, and smoking, I'm told
The least sophisticated cigars
The local lottery and so forth
Like anybody was going to get a nit out of that nut
Though what a lucky loser is our five thousand dollars a day friend and koumbaros Betinis
We've got a secret between us, Betinis

In the back of the Hawthorne smoke shop,
Haberdashery was the least of it
In the basement of the hat factory
The fedoras got glued together

But in that back basement...
In that back basement, a lot of things got sewn up

We've got a secret between us, Betinis.
Five thousand dollars a day
Five thousand dollars a day
Five thousand dollars a day
Five thousand dollars a day

In the basement of the hat factory
The fedoras got glued together

But in that back basement
In that back basement, a lot of things got sewn up!
We've got a secret between us, Betinis

Not that nobody knows, like nobody knows about the white doves that flew out the cake at the brother's wedding
In your hat factory, Betinis, they count up all the buffalo nickels
And silver certificates wrung from Lake Superior spirits
And prize fight foolery, and sluts speaking easy in the closets on 12th St.
And in exchange you put in your pants $5,000 a day to stick under your bed for starters
But later in the laundry, so you can feel free to chase your wife around the table
When you feel she looked at the apricot and boysenberry boy twice

Guns Under the Counter

"Well, good for you.
But we have something too."
So said my aunt

A bowling alley and lunch counter
Filled with fellas on their lunch break
From the Western Electric plant at a slant across the street
And next door when So-and-So's men would come in, and the man himself very often

It was guns under the counter every time
Guns under the counter every time
Guns under the counter every time
And bowling on the second floor

Very often he was there himself
And I, of course, had a special small ball as a little girl,
And didn't I grow up, didn't I grow up to be captain of the Morton girls bowling team? I did!
Though I don't attach much importance to that now, or then
Then riding the old Garfield El downtown
And on up to State Street
And back to guns under the counter
Guns under the counter every time
Guns under the counter
And bowling on the second floor

I never liked Douglas park
And no one likes it now
But that's neither here nor there
There, or here
West of Crawford, where it is I stayed
Chicago straights alliterates
North, and south
I lived in the Ms
But it was down on the south side
Dr. Peter Pane and his brother had their doughnut factory
And I mention it now because

That one day
Now I wasn't there, we were in Davenport at that time
Some north side Irish bullets came zipping through that window
In Cicero
Never stand at a window
And past the counter
Looking for those men
Who had their guns behind the counter
And you could smell the boiled cabbage on those bullets
One of them managed to hit a young pinsetter in the leg
Wouldn't you know it
But luckily Panagoulis
Dr. Peter Pane
Was there to see to it
He took some special blackberry filling right out of his lunch bag
And applied it to the young man's wound
You see, Dr. Peter Pane was an interesting man
And an even more interesting doctor
As he would use no material or remedy that wasn't used in the manufacture
Of his doughnuts down on 82nd and Kedzie with his brother.
But he tempered this by the fact that he would rarely use ingredients
That didn't have some medicinal purpose
Or so he thought

Here in the doughnut factory
They have confectioner's sugar
So sweet it was caustic
And chocolate so bitter that it could kill typhus
Glazing so shiny
It could set back glaucoma
And filling so filling,
You didn't need stitches
The same special blackberry filling that was applied to the young man's wound
Blackberry filling that came straight from Dr. Peter Pane's lunch bag

We were in Davenport
With a big restaurant downtown
And I once kept a jackrabbit in the back yard
And I'd walk across the river to Rock Island to Greek school
On a fine fall day
And I'd look up at the sky
And down at the river
But Davenport changed its name to Hooverville
So to speak, and we had to go to Chicago to move in with my aunt

Seven Silver Curses

My little sister had a glass of wine
No doubt a glass of wine too many
"I bet he's out right now with his Nazi whore
That's right, I said it, that's what she is, and when he
Finally saunters back at three or four,
Don't let him in, put the chain on the door."
But of course I'd let him in, the jerk.

Now my silly little sister went to some vlachos coffee-grind reader
Ad had a gypsy glint in her eye when she'd smirk
"Since that's how you feel, I know what to do
Make sure she gets fixed before she takes him from you."

It's a hot August night and my sister and I are creeping down south Halsted
Towards a storefront past a storefront stoop and a moon
And a star and a placard that says Madame Maria's.

"Tell me your troubles,
But five dollars first."
That's what she said
And of course, I thought the worst

Charlatan, phony
Fraud gypsy bitch whose Greek was bad and English was worse
I held tight to my purse

My sister did the talking and I looked down
And tapped my foot and sort of twisted on one heel.

Madame pointed to corner
And twisted her shawl,
Uncovered a dusty old crystal ball

I peered in despite myself

Somewhere on some love seat, my husband was there
Paying court to his mistress and stroking her hair
I saw it for myself
"I can't believe it!" I cried
Madame Maria said, "Well, I had a notion
So before you came in, I prepared half a potion

Now you must do the other half
I wrote you a list
You must get seven part-silver curses made special out of bullet bits by some Pollock I know in Evergreen Park
And dip them in the potion and drop them in Buckingham Fountain at 3:13 on Friday morning
And then she'll be gone, you'll be rid of her!"

Quick, for the potion, we have to get three dozen crabapples that fell off a raggedy old tree right in the southwestern corner of Columbus Park!
Faster, we have to go up to Caputo's Produce and Fruit Market on Harlem and get the garden snake that lives in the banana bin!
Hurry, we have to get the mercury out of the old thermometer they have through the north-facing doors
To the left by the shoe-shine boys in the lobby of the Monadnock building!
And don't be late, for you must get the silver out of the teeth of one George Karmalitis
Who as we speak lies dead under a dirty wool blanket in the basement of the morgue of Laretto hospital
The silver teeth of a man killed by a jealous wife!

I wasn't always an old maid
I didn't always walk down the street
And have the children yell at me Spinny Spinny the Spinster
And try to knock the hat off my head
I had a fiancee, or he led me to believe I'd soon be his fiancee
And I did believe him, as I had every right to
And I'd put on my best dress and we'd go dance at all the dances

And I'd never let the boys from the barracks cut in
They'd come out of Great Lakes, usually straight off the farm anyway
And I'd never really let any of the country club beaus get a chance
Those cream-colored summer suits were never cut to my taste anyhow
And those Hyde Park fraternity fellas were out as a matter of course
I don't enjoy a man in red, so certainly not maroon, that's for sure

I only had eyes for my guy, see
But one night he had said he wouldn't be able to take me
As he hurt his shoulder and had his arm in a sling
But I went anyway and saw him with another woman
And she was wearing his ring

The silver still smelled and smelted down quick into the copper or lead or whatever else it was
And when the metal was still soft and hot you'd engrave the curse into it with a stylus from an old whale bone
I thought for a second of what I might write
Something a little different, but with the correct sort of spite
One of them asked panayia mou to make that blonde's hair fall straight out
The potion was ready back at my apartment
And my sister and I mumbled and crossed ourselves when we dropped the curses in
And I thought of my husband
My husband and her
And I thought of me and him, of what we were
I thought of our wedding day

And I was happy, very simply happy
Do you hear it
A modest young woman's simple contentment
It's probably a sunny day, and I think it was
The birds were chirping
And I felt like I was dancing on air
But not very far off the ground
I wonder if I knew even then that things wouldn't always be perfect
That one day he'd seek solace in the arms of another woman
And that to win him back, to win him back, I'd have to do this

3:11!, 3:12!, 3:13!
On a hot August night everyone is asleep
But the crows were watching, witching and my temple was twitching
Twitch, twitch, twitch, twitch, twitch, twitch, twitch, twitch
Fountain, sweet fountain
Fountain, sweet fountain
Let your water react and turn the curses to fact and come true
Fountain, sweet fountain
Fountain, sweet fountain
Let your water react and turn the curses to fact and come true
And they do

The instant we dropped them in, our hearts started to race
And a wind came up off the lake; make no mistake, we felt something released out into the city
And I swore
And I swooned
As I swept back somehow to Austin, I don't remember how
Scared of what I had wrought
But terrified, I didn't get what I had sought

Oh Jimmy, where you been so long
Oh Jimmy, where you been so long
Oh Jimmy, where you been so long

Oh Jimmy, where you been so long
Oh Jimmy, where you been so long
Oh Jimmy, where you been so long

And as the clock struck eight the next morning
My husband was next to me with a smile on his face
And I looked, no blond hairs on his pajamas
And it was as if I had been awakened from a bad dream

Though Let's Be Fair

Though let's be fair
I had other loves before my husband
Other sweethearts
Tom Kitsos, for instance
And another I won't mention

I loved him truly, or so I thought
Turned out in another snare he'd been caught

They were to get married that June
And all the relatives
From New Hampshire and Harrisburg, were coming
And the day I heard, I went home
And closed the door to my room
And I laid down on my bed
And I may have cried
Very briefly

I watched and wondered if they would last
I tried to tell myself "put it in the past,"

And that June
As I was the organist at our church, didn't you know
I was up in the choir loft, looking down
On all their friends and relations
Playing as they walked down the aisle

I'd see him 'round some
We'd nod and smile
I couldn't decide if I was still in love with him
After all this while

I'd see them together at church
And they'd look sort of grim
It didn't seem as though she was happy with him

Slavin' away

Slavin' away
All for you my love
And i've nothin to show for it
Cept my dusty old book full of pictures
A dusty old book
Tell me a story
Bout how i wasn't so tired
From my slavin' away

I ran off
Put on corduroy knickers that i got from the coal shovelin' kid
And hitchhiked in a rickety old ford
Hitchhiked in a rattly old norton side car
Down strange roads
In the purrin' rain, as the poet put it
On up to st. Paul
On a cold day in the middle of the fall

And they picked me up for not wearin a dress
And suspended my sentence
If i wore somethin with a strap that was pink
And i scrubbed up on somebody's sink
So now i catch the canadian pacific
And not be too specific, just somewhere up north
And get into lumber and slumber when i like
And in the spring ride down into cheyenne on my bike

I looked out the window
And i stuck my head out the door
And the snow was melting so slow...
And the sky was light but so gray...

Slavin' away
And all for nothin' my love
Cookin and washin in the morning
And startin at 9:25
I assemble six boxes of little plastic christmas trees
And put in the blue leds
On kid toy cell phones with borg batteries
And then on to the sewing machine
Stick the labels on purple t-shirts
And the arms on pull-over jumpers for the uk

Slavin' away
All for you my love
And i've nothin to show for it
I've nothin to show for it

I could see her lookin in the mirror at me
Wonderin' if it wasn't plain for everyone to see
Nothin ever seemed to turn out how it might be
I could see her doubting now that all had gone and went
That anything she got was equal what that she'd spent
That she never seemed to get back what that she'd lent

Anyway they did have a son
And by the time he was married and i played at his wedding too at holy trinity
I was choir director myself
Rehearsals in the basement twice a week
I demanded we'd be in peak condition
And everything seemed to be going quite well
I got along well with the priest...

Rehearsing my choir

But there was one other man with whom i didn't get along

The bishop
Would head down, head down to deerport station
To see what stars on the silver screen might be seen
Or broadway stage were all the rage
With his black leather autograph book
And his black leather pastoral pumps
And his pressed black robes
And his tidy black beard of which he was so proud
And his hat that stuck out in a crowd
But there he'd sit
At his table at the edgewater hotel
Wearing his ecclesiastical furs
And lunching with two giggly and none too healthy looking young men
And in his shirt pocket up close to his heart was his autographed picture of robert mitchum
Which he no doubt used in an impure way

And i was at home rehearsing my choir

On christmas day
In the afternoon
I got a call at home
The bishop was on the phone
Wanting the choir to go and sing
On some channel 44 thing

And i said "out of the question!
The rest of the day is for their families!"
And the bishop became furious
All that time singing western music
Christmas carols, backsliding
And no time to represent the diocese
But of course he was just upset because he wanted to be on the show
And he hated women

And i knew he was angry with me
But i couldn't worry about it
I went about my business
Rehearsing my choir
Rehearsing my choir

(da da da da da da da)
Again!
(da da da da da da da)
Ugh, altos, out of tune!

(da da da da da da da)
That's not good!
(da da da da da da da)
That sounds horrible

Next sunday was my late sister's namesday
La la la

And the bishop was coming that day to our church to deliver a sermon
Which would give me quite a big surprise

"Decadence in the church!
Betrayal of our traditions!
Look up in the shoir loft, for instance, the lady in red
Eva!
I ban her from receiving communion
And remove her as choir director!"

I couldn't believe my ears
And the congregation couldn't believe theirs
And my husband was furious when he was told, as he wasn't there at the time
And letters were written and phone calls were placed
And the matter was taken up, and i was granted an audience

And i sat there nervous and frightened
When into the room
Stepped his eminence
The archbishop

They had a strange deliberating process at his initiative
As it was his prerogative alone
But the hierarch with the tallest hat and longest beard would stand in the middle
And the prelates with shorter hats and beards radiated out
With the archbishop in front of them
And then they began to intone
And i was left on the other side of the door, alone

And when they came out, bishop nikolaki was sent to San Jose

Does it Remind You of When

How the years have gone
It's come to this
A rose on his lapel, in the open coffin I'd give him a kiss

I have to go up north to play at his funeral
And his wife is there
In some chapel she's picked out
And there's not even an organ
I have to play on some broken upright piano

Listen to these low notes

What a joke
And you have to park and you couldn't even hear the ceremony in the cemetery
because the noise from the traffic and construction is so terrible

And I stood there in the slush
And I walked along, very slowly
To the tree by the turn
And I went in front of my mother and father and sister and husband's graves
And looked over to the sun setting to the right

Tick, tock. Tick, tock. Tick, tock. Tick, tock
And I thought of myself
And I thought of them
In the cold hard ground

You still can't believe
You still can't believe

I didn't believe it then
And I don't believe it now
I didn't believe it then
And I don't believe it now
I didn't believe it then and I don't believe it now
But there it is

Listen to this tune I'm playing for you now, kids
Does it seem sad
Does it remind you of when

Shady grave
Come the summer it will be
Shady grave
Come the summer it will be

Well I can hear the cars just
A hundred feet behind
And I smell the rock salt in the air
And I know in my bones it isn't fair

And the sun sets in the sleet to the side

In my little thatched hut
Where blue-green grass grows by the brook
I lounge and i look
(i lounge and i look, i lounge and i look)
For my own true love to return
To come rowing in his rowboat back.

In my little thatched hut
Where blue-green grass grows by the brook
I lounge and i look
(i lounge and i look, i lounge and i look)
For my own true love to return
To come rowing in his rowboat back

I'll go to the flower stall
And get a violet violet to put in my jet black hair
And make him tell me which one is the more fair.
And in the meantime i cry

In my little thatched hut
Where blue-green grass grows by the brook
I lounge and i look
(i lounge and i look, i lounge and i look)
For my own true love to return
To come rowing in his rowboat back

In my little thatched hut
Where blue-green grass grows by the brook
I lounge and i look
(i lounge and i look, i lounge and i look)
For my own true love to return
To come rowing in his rowboat back
Boat back!

I'll go to the flower stall
And get a violet violet to put in my jet black hair
And make him tell me which one is the more fair

And in the meantime i cry
But what does it matter
Because when i see him again, it'll be tears of joy

Tears of joy, tears of joy, tears of joy, tears of joy
Tears of joy, tears of joy, tears of joy, tears of joy

In my little thatched hut
Where blue-green grass grows by the brook
I lounge and i look
(i lounge and i look, i lounge and i look)
For my own true love to return
To come rowing in his rowboat back

I'm in no mood

I'm in no mood to comb my hair
There's a chill in the air
And it's catching
Catching

I'm in no mood to comb my hair
There's a chill in the air
And it's catching
Catching
Catching
Catching

I was so drunk last night i didn't even undress for bed
And the pin in my hair was still stuck in my head

I'm in no mood to comb my hair
There's a chill in the air
And it's catching
Catching

I'm in no mood to comb my hair
There's a chill in the air
And it's catching
Catching
Catching

I was so drunk last night i didn't even undress for bed
And the pin in my hair was still stuck in my head

I was so drunk last night i didn't even undress for bed
And i swear the pin in my hair got stuck in my head

I'm in no mood to comb my hair
There's a chill in the air

And the pin in my hair was stuck in my head
I didn't undress for bed
I was so drunk last night

I'm in no mood to comb my hair
There's a chill in the air
And it's catching
Catching
Catching
Catching

Black-hearted boy

Darling black-hearted boy
All the color's gone out of my ribbon loom
As i've only got the worst to assume
Take your sheet metal sheers
Cut a slit up the side of my dark blue dress
For a last time lie your love confess

Get your gut
Some home made twine
String up silk your tiger bow
Don't paint your board
Moonlight white
Go dangle your fishook out in the gutter again

See the smoke from your kiln
Pine boughs burn the bricks dead hard in their fog
As i stand cold with my back broke by the bog
Find your cross cut saw
Come blunt and jagged and dry and try
Cut my tongue out to keep on your wall up high

I tipped my toe
On the bamboo strip
I took stone honey in exchange for my rags
Don't dare paint your board
Moonlight white
Go dangle your fishook out in the gutter again

See the smoke from your kiln
Pine boughs burn the bricks dead hard in their fog
As i stand cold with my back broke by the bog
Find your cross cut saw
Come blunt and jagged and dry and try
Cut my tongue out to keep on your wall up high

I tipped my toe
On the bamboo strip
I took stone honey in exchange for my rags
Don't dare paint your board
Moonlight white
Go dangle your fishook out in the gutter again

Darling black-hearted boy
I went down to wash my robe in the river
I thought of you and started to shake and to shiver
Leaning there on the rocks
I see myself slip down and float
'Til the brackish warm current stops up my throat

You swore you swore you'd never leave
You swore you swore you'd never leave
You swore you swore you'd never leave

Bitter tea

I've got a special category business
Down by the multifunctional Dr. Sun yat-sen memorial rollerblade rink
Down by the home of bitter tea
Bitter, bitter, bitter tea
Bitter, bitter, bitter tea

I've seen you slinking off of snake alley
Why not come up through the hall of butterflies
And past lane 170
Into our dragon protector layout
And try some bitter tea
Bitter, bitter, bitter tea
Bitter, bitter, bitter tea

On the 13th day of the 5th lunar month
Outside a hot spring bath
The old banyan tree looked down on me

Aren't you curious
Aren't you curious
A little curious
About what the osmanthus blossoms taste like

I think you're curious
Yes, you're curious
A little curious
About what the osmanthus blossums taste like
With a cup of bitter tea
Bitter, bitter, bitter tea
Bitter, bitter, bitter tea

On the 13th day of the 5th lunar month
Outside a hot spring bath
The old banyan tree looked down on me

I am a crazy crane
I lost my true love in the rain
I am a crazy crane
I lost my true love in the rain

Teach me sweetheart

Come away
Teach me, sweetheart
Come on past
Brave young batchelors
I'm alone
Teach me, sweetheart

My mother in law was standing by the stove
Hissing like a snake, hissing like a snake
Hissing like a snake
She gave orders to spill my blood
She gave orders
To spill my blood, i thought

I thought, i thought, and i thought some more

Come away
Teach me sweetheart
Come on past
Brave young bachelors
I'm alone
Teach me, sweetheart

My father in law was lying on his bed
Growling like a dog, growling like a dog
Growling like a dog
He gave orders to spill my blood; he gave orders
To spill my blood, i thought

I thought, i thought, and i thought some more

Come away
Teach me sweetheart
Come on past
Brave young bachelors
I'm alone
Teach me, sweetheart

My sister in law was sitting on her stoop
Crawing like a crow, crawing like a crow
Crawing like a crow
She gave orders to spill my blood
She gave orders
To spill my blood, i thought

I thought, i thought, and i thought some more

Come away
Teach me sweetheart
Come on past
Brave young bachelors
I'm alone
Teach me, sweetheart

My brother in law was leaning on the love-seat
Tapping with his tail, tapping with his tail
Purring like a cat
He gave orders to spill my blood
He gave orders
To spill my blood, i thought

Waiting to know you

I'm waiting to know you, far away
Send up a balloon says write to me soon
I'm waiting to know you, far away
Set up at the pier, wait 'til you get here

And when i'm about to give up hope
But nope
With my telescope
I'm standing guard the navy yard to see
Could there one for me be
Baby oh no where did you go

I'm waiting to know you, far away
Flashlight the cave; listen short-wave
I'm waiting to know you, far away
Dredge up the lake; all the trees shake

And when i'm about to give up hope
But nope, with my telescope
I'm standing guard the navy yard to see
Could there one for me be
Baby oh no where did you go

I'm waiting to know you, far away
Send up a balloon says write to me soon
I'm waiting to know you, far away
Flashlight the cave, listen short-wave

And when i'm about to give up hope
But nope, with my telescope
I'm standing guard the navy yard to see
Could there one for me be
Baby oh no where did you go

Baby oh no where did you go

The vietnamese telephone ministry

I thought myself an unworthy thing
Despairing of my case all the time, boys
I thought myself an unworthy thing
Despairing of my case all the time, boys
Damn it all, damn it all to hell
Damn it all, damn it all

I thought myself an unworthy thing
Despairing of my case all the time, boys
I thought myself an unworthy thing
Despairing of my case all the time, boys
Damn it all, damn it all to hell
Damn it all, damn it all

Preserve me, preserve me, protect me, save me
So vile, so violent
Whose thoughts are spent
So vile, so violent
In thinking how they may
So vile, so violent
My steps betray
So vile, so violent
How in a foul mishap may me entrap
Who hid in traitor grass their cunning cord may catch me as I pass

I thought myself an unworthy thing
Despairing of my case all the time, boys
I thought myself an unworthy thing
Despairing of my case all the time, boys
Damn it all, damn it all to hell
Damn it all, damn it all

I thought myself an unworthy thing
Despairing of my case all the time, boys
I thought myself an unworthy thing
Despairing of my case all the time, boys
Damn it all, damn it all to hell
Damn it all, damn it all

I went to the right road ministry at 4801 s. Normandie
I went to the armenian brotherhood bible church at 5556 harold way and while i was at it went to st. Sarkis
And then i went to the inglesia evengelica rey de reyes y senor y senores at 2605 w. 7th st.
And the alpha y omega--and the brotherhood of the cross and star and kingdom of god in faith at 3810 w. Slauson
And i drove around listening to the greater bethany tape ministry
And to the sweet hour of prayer mission
And i went to st. Innocent orthodox and jesus in delight
And then finally i called up the vietnamese telephone ministry
At 323-221-7625
323-221-7625
323-221-7625
323-221-7625

Oh sweet woods

I was in tahoe, on the california side
Waiting in the lobby at 665 1/2 frontage road
When two extra-blond, short-sleeve, button-down
White-shirt, blue-tie, mystery mormons
Came in and put this music on
Came in and took me by the arm
And as they had me marching through the parking lot
And as they were marching through the parking lot
They blew into their shirt-pocket microphones
Like this
And then they drove me to an albertson's outside of boise
And took me into a back room.
And they said they wanted to balance my checkbook
And they said the wanted to organize my receipts
And itemize my expenses
And that i had the key
To a safety deposit box
With treasury bonds and the key
To another safety deposit box
Where i'd stashed away
The only pewter pocket watch
That ever belonged to
Joseph smith's great-great uncle's brother-in-law
And i said you've got the wrong eleanor friedberger.
And then they sang at me like this

Borneo

I was so bored with my old life
I was so bored with decent odds

My new roommate left her debit card
Some sort of test for me. It's too hard
Try to run an errand. Nervous sweat
I rush back home and if i win i'll give her half
I bet
Online casino in the caymans
Legal disclaimer writ for layman's

I moved back into new canaan
Babysit my sister's kids; its rainin'
They fuss a bit while i put them to bed
And grumpy, sitting on the couch, i get it in my head
Take metro north. A silver candlestick
To aquaduct on lirr. Pick

I was so bored with my new life
I felt like i knew all the odds

I bet 'gainst myself i wouldn't wager
My boyfriend's mother's mansion (nothing major)
I stole the deed one night when she was drunk
I drove onto the reservation with it in my trunk
Sensors beep the threshold when i crossed it
Thirty thousand marker soon i lost it

Baltimore inner harbor (sports) zone
Being courted. He's talking on his cell phone
"let me tell you why i think i love her
She knows you always take the bye week dome home team to cover."
Go up to pimlico and i choose
It's no fun if it's fine when you lose

I was so tired with all the angles
I was so bored with losin' easy

So i gambled on going further a-field
So i flew to sydney and then to bali and then to jakarta
And called on my step-father's ex-business partner
Major timmy sastrosatomo
And he set me up as a silver smith/batik dabber
In a house once owned by the princes of mataran.
And he told me all his troubles

We bribed a cfo at semen cibinong
To get them to buy a 40% stake
And we got a 5 million dollar order from nieman marcus,
Which we filled about 10%
But i did sell them my children's book
Which i said was a south sumatran
Folk tale--which went like this:

I played cards for seven days straight,
Was up $47 dollars late
Evening as the sun went down i saw
The ace of diamonds up his sleeve--black velvet on his paw.
I fold, say goodbye politely.
They bark, you don't get off that lightly

I dreamed of a casino way up in the hills of borneo
Where i lost with the giant flying squirrels and orangutans and great
Morman butterflies all day long.
'Til the bulldozers turned us into whole fruit fruit bar sticks and
China markers

Police sweater blood vow

Forget the dogs and forget the sheep
It's only you who affects me
On the fun fair track road and helter skelter fall
On my ice skater's bruised knees

Vibrate buzz buzz ring and beep
Tell me what time is it now
Vibrate buzz buzz ring and beep
Tell me baby what time is it now

Blood love sliver locket and police sweater blood vow
Nativity jingle, carole and cry
Chain smoking ashes all over himself
Laugh and hug your white wine wife

Vibrate buzz buzz ring and beep
Tell me baby what time is it now
Vibrate buzz buzz ring and beep
Tell me baby what time is it now

Parking lot reading, cover my eyes
You're a sick moaner, now hold your sides
On christmas eve and dizzy escaltor malls
Retrace steps for not lost gloves

Vibrate buzz buzz ring and beep
Tell me baby what time is it now
Vibrate buzz buzz ring and beep
Tell me baby what time is it now

Well i went to sleep sitting up
See the diary and cry out
That's not right, babe! You're here and i'm there
That's not right, babe! You're here and i'm there

Vibrate buzz buzz ring and beep
Tell me baby what time is it now
Vibrate buzz buzz ring and beep
Tell me baby what time is it now

Nevers

There's a town i know called nevers
No nevers
Never wasn't was what it weren't

When it wasn't once. Knew nevers
Knew nevers
Nothing never i'll ever learnt

There's a village i visit, that's vaguely
Sorta vaguely
Vaguely yes i seem to recall

Though it's unclear clearly- vaguely
Very vaguely
Can't say it's been there once and for all

I put back on my overshoes
And got in my renault
The trips reset so i'm unsure
How far it is to go
But then it hits me (slap)
I've left it off my map

There's a city i saw signed something
Must be something
Something never quite so defined

So much so how somewhere something
(though some sing)
So to speak's the uncertain kind

In an index looked up where-it-was
Exactly where it was
Just in fact to make sure i can't

Set a course straight through to where it ain't
And where it ain't
Ain't gotten to except at a slant

I put on my new black boots
And pack up my citroen
And out of town it huffs and puffs
I set off there alone
And then it hits me (slap)
I've left it off my map

There's a place i passed called once upon a time
Tiny once upon a time
Never wasn't weren't what it was

Set the clock back twice or once upon a time
In once upon a time
Never knew when it wasn't there because

Benton harbor blues

As i try to fill all of my empty days
I stumble round on through my memory's maze
Of all my past, only the sadness stays

I was moping down by the bridge
I rode a bike in the snow to the mini-mart
I thought of the ways that i've broke my own heart

It's not for me to fill the blue sea with tears
But when i think back on all the wasted years
All the good cheer and all of the charm disappears

I wore the exact same clothes for five days
The bailbondsman gave me a smile
I was just thinking of only my sins all the while

As i try to fill all of my empty days
I stumble round on through my memory's maze
Of all my past, only the sadness stays

Whistle rhapsody

The isolated lady
An isolated old lady
A dignified dame who keeps her own counsel
In love with the out-of-the-way
Identifying with the unfamiliar
Contemptuously turns her back on the wicked world
With its vulgar delusions and correspondingly
Scorns its regard

Our lady alone
With her scarf over her head
And her pricey purse over her shoulder strap
Wonders up at the heavens
And for yesterday yearns
The days of old

Often, she surrounds herself with
Like-minded bluestockings
And together they regret the dear beloved
Simple folk struggle with their own confused
Concerns, still

But she puts her pity on pause
And withdrawn from the delicate
And uncorrupted by the crude
She resigns even her/ own
Designs-
Then all at once
Brings in a breath
Purses her purple
Her honey-black lips
And lets loose a high
And round and resonant
And glad and grave
And westward, whistle

The philadelphia grand jury

There ain't no more favors to ask;
There ain't no petitions to pass;
It's all in the hands, it's all in the hands
Of the philadelphia grand jury now.
More crooked sons of bitches you can't ever have come across.
Make sure that they notarized my will.
Make sure mom don't look at the news.
We already know there ain't no suspense
That the philadelphia grand jury strings me up.
More crooked sons of bitches you can't ever have come across.

Duplexes of the dead

I went on down unto the duplexes of the dead,
Where the shades are drawn and the shadows shut
Unless you know the magic word.
(seldom said but often heard, bite your lip!)
Then spin around three times: on our honeymoon.
My husband sat still
With a look in his eyes and a pen in his left hand.
He wrote on the varnish the magic word.
(seldom seen and never heard.)
He shushed me then slumped backwards dead asleep.
I went grumpy sitting in the sun by the umbrella stand,
Making every single unreasonable demand.
I covered my head and went to the office pool,
Dipped in reverent a re-soled mule
And asked the chlorine fumes if there something they wanted to bring up.

Automatic husband

Thanks for asking.
Yes it's true, we've been waiting for you.
We've been waiting for you.
Persuade your husband he should stay
at our disposal for today and take down everything we say
About the new school bus assistant snuck in charge
of leaving seven sleeping children in their seats, in a trance
induced by air-conditioning.
So i went back up to our room
And told my husband to sit down on the end-table
And that he was getting very sleepy
And when his eyes went out i put the pen back in his left hand.
At phases 8 and 31 the four faculties are done, but the principles are some
The solar period, if you look, is like the bishop in the brook, so it says in this book,
Writ by the new school bus assistant snuck in charge of leaving seven sleeping children in their seats
In a trance, induced by air-conditioning.
And don't forget the imaginary map
Of the manifestations of murder-making
Owned by the undertaker's office
(otherwise known as the cadaverous cosmeticians)
Local # dead-as-a-doornail in a church mouse's chin.
Or so said the birth-chart i sent away to new mexico for.
It was made by a special commission of navajo basketball coaches and blonde ladies.

Ex-guru

One of those blond ladies had a certain hold on me.
I went to all her seminars by the airport in the double tree.
I even let her use nephew's seaplane in the bahamas for free.
But she means nothing to me now.
I tell myself that everyday:
She means nothing to me now.
I tell myself every single day,
I'm quite convinced i escaped her sway.
I burned all my clothes with eucalyptus juice;
Ripped out the floors and painted all the platforms puce;
And i went so far as to sacrifice a second snake to zeus,
So she means nothing to me now.
I tell myself that everyday:
She means nothing to me now.
I tell myself every single day,
I'm still convinced i escaped her sway.
But when she mopes in the moonlight on her mesa in march,
Does she kick up a thunderstorm
When she thinks of my betrayal?
She means nothing to me now.

Clear signal from cairo

It's a clear signal from cairo: calling me back to your arms.
Desert winds are strong but they're not strong enough, love of my life.
Desert winds are strong but they're not strong enough, baby doll.

My egyptian grammar

I never thought it could have happened to me.
But on the morning of my eldest daughter's second wedding, i blacked out
They said it was it was just stress, but i didn't think so:
I couldn't remember the 15 minutes before.
A white-haired half samoan girl from darwin
Gave me a ride, it seems; she let me the car in.
But what it was she said, i couldn't say.
Now, that clearly didn't happen. I consulted my egyptian grammar.
On p. 333 was the hieroglyph for motorcycle helmet.
I combined this with a leather-back's shell as i was i felt instructed.
I xeroxed it and posted it down by the bike lock-ups at the oriental institute
Maybe a nether-world entity would see it and pass it on to the responsible.
That kind of thing must happen sometimes.
Now that clearly didn't happen. I consulted my egyptian grammar.
On p. 4428 was the hieroglyph for french canal boat.
I met on the midway someone channelling up a whatever it wasn't:
There are 17 sections of cymbals in the orchestra of the oversold, it said.
Your youth is lost and doesn't it now seem you can't make smoke only steam
Now that clearly didn't happen. I consulted my egyptian grammar.
On p. 5566 was the hieroglyph for a blue jay.

The old hag is sleeping

My baby's angry. He's always so angry;
He smiles only when he can give me abuse.
What's the use. What's the use?
The church bells are busted again.
And at cakewalk class i'm out of sync.
I peek at granddad's watch and take a drink.
Linen being pawned on a eclipse.
Pack the swatches in the pony-cart.
Before the gate he squints and's ready to start.
My baby's angry, he's always so angry.
At best he ignores me and don't curse and stare.
Despair, oh despair!
He gets pink roses sent by:
The other woman now lives upstairs
(you think she thinks he really cares?)
I go and retire by nine.
He's in the kansas city cabinet today;
Pretend i'm asleep and i hear him say:
The old hag is sleeping! Now old hag, stay sleeping:
If you never wake up, it's heaven (as it were):
Widower! Widower!
My baby's angry, he's always so angry.
He smiles only when he can give me abuse.
What's the use? What's the use?

Japanese slippers

Down at the shell shed the boys are pickin' at their pearls.
The hole in my mitten lets the rain get in.
I bought 22 ounces from the petrol park, waiting at the light;
I'm never gonna make it back in time
So geraldine and me can begin
Before mister raymond and his japanese slippers comes creepin' in.
I sit with the fan on my face and sip shandies all day.
I learned to sleep standing up so i don't have to make the bed.
No tobacco for my rolling papers, warm water in my cup
I'll have wait all morning
Before geraldine and me can begin;
Before mister raymond and his japanese slippers'll come creepin' in.
Loaded up with turkey carpets and green glass diamonds
I drove back and forth for five long rolling moons.
And everyday and every night i thought of back at home
And i couldn't get the notion out of my head:
That before geraldine and me could begin
Mister raymond and his japanese slippers'd come creepin' in.
Everything is always a little late;
Trippin' on those japanese slippers seems to be my fate.
It was my job to cut down all the poplar trees
And i'd sit on the stumps and listen to the finches.
And look out at the field and eat honey out of the jar
And wonder why it always seemed
Before geraldine and me could begin
Mister raymond and his japanese slippers would come creepin' in.

Navy nurse

I got warnings from jealous friends;
Cases of borrowed clothes
And a vial of dramamine from my mother.
And she said, "forget what mom likes ‘cause things have changed";
Taught me how to make booze at home:
Call it "old uncle zeke" and drink it early next week.
Now, if there's anything i've had enough of it's today.
It's nice to go nautical when choosing a doormat.
Oh so nice to go nautical when choosing a doormat:
I trust my navy nurse smile will put them on their feet again;
I know my navy nurse smile will put them on their feet again.
Save a glacier name for my daughter
For when the snow turns red when the train pulls away.
Listen to them whisper:
(she's alert, she's open-minded, she's involved)
(she's alert, she's open-minded, she's involved).
So on a warm winter night—
On a worry-free winter night
(still a woman who enjoys feminine props,
Like a filmy sky crowded with filmy white clouds)
In parrot green and lemon yellow
Appeared champagne's daughter
(sitting in a blue lacquered chair
With wide gypsy stripes).
Now, if there's anything i've had enough of it's today.
For it seems no matter whether i weekend in nice or newark,
As it were, i get no peace.
"so you shirk
The excursion and watch them remove from the hold
This year's champion dwarf marigold?"
But as there's no snakeroot anywhere on the vessel,
Or at any of the scheduled landings,
And certainly no leopard flower
At least he's a first-class gold brick.
(she's alert, she's open-minded, she's involved)
(she's alert, she's open-minded, she's involved).)
Took the velvet-caped me (let me tell you) from the golden slope.
Riding the golden gulf weave,
Park this florida houseboat
On the rocky coast so i can see.
Sit side by side beside myself me.
On a ninety inch sofa and matching loveseat,
Listen to them whisper:
If there's anything i've had enough of it's tonight.

Uncle charlie

Listen, i'm so unbored
"the magic word is relax".
I'll rub ho-toi, his god of happiness,
The one that came with or without boys,
And make my wish for the day:
No more revenge cobbler or whiskey pie.
My cheeks will be the color of dead jellyfish lying on the beach.
Let me tell you how
Many 18th century grandfather clocks can you squeeze into your neighbors' niches.
(if only i knew.)
I offered: become a collector of small objects.
Make my wish for the day:
No more revenge cobbler or whiskey pie.
My cheeks will be the color of dead jellyfish lying on the beach.
Was i a senior junior appraisal appraiser at mistie's auction hut in centereach
Or was i a low level high level appraiser of appraisal at snugaby's
Crazy quilts and collectibles collection in hempsted hollow?
I can hardly remember.
Last year uncle charlie sang a different tune:
"the two words i hate most are ‘good enough'."
Flipped through the sliding slack racks:
"look at what it says on my red-patched pocket:
If you're going to be something, why not be something special?"
Pull out the loathsome weeds.
Don't worry big girl;
He sat me down on his handmade mexican mountain chair
And showed me his calendar for the next six months.
Now make my wish for the day:
No more revenge cobbler or whiskey pie.
My cheeks will be the color of dead jellyfish lying on the beach.
To locate my ex-boyfriend check the yellow pages under plywood.
We lived together under a sears bellissimo bedspread.

Right by conquest

If you wish to wait until dusk i respect your policy.
But by all means, my liege, lay siege, lay siege,
Or whatever otherwise you might want to call it.
We would only be restoring to the rightful from before the migrations of the peoples, you could put it,
Or, and i'd prefer, right by conquest.
Are the defences, then, to be let down tonight?
Yes, or maybe, or not quite?
Just a rickety old stockade, i heard,
Half diorama plaster and half recovered water-damaged sheet-rock,
In which is interred….
It's all that stands in your way, if ‘stands' is the right word.
What will you do?
Carried off to decorate your bordello!
The person who told me believes
That the guard, though formerly in the service of duchess of kent,
Is an italian greyhound bitch that loves thieves.
So you might sing,
"well rebecca, get your basket, let's go down to the wood,
You might not pick any berries but you'll come back feeling good.
Well, all right then."
If you wish to wait until dusk i respect your policy.
But by all means, my liege, lay siege, lay siege,
Or whatever otherwise you might want to call it.
We would only be restoring to the rightful from before the migrations of the peoples, you could put it,
Or, and i'd prefer, right by conquest.
Are the defences, then, to be let down tonight?
Yes, or maybe, or not quite?
Will you quench these blushes of mine by present practice?
Will you, being invited, crack this glass?
Here's poison, and here's gold.
Quick children! Before you get old!
"well rebecca, get your basket, let's go down to the wood,
You might not pick any berries but you'll come back feeling good."

Restorative beer

She tells me about last night and her 103rd first date (she counted).
And she counted her pairs of pants again.
I've only got 53, minus the ones i've got on.
I want a restorative beer
So i can take my mind off these tears.
I want a restorative beer.
Get the catalog free from desert house hg-3 box 111111 albuquerque.
Talked on my 25-foot phone extension cord about needlepoint therapy blues. And then i knew
I want a restorative beer
So i can take my mind off these tears.
I want a restorative beer.

Wicker whatnots

Emma was walking with mandeep and jingjing on the second day of spring
Emma was walking with mandeep and jingjing on the second day of spring
She said she was sick of her porch pillars and golden axletrees and silver snuffers and all that sort of thing,
‘cause out of the corner of her eye she saw one cherub ten cubits high.
You can immolate all those oxen, you can sacrifice so many sheep.
You can immolate all those oxen, you can sacrifice so many sheep.
You can be surrounded by your four hundred pomegranates and your bright brass shovels, but you still can't hardly sleep,
When out of the corner of your eye you see one cherub ten cubits high.
How do you arrange a room around a baby grand piano?
In the arabian-tented library guest room;
In the two-tabled dining room art gallery.
And here's one for your party room:
An emergency cigarette behind glass.
An emergency cigarette behind glass.
On a sliding slack rack hangs the calcutta necklace.
And the unique stone rubbings i can decorate with giant jacks:
With wicker whatnots.
With wicker whatnots,
In prettier prints with masses of chintz
And candy box fabrics.
Or the "true meaning of a name"
With poem in a frame.
Where blue means fair; pink, rain;
Purple, variable conditions.
Give me mirror magic in the maxi mood
And i'll throw away my hollywood chin band.
Ulyana, phoebe, and alan knew to say, "we're here for lucy's birthday
In the rivoli bar area lounge," but were worried they might be late.
Then lucy messaged, "my pa ms. Gill will kindly deal with your queries between 6:30 and 8,
Unless out of the corner of your eye you see one cherub ten cubits high."
She was accepting cards and small gifts (before the photos) between 9 and 11
She was accepting cards and small gifts (before the photos) between 9 and 11
When gharzi, ovi, roger, and rachel presented her with something that just sent her to heaven:
One cherub ten cubits high that she could see out of the corner of her eye.

Cabaret of the seven devils

Disregard for how and where and with whom
You amuse yourself encourages bad behavior.
The duke, as was appropriate, held himself in high regard,
And therefore considered himself in need of encouragement.
He expected the people of madrid render him this service.
And as convenient setting for the achievement of this end
He established the cabaret of the seven devils.
This is what happened:
Sick and tired of what passed for diversion at the carnival palace of don diego de cordona
So lucky to have him there in the first place,
And he certainly was in the first place
The duke of medina sidonia, himself,
Made up his mind.
When he must go back to the ‘capital',
Which was soon, "and which i hate,"
He would take his exercise in the town.
The evening in question was a moonless monday.
And carrying his own purse,
With only one valet (only one but by far his best swordsman)
The duke marched into the least auspicious tavern,
Tossed his silver bag at whom he assumed was the proprietor
And said, or barked, rather,
"this establishment will now serve my purposes.
And i should like it to be known as the cabaret of the seven devils."
1234567

Pricked in the heart

Listen, these are not drunken as you suppose.
It might not be 3 o'clock in the morning like it seems:
The little children will be prescient.
And your young men will see shows,
And your old men will dream dreams.
I found a typescript double-spaced,
Printed out on a daisy-wheel (so all femme).
In the former treatise (dear friend theophilus) it was placed,
Written by lisa which was present at the doings of them.
I gathered all the tokens of her passion, people,
Waiting for the promise of her father ("whereof you heard of me").
In the past
John baptized with water; now, with wine.
But don't weep, he'll make sure:
Pricked in the heart the wednesday after last.
In a cash and carry next to mt. Olivet (and all around),
Megan, mary, lisa, and kenisha gave it out, "stick with me."
Or you'll reap the reward of iniquity,
Cashed out and carried to possession of a plot of ground.
Well, the vapor of smoke came up from the earth beneath,
Outside the bodega called beautiful. When it was whom
With su and kenisha, under a silver-leaf wreath,
Called not fit to sit: might as well have come halt out your mother's womb.
I gathered all the tokens of her passion, people,
Waiting for the promise of her father ("whereof you heard of me").
In the past
John baptized with water; now, with wine.
But don't weep, he'll make sure:
Pricked in the heart the wednesday after last.
A light shined in the lodge and the chains slipped off her hands,
So to speak: she packed up her things and she sailed off to cyprus,
Sending greetings from felix with a please to put paul on.
Misunderstands
Me, she, and her all went home (gave up the boast) and left lisa to type us.

Widow city

Antioch agent wrote a letter per usual
Dated it's 100 degrees perpetual,
Sent via the swift dromedary traversing her ways
On the odd and even days.
It said the lion's come up from his thicket
And they've managed to void, "my lottery ticket.
Drunk on wormwood in widow city,
Widow city's drunk on wormwood.
Tomorrow night when the sun sets at nine
I might need tangle myself with the degenerate plant of a strange little vine.
And foxes on the mountain, girls!
There're foxes on the mountain, girls.
So to negotiate the deserts and pits
You can't rely on your dimwits."
Wag your head and clean your clocks;
Ready for the rendezvous with the sticks and the stocks.
Taught the wicked ones the ways
said what was sent via the swift dromedary traversing on the odd and even days.
Drunk on wormwood in widow city.
Widow city's drunk on wormwood.
Tomorrow night when the sun sets at nine
I might need tangle myself with the degenerate plant of a strange little vine.
They've made my chain even heavier if you can imagine.

I'm going away

I'm going away, I'm going away
I'll be back some old day
I'll be back some old day
I'll be back some old day

I'm going away, I'm going away
I'll be back some old day
I'll be back some old day
I'll be back some old day

Please tell me man what more can I do
Please tell me man what more can I do
Lord knows I can't get along with you

I'm going away, I'm going away
I'll be back some old day
I'll be back some old day
I'll be back some old day

I'm going away, I'm going away
I'll be back some old day
I'll be back some old day
I'll be back some old day

Get away from my window quit knocking on my door
Get away from my window quit knocking on my door
I got another man now can't use you no more

I'm going away, I'm going away
I'll be back some old day
I'll be back some old day
I'll be back some old day

I'm going away, I'm going away
I'll be back some old day
I'll be back some old day
I'll be back some old day

When you're in trouble I work to pay your fine
Now I'm in trouble you don't pay me no mind

Get away from my window quit knocking on my door
I got another man now can't use you no more

I'm going away, I'm going away
I'll be back some old day
I'll be back some old day

Drive to Dallas

If I see you tomorrow
I don't know what I will do
If I see you tomorrow
I don't know what I will do

I'm not going to cut my hair or run around the block
I'm not going to drive to Dallas with blurry eyes ever again

With windshield wipers that can't wipe away my tears
And everything I own piled up in the backseat
With a speeding ticket from that speed trap town
The one that got my license revoked

But I never got pulled over
Never got questioned
No, I never got pulled over
Never got questioned
But I still drove all around, all around, all around without it

If I see you tomorrow
I don't know what I will do
If I see you tomorrow
I don't know what I will do

I'm not going to cut my hair or run around the block
I'm not going to drive to Dallas with blurry eyes ever again

No tomorrow won't be the day I drive up to Dallas
With red eyes, blurry eyes and dull wipers that no don't work
Everything piled up in the backseat so I can't use the mirror
You said we had unfinished business but it's finished now
You said we had unfinished business but it's finished now
You said we had unfinished business but it's finished now

If I see you tomorrow
I don't know what I will do
If I see you tomorrow
I don't know what I will do

If I see you tomorrow
I don't know what I will do
If I, if I, I don't know
If I, if I, I don't know
I don't know, I don't know, I don't know

If I see you tomorrow
I don't know what I will do
If I see you tomorrow
I don't know what I will do

If I see you tomorrow
If I see you tomorrow
If I see you tomorrow
I don't know what I will do
I don't know what I will do
If I see you tomorrow
What I will do
I don't know what I will do

I don't know
I don't know what I will do

If I see you tomorrow
I don't know what I will do
If I see you tomorrow
I don't know what I will do

I'm not going to cut my hair or run around the block
I'm not going to drive to Dallas with blurry eyes ever again
I'm not going to cut my hair or run around the block
I'm not going to drive to Dallas with blurry eyes ever again

The end is near

The end is near.
The end is near, the time has come
There ain't no way
Nobody will save you now

The end is near
The end is near, the time has come
Don't even think
That there's a way out of this

Down the road and up the creek, it's over
It's such a clear and certain hell of thing, it's over

"You're on your own"
You're on your own, once upon a time
The other night, you couldn't do nothing right

"I'm on my own,"
You said to yourself down on your luck
Woe is me, etc. Lonely, see
The worst times weren't so bad, compared to this
Though that ain't much comfort
I might try to reminisce. No.

The end is near
The end is near, the time has come
Don't even think
That there's a way out of this

The end is near
The end is near, the time has come
There ain't no way
There's nothing will save us now

Charmaine champagne

She's gonna get me folked up, fairly beat
She's gonna get me folked up, fairly beat
She likes a strong sangaree that shakes for twelve hours at least
She's gonna get me folked up, fairly beat
She's gonna get me folked up, fairly beat
And teach me not to get baited with stage whispers like,
Can anybody turn me on

I saw a girl last night called Charmaine Champagne
She wasn't an ex-so and so, not from times square
But she went to Johnny Romero's till it was too hot to handle
And she's got nothing to show for it; no money, no love
But she could always tell you the squarest thing there on the jukebox
She could always sing you the squarest thing on the jukebox baby

She's gonna get me folked up, fairly beat
She's gonna get me folked up, fairly beat
She likes a strong sangaree that shakes for twelve hours at least
She's gonna get me folked up, fairly beat
She's gonna get me folked up, fairly beat
And teach me not to get baited with stage whispers like,
Can anybody turn me on

I saw that girl again last night called Charmaine Champagne
I said show me how to make all those cups and punches
We went to Johnny Romero's till it was too hot to handle
They said we had to get a quarter pound of peach leaves on a dry and sunny day
And she showed me the squarest thing on the jukebox
Then she sang me the squarest thing on the jukebox baby

She's gonna get me folked up, fairly beat
She's gonna get me folked up, fairly beat
She's gonna get me folked up, fairly beat
She's gonna get me folked up, fairly beat

She's gonna get me folked up, fairly beat
She's gonna get me folked up, fairly beat
She's gonna get me folked up, fairly beat
She's gonna get me folked up, fairly beat

She likes a strong sangaree that shakes for twelve hours at least
She's gonna get me folked up, fairly beat
She's gonna get me folked up, fairly beat
And teach me not to get baited with stage whispers like
Can anybody turn me on

Cut the cake

When I heard the news
I nearly lost my breath
My heart stopped
And I held my chest
How could it be true, how could it be true

I bought ten copies of the paper
I tried to buy them all
But they wouldn't let me
How could it be true, how could it be true

I cut out the clip
And wallpapered my wall
I took it to work to make copies so I could paper the whole house
How could it be true, how could it be true

I scanned it too
So I could show it to my out-of-town friends
I wrote a letter to the editor
To give praise and a mention to the names they forgot
And the answers they didn't question
And those answers they didn't question

So what's one to do
With all this fame and glory
Hire a pr firm
To tell the rest of the story
How could it be true, how could it be true

Write it down quick
So I can make the 4 o'clock news
I know it's only local
But if it's what they choose
How could it be true, how could it be true
We'll celebrate over dinner
Maybe dancing too

And who cut the cake without any warning
Who cut the cake
With my special knife
Into tiny little pieces for every fella's wife

And who cut the cake without any warning
Who cut the cake
With my special knife
Into tiny little pieces for every fella's wife

How could it be true, how could it be true
How could it be true, how could it be true
How could it be true, how could it be true

Even in the rain

You wore your wrestling badge from your wrestling match
You wore a t-shirt over your suit that says you just won state
I guess I still don't mind that you were late
I guess we must have done a lot of kissing
Must have known not what we were missing

She followed us to the motel and I lied all the way
I rode on the back of your bike all the way to Lake Geneva
I let you wear the helmet even though you never offered anyway

Even in the rain, even in the rain
Even in the rain, even in the rain, even in the rain

This could be the day the earth stood still
Take it from me I know we've had our fill
Never been this calm as I wander ‘round
Never bring harm to those that I surround

Well I keep consuming to avoid my own thoughts, they tell me
Love keeping busy, love keeping busy at any old cost
But there's nothing I could say would keep my mind off of you
And there's nothing I could do to keep my mind from thinking of you

Even in the rain, even in the rain
Even in the rain, even in the rain, even in the rain

She followed us to the motel and I lied all the way
I rode on the back of your bike all the way to Lake Geneva
I let you wear the helmet even though you never offered anyway

Even in the rain, even in the rain
Even in the rain, even in the rain, even in the rain

Even in the rain, even in the rain
Even in the rain, even in the rain, even in the rain

She followed us to the motel and I lied all the way
I rode on the back of your bike all the way to Lake Geneva
I let you wear the helmet even though you never offered anyway

Even in the rain, even in the rain
Even in the rain, even in the rain, even in the rain

Even in the rain, even in the rain
Even in the rain, even in the rain, even in the rain

Staring at the steeple

You followed me to Manchester
To meet the guy who says my name
You heard him say my name
You heard him say my name
And now you gotta know where he stands from
Inside a booth or behind a desk
Or on his own two feet
Now we're gonna sit down
Sit down face to face

I'm staring at the steeple
I'm staring at the steeple
I wonder who's preaching
They say it's two women in there
They say one wears a robe
One wears a crystal
One keeps time
The other keeps a pistol

He sent me a check for a thousand dollars
I thought it was a gift but boy was I wrong
Now I'm supposed to go and cash his check
And give it out dollar at a time
Hand it out penny by penny, penny by penny, penny by penny

I'm staring at the steeple
I'm staring at the steeple
I wonder who's preaching
They say it's two women in there
They say one wears a robe
One wears a crystal
One keeps time
The other keeps a pistol

If I can't help you nobody can
If you can't talk to me, who can you turn to
If you don't make up your mind now
I'm going to make it up for you
The days are getting darker and I'm all alone
We're practically married but no you're never at home

I'm staring at the steeple
I'm staring at the steeple
I wonder who's preaching
They say it's two women in there
They say one wears a robe
One wears a crystal
One keeps time
The other keeps a pistol

Ray Bouvier

Ray Bouvier made me shoot the shoe
He won the local lottery and took us out
We put a barricade down the middle of the bed
But that didn't stop me from looking down the barrel
Well I thought I was thinking, but apparently not
Well I thought I was thinking, but apparently not

Ray Bouvier made me shoot the shoe
I kept the bullet as a souvenir and
Took it to the knife show to carve out my name and the date
But it was too heavy to wear around my neck
Well I thought I was thinking, but apparently not
Well I thought I was thinking, but apparently not

Ray Bouvier made me shoot the shoe
If Kristi kills me I'll know who told her
We've never kept secrets from each other at all
But luckily, it wasn't her favorite pair
Well I thought I was thinking, but apparently not
Well I thought I was thinking, but apparently not

Ray Bouvier made me shoot the shoe
He took us out drinking after he won the local lottery
We put a barricade down the middle of the bed
But the smoke never cleared from the room, not at all
Well I thought I was thinking, but apparently not
Well I thought I was thinking, but apparently not

Keep me in the dark

The bazaar in ouarzazate
Had an emerald for sale, we heard
In the silver band were etched the initials of you know who

His momma pawned the gulf stream
Returned the antiquities to Italy
Said in no uncertain terms buy it back for my youngest son

Please don't tell me nothing
I'd rather, tell me nothing
Keep me in the dark
With the opposite of anything

Please don't tell me nothing
I'd rather, tell me nothing
Keep me in the dark
With the opposite of anything

Please don't tell me nothing
I'd rather, tell me nothing
Keep me in the dark
With the opposite of anything

Please don't tell me nothing
I'd rather, tell me nothing
Keep me in the dark
With the opposite of anything

Went through my per diems
By the middle of the morning
You won't mind me writing my own receipts for boys or smoke

Contracted three merchant fevers
Embellished two early evenings
At an arcade in the afternoon looked back and forth with you know who

Oh please, don't tell me nothing
No I'd rather tell me nothing
I keep me in the dark
With the opposite of anything

Please, don't tell me
I'd rather tell me
Keep me in the dark
Oh keep me in the dark

Please don't tell me nothing
I'd rather, tell me nothing
You keep me in the dark
With the opposite of anything

Please don't tell me nothing
I'd rather, tell me nothing
You keep me in the dark
With the opposite of anything
No, no...

Lost at sea

There was a time I was proud to be me
But now I'm all
Lost at sea

There was a time when I couldn't complain
But now it's you
I only blame

Baby I'm, baby I'm, baby I'm, baby I'm, baby I'm
Maybe I'm not me

There was a time I was happy to know you
Because you were me
And I was you

But now I wish I had left you
Without knowing
All of his feelings

Baby I'm, baby I'm, baby I'm, baby I'm, baby I'm
Maybe I'm not me

You were my best friend
And I pulled out the rug from under your feet
I can't believe I had the nerve to leave you standing out on the street

There was a time I was proud to be me
But now I'm all
Lost at sea

Baby I'm, baby I'm, baby I'm, baby I'm, baby I'm
Maybe I'm not me

Cups & punches

I saw a black girl last night called Charmaine Champaign
She wasn't a worn out ex-so-and-so, no not from times square
But she went to Johnny Romero's till it was too hot to handle
And she's got nothing to show for it: no money, no love
But she could tell me the squarest thing on the jukebox

She's gonna get me folked up, fairly beat
She's gonna get me folked up, fairly beat
She's gonna get me folked up, fairly beat
She's gonna get me folked up, fairly beat

Teach me not to get baited with stage whispers
Like, "can anybody turn me on?"
Show me how to make cups and punches
It's so simple without a simple syrup
You have to gather a quarter pound of young peach leaves on a dry and sunny day
And the cost is so uncertain since peach leaves are seldom sold

She's gonna get me folked up, fairly beat
She's gonna get me folked up, fairly beat
She's gonna get me folked up, fairly beat
She's gonna get me folked up, fairly beat

She likes a strong sangaree that shakes for twelve hours
Keeps warm for twelve months, then sits for six months more
Then she's gonna sing me the squarest thing on the jukebox

She's gonna get me folked up, fairly beat
She's gonna get me folked up, fairly beat
She's gonna get me folked up, fairly beat
She's gonna get me folked up, fairly beat

Take me round again

Take me round again in the wildwood where the bluebells grew
With the merry widow waltz singing take me back to New York town
When the birds in Georgia sing of Tennessee
Fifty miles from Boston
When a fellow's on the level with a girl that's on the square
That's the talk of New York town

Well I've got rings on my fingers
I saw a show called Carrie marry Harry
Down among the sugar cane, listen Lester
When a fellow's on the level with a girl that's on the square
The longest way round is the sweetest way home
I wonder who's kissing her now

In Brattleboro Vt performing with the people's choral union
The longest way round is the sweetest way home
With the merry widow waltz
At the fatal wedding the Dalton boys
And the Dalton boys ran a simple game
I've got rings on my fingers
See saw, Margery Daw

Well I've got rings on my fingers
I saw a show called Carrie marry Harry
Down among the sugar cane, listen Lester
When a fellow's on the level with a girl that's on the square
The longest way round is the sweetest way home
I wonder who's kissing her now

At the fatal wedding in Brattleboro Vt
Performing with the people's choral union
Where death got married til nothing ‘cept yourself do you part
I've got rings on my fingers
Nobody knows, nobody cares
Listen Lester
The Dalton boys ran a simple game
Where my caravan has rested
See saw, Margery Daw

Yeah I've got rings on my fingers
I saw a show called Carrie marry Harry
Down among the sugar cane, listen Lester
When a fellow's on the level with a girl that's on the square
The longest way round is the sweetest way home
I wonder who's kissing her now

With the Japanese tragedienne
And the old Nestor company at the Blondeau tavern
At the new Amsterdam theatre playing "a Parisian romance"
Down among the sugar cane
The man who owns Broadway up in a balloon
I saw a show called Carrie marry Harry
I wonder who's kissing her now

Yeah I've got rings on my fingers
I saw a show called Carrie marry Harry
Down among the sugar cane, listen Lester
When a fellow's on the level with a girl that's on the square
The longest way round is the sweetest way home
I wonder who's kissing her now

In the wildwood where the bluebells grew
That's the talk of New York town
When the birds in Georgia sing of Tennessee
Take me round again
When a fellow's on the level with a girl that's on the square
Singing take me back to New York town
With the scandal of the Honduras lottery
Fifty miles from Boston

I've got rings on my fingers
I saw a show called Carrie marry Harry
Down among the sugar cane, listen Lester
When a fellow's on the level with a girl that's on the square
The longest way round is the sweetest way home
I wonder who's kissing her now

Listen Lester
I've got rings on my fingers
Nobody knows, nobody cares
Where my caravan has rested
The Dalton boys ran a simple game,
In Brattleboro Vt performing with the people's choral union
See saw, Margery Daw
At the fatal wedding

Well I've got rings on my fingers
I saw a show called Carrie marry Harry
Down among the sugar cane, listen Lester
When a fellow's on the level with a girl that's on the square
The longest way round is the sweetest way home
I wonder who's kissing her now

Down At The So And So On Somewhere

Trigonometry tutors often go to dance class three times a week
You taught me that at some point that night
Connecting dots tangent to your cheek
You check your timewarp watch in the car
The angle ain't all oblique

There we were
Down at the so and so on somewhere
Cross town from where we were some other time
Don't you remember we were happy there
Can you remember it right now

I can picture powder blue matches in the mirrors and I had to go
Get things at the gas station fast forward to the last time and apropos
Of nothing, called you up in a car the very same color so

It couldn't have been cuter
Down at the so and so on someplace
Not far from where you lived some other time
Don't you remember we were happy then
Can you remember when right now

The dog's asleep in its crate
And everything is right with the world perhaps
But I wouldn't see you like that again for years
Now one can't make good the gaps
I wake up trying to text emoticons and XO all caps

Would you meet me
Down at the so and so on somewheres
When was it ever enough, was never enough
Don't you remember we were happy there
Can you remember it right

There we were
Down at the so and so on somewhere
When was it ever enough, was never enough
Don't you remember we were happy there
Can you remember it right now

Well, I'm leaving, I'm leaving, I'm leaving
I'm leaving you babe
I'm going

Well, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, sorry right now
Oh, girl, then I ain't

Well, I'm leaving, I'm leaving
Leaving you babe
Oh, girl, then I'm going

Well, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, sorry right now
Oh, girl, then I feel so bad

Well, I'm leaving, I'm leaving, I'm leaving
I'm leaving you babe
I'm going

Well, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, sorry right now
Oh, girl, then I feel so bad

Norwegian Wood

( This Bird Has Flown Tribute to the Beatles LP )

I once had a girl, or should I say, she once had me
She showed me her room, isn't it good, norwegian wood
She asked me to stay and she told me to sit anywhere
So I looked around and I noticed there wasn't a chair
I sat on a rug, biding my time, drinking her wine
We talked until two and then she said, it's time for bed
She told me she worked in the morning and started to laugh
I told her I didn't and crawled off to sleep in the bath
And when I awoke I was alone, this bird had flown
So I lit a fire, isn't it good, norwegian wood

One More Time

( Uncut - White Riot: A Tribute To The Clash Volume 1 )

Must I get a witness? for all this misery
There's no need to, brothers everybody can see
That its one more time in the ghetto you know
One more time if you please now
One more time to the dying man
They say one more time if you please

The old lady kicks karate
For just a little walk down the street
The little baby he knows kung fu
He tries it on those he meets
Cos its a one more time!

Cos it's a one more time in the ghetto
One more time if you please
One more time for the dying man
One more time to be free

You don't need no silicone to calculate poverty
Watch when Watts town burns again
The bus goes to Montgomery

Cos it's a one more time in the ghetto
One more time this year
One more time for the dying man
One more time if you please
One more time

Entrances uncovered
Street signs you never saw
All entrances delivered
Courtesy winter

Entrances uncovered
Street signs you never saw
All entrances delivered
Courtesy winter

The mad kid walked left-side south-side towards me
He was about seven
His mother was a cleaning lady
She had a large black dog
And the mad kid said
"Gimme the lead
Gimme the lead
Gimme the lead"
I'd just walked past the alcoholics' dry-out house
The lawn was littered with cans of Barbican
There was a feminist's Austin Maxi parked outside
With anti-nicotine anti-nuclear stickers on the side
On the inside and they didn't even smoke
Anyway two weeks before the mad kid had said to me
"I'll take both of you on,
I'll take both of you on"
And then he seemed the young one
He had a parka on and a black cardboard Archbishop's hat
With a green-fuzz skull and crossbones
He'd just got back from the backward kids' party
Anyway then he seemed the young one
But now he looked like the victim of a pogrom

Entrances uncovered
Street signs you never saw
All entrances delivered
Courtesy winter

Entrances uncovered
Street signs you never saw
All entrances delivered
Courtesy winter