B i o g r a p h y
 (by Steve Huey)

Handsome Boy Modeling School was a teaming of quirky super-producers Prince Paul (best-known for his work with De la Soul and Stetsasonic) and Dan "The Automator" Nakamura (fresh off his underground success with Kool Keith's Dr. Octagon album). Taking their name from an episode of the cult Chris Elliott sitcom Get a Life (which was sampled several times on their album), Paul and Dan adopted the über-stylish alter egos of Chest Rockwell and Nathaniel Merriweather, respectively. Their debut album, So...How's Your Girl?, was a loose concept record packed with guest stars: rappers Del tha Funkee Homosapien, J-Live, and El-P; members of Cibo Matto, Brand Nubian, and the Beastie Boys; star turntablists like DJ Shadow, DJ Quest, and Kid Koala; electronica artists like Moloko's Roisin Murphy and Atari Teenage Riot's Alec Empire; and even Saturday Night Live's Father Guido Sarducci. So...How's Your Girl? was released on Tommy Boy in the fall of 1999 to mostly favorable reviews, and the opening track, "Rock n' Roll (Could Never Hip Hop Like This)," was licensed for a TV ad campaign. Nakamura subsequently moved on to a host of other highly conceptual projects, including Deltron 3030, Gorillaz, and Lovage. The duo returned to record-store shelves in 2004 with White People, their first album for Elektra.




So... How's your girl
- 1999-10-19 -

Rock N' Roll (Could Never Hip Hop Like This)
Magnetizing
Metaphysical
Look At This Face
(Oh My God They're Gorgeous)
Waterworld
Once again
(here to kick one for you)
The truth
Holy calamity
(bear witness II)
Calling the biz
The projects
(pjs)
Sunshine
Modeling sucks
Torch song trilogy
The Runaway Song
(feat. Kid Koala)
Megaton b-boy 2000

Father speaks


White People
- 2004-11-09 -

Intro
If It Wasn't For You
Are You Down With It
The World's Gone Mad
Dating Game
Breakdown
It's Like That
I've Been Thinkin'
Rock and Roll
(Could Never Hip Hop Like This) Part 2
The Hours
Class System
First...and Then
A Day in the Life
Greatest Mistake
Dating Game Part 2

Outro


Add some NEW lyrics (B-sides, live tracks, Cover), want to CORRECT some of them or found a BUG ? Just send a little EMAIL or simply post a message on the FORUM. Thanx !

So... How's your girl

Rock & Roll (Could Never Hip-Hop Like This)

Talking :
When you asked talented men making music it’s something.
But when they are from the one family, it’s worth hearing.
And what’s more ?
They are brothers as well.

Rapping :
Ladies and Gentlemen
Check it out y’all

??
Cut the fuck’in crap
??

Check it out y’all
Are they crazy
Once again

Ooooh, the TV

Automator, Automator, Automator on the vator

Check it out y’all
Just listen to this.

Check it out y’all

Ch-Check it out y’all
Hey Rock & Roll (Could Never Ever Hip-Hop Like This)
X4

(Musical interlude)

Ch-Check it out y’all
Hey Rock & Roll (Could Never Ever Hip-Hop Like This)
X4

(Musical interlude stuff)

Hey Rock & Roll (Could Never Ever Hip-Hop Like This)

Here’s Ms. Bowers.
Spring is here and we are as always ready to serve you.
Although you have not used your charge accounts for some time
It is due at your service and advised away that you
(can provide some purchase for)??
our new clothes-
Our spring dresses, suits, coats, are beautiful
And the value unusually good.

Ch-Check it out y’all
Hey Rock & Roll (Could Never Ever Hip-Hop Like This)
X8

*** Thanx a lot to Stan for this one ***

Magnetizing

[Del]
D-E-L he rips microphones
D-E-L he can't leave it alone, can't leave it alone
He can't leave it alone
Ahh, D-E-L on the microphone, strike ya dome wit the hype poem
Yeah, it's the type of shit ya like to get, get wit it
Ah, such a beautiful beat I'm 'bout to destroy
For all weak MC's ahh check it check it

Back in your presence it's the pres
Dispensing these rhymes like Pez
Full color, high res
I digest is high biased, alotta MC's ride my privates and I don't like it
I'm the master in innovation, that ain't the ?reef?
Well perhaps I'll bring it center stage then so you can peep
My rap style fail safe that derail fakes
They just a pale-make of my own chromosomes
I'm a critically-acclaimed maniac that attack tracks
On wax or drum machines, for your underlings
Plus I leave performers wit an ornery, ?quarterly's?
That'll turn your crew into disorderly's
Assorted freestyles I drop at my disposal
Make you move your mojo and bounce like a pogos
In the club, they grub on tortitos from Toyo's
A pitta and soda, and everything that's owed us
Everybody's doughnuts rushin for cash
Bustin ya ass, some losin just as fast
I crash computers wit my viruses, fry your disk drive
Wit wise words, suckas get on my nerves
I'ma make you go "Hmmm", wet you like H2O
My flow refreshes, need lessons
Well we open for business if you dig this
To all the bigwigs and labels sellin you fables
Hey you, you ain't cuttin nothin, touchin my production
Wit that pre-school rap, I say fuck them

[Chorus]
Hypnotizing, magnificent mind set
Whenever I'm next, the shit you haven't tried yet
Live shit, magnetizing, peep what I'm advertising
My alliance got your third eye cryin

D-E-L he rips microphones, D-E-L he can't leave it alone
Can't leave it alone, he can't leave it alone

Del, advancing dancing over beats
Romancing microphones wit my glorious speech
No shorts like BVD, I'm next like DVD
I hit the metropolitan wit music I be modeling
Showin off, goin off, wiggin
Biggin up the town where I come up from, my humble beginnings
The neo-narrator, creative care-taker
I'm from the Five Flavors like Solar Flares on paper
Don't go fold things, let's go smoke things
Let dank or chocolate tai so we can all get high
I touch any beat wit heat I pack
Nigga, I frequent that
In my never-ending quest see you scratch
Speakin facts, we can rap
Fuck scrappin and tappin, jaws I'm crackin
Doors, open for brothers comin after me
Fuck apathy, I ain't got time to blame the world for my problems
I'm a grown fuckin man and I understand
Plus knowledge being gathered, each day make me
Speak this way, so get it
The way that I spit it, critics couldn't never call me half-witted
I'm the Riddick Bowe flowa for those in the know
My logo represents thought-processing
To keep em all guessin, wit these lyrical blessings
Class is in session, class is in session

Chorus

"You can achieve the hypnotic state
By saying those things in your mind
To yourself that is said to you on the recording
And then give yourself thirty suggestions
That will change your attitude towards crude"

[Del]
Most MC's have much to do wit nothing
I attack bigger issues, something to take with you
Time is just a measurement of life
So why waste time on the false, waste time on the mic
Waste time on the high personas, we're on the
Television tryin to get Del to listen
To that garbage and gobbledy-good
So I read a book, I prefer Manga wit Mega
My repectable rhyme styles and textures
Yes you're gettin extra
Flex your little style, I fluctuate
Too much to take in one sitting
And I stun citizens
Describing shit that we livin in
That don't make a better sense
I stick up kids who pick up bids
And murderers deserving the same thing, I'm sick of this
But meticulous wit metaphoric miracles of mind power
Praying mantis techniques that wreck beats
And pesky, prototypes that shouldn't made it off the assembly line
Much less to their distributors they're miniature
Mind states is immature and primative
Talkin 'bout all the crack they cookin up, in the crib
But you don't shock me, I see these things
Don't participate wit the heartless, I'm an artist
Who's bound to be out the roach-infested apartments

Chorus 2x *replace "Hypnotizing" w/ "Magnetizing"*

Don't cry, dry ya eyes 4x

*** Thanx a lot to Nature2QB for this one ***

Metaphysical

Metaphysical style
M I H O
Metaphysical style
With the good day style
Uh yeah tell em Miho

Hypothesis scientific parabolisk
My lineal projectile puncture
Chronical modern, bisected, injected, reflections
Computating thoughts through terabytes of RAM stored in a floppy
(Uh battery operated style)
T1, nine connect, intersect, riding brain waves
(Silver surfer style)
like silver surfer while his smoking hand perforates zombie source
I get metaphysical

It's a good day
(Good day)
It's a good day
(Metaphysical style)
It's a good day
(Metaphysical style)
It's a good day
With the good day style
It's a good day
And the fabulous clothes you wear
It's a good day
And the way you weave your hair
Uhhhhhh get it

Industrial toxic fumigation.
Symetrical polar resource on the express-way through your skull piece
(Yeah, the expressway to your skull style)
That the tethering of the moon's two astrodomes
In the form of cats and the dogs
(Really mild style)
Defogging the mind's eye's view
In the never ending quest for cheddar just call me Mini
As the bar rises and the fries are from room service
Nervous infections, and chic in the metaphysical landscape
(Yeah in the reflections)

(Metaphysical style)
It's a good day
(Good day)
It's a good day
It's a good day
(Good day)
It's a good day
It's a good day
(Good day)

Apocalytic fusion equips secondary thought processes, interjection, there'll be introspection.
Hmm reflective imagery burnt into the cornea of inter-dimensional trans-global marketing schemes
Loop dreams culminating of horizontal poetry,
Intertwining sheet music epic in propertion,
Dramatic implosions, inclusive of the mases,
I get Metaphysical

It's a good day...
(Metaphysical, oh yeah, good day, good day)
(Miho H A T O R to the I, Miho Hatori, Uh Uh Uh Uh )
(It's a good day)
(Damn it was a good day)
(Page is still rolling up)

*** Thanx a lot to Shane for this one ***

Look at This Face (Oh My God They're Gorgeous)

[Chris Elliot - "Get a Life"]
Look at this face, what do you see?
Look at it Dad, what do you see?
What do you see? Say it, say it!
Uhh ayuahh it's a face!
Yeah but what kind of face?
Uhh, pale.. pasty.. psychotic
No Dad!
It's a neatly chiseled, well groomed, drop dead handsome face!

{*violin music starts*}
Sparkles - professional male model..
Sparkles - professional male model..

You must be another Handsome Boy graduate
Oh my God they're gorgeous!
You must be another Handsome Boy graduate
Oh my God they're gorgeous!
You must be another Handsome Boy graduate
You must You must You must be another Handsome Boy graduate
You you You must You must be another Handsome Boy graduate
You must You must You must be another Handsome Boy graduate

[Chris Elliot]
I'm gonna become, a male model
I'm like a rough diamond that just needs a little polishing, that's all
And that's exactly what Handsome Boy Modeling School's gonna do for me

Oh my God they're gorgeous!
You must be another Handsome Boy graduate ..
You must be another Handsome Boy graduate ..

3: Handsome Boy Modeling School wants handsome fellas
to train to become successful male models.
Bring your beautiful face, and a check for $60

Oh my God they're gorgeous!
You must be another Handsome Boy graduate
Oh my God they're gorgeous!
You must be another Handsome Boy graduate
Oh my God they're gorgeous!

*** Thanx a lot to dj.flash for this one ***

Waterworld

"For those that know me..." [Rakim]
"For those that know me..."
"For those that know me..."
"For those that know me, indeed I like to flow"

[Encore]
Authentically raw wit it, see I augmented this industry
To submit to my will, all attempts to limit me
Can kneel, peel caps wit ill raps
Nothing convenes here till your camp gets smeared like pap
What you tryin to tell me, skills never found me
Workin for peanuts amongst jelly MC's, really ain't my steez
Peep game
I plot on different ways to make these styles ricochet through main frames
The day-to-day theme is turn these fake teams gangreen
My main vein's the only thing about me mainstream
You doubt me like the foes of Noah, embarkin in this Ark, the soul controller
While fools caught up in this Del used to blow up
You're inundating wit the out-dated
See all of y'all fall when this cascade hits
Yo D, watch these watered-down clowns get drowned
And lounge sound broken down in Cuba
Tryin to build ships off shit they bit
I spit that major play saliva, taylor-made for cypher sole survivor
Pay the piper if you plan to go inside my covenant
Better come in two's, matta fact come a crew to get you back
Executives, we wet you wit the hymns that leave you and your man
Packin, attackin wit verbal cataclysms
Leavin the average rapper drenched and grab a trench
Guard against my El Nino lingo
A labyrinth of keen flows, concealed within the single
This is Waterworld

"For those that know me, indeed I like to flow"
Waterworld
"For those that know me, indeed I like to flow"
This is Waterworld
"For those that know me, indeed I like to flow"
Waterworld
"For those that know me, indeed I like to flow"

[Encore]
My scripts consist of H20, Hip Hop and Oxygen
I flip commission doctrines that make me Shake-Speare's pier
Upon this here tear I fear not
Killin furious wit the superior onslaught
On top of this isle solo, like Giligan wit a million styles
To throw yo' way wit capital A
We make waves, causin tsunamis to your armies
Splashin like the cracken on Clash of the Titans, writin calmly
Call me Aquarius, each full page a new age
I'm on a crusade to ranter your parade
See 'Core is more than three-quarters of what this rap world secure
So this is Chinese Water Torture for MC's to endure
As I restore this reservoir wit my repetoire of metaphors
Step into the 'Core, better have your life insured
For supernatural disasters, I'm quick to cast a flame to your astral plane
It's bitch-made, get played like Conasta
Waterworld

"For those that know me, indeed I like to flow"
This is Waterworld
"For those that know me, indeed I like to flow"
Waterworld
"For those that know me, indeed I like to flow"
This is Waterworld
"For those that know me..."

[Encore]
What's an MC without concepts, I speak easy comin to offset your plumbing
Like leaky faucets, runnin my dungeon wit aquatic contraptions
The fifth fold's a fish bowl, kick hard as contractions
Wit skitzo-memos closed-captioned
Your lip's sewed cuz hardest to your fraction try to test me
You wouldn't tip-toe through Moses parted Red Sea
It's bound to collapse
So now what makes you think the sound of these raps
Is something different, I'm even pitchin the kitchen sink wit comin with it
Liquefied rhymes rhyme wax
It's time for jack-fakers to vacate, they take up space like the Great Lakes
Makin a great case for me to hate
Paint a picture clear as Evian, raps on tap like Savion Glover
Undercover, peeps wonder, why he became the arcitecht cuz none love us
We spark the shit that makes the blood cometh
Wash away your blockade plus your brigade
Tryin to sandbag clever words together
The weather, the storm, porn's poured on cassette wit Architecht sweat
In the cores of us form when he pass Tech-12's
I delve deep in this abyss, inspect hell
Tell a fallen ang-el to eat a dick if he gets pissed cuz this is Waterworld

"For those that know me, indeed I like to flow"
Waterworld
"For those that know me, indeed I like to flow"
This is Waterworld
"For those that know me, indeed I like to flow"
Waterworld
"For those that know me, indeed I like to flow"

"Flow" *echoes*

*** Thanx a lot to Nature2QB for this one ***

Once Again (Here to Kick One for You)

Yeah...
Uh huh, uh huh, uh huh, uh huh
Grand Puba, Dattie X... dig it

[Grand Puba]
Get up out my way, it's Grand Pub's turn to shine
Hurt MCs ride the pine and get paid, no nevermind
One time as I sew it up like Dr. Frankenstein
Chickens ride the pony cause the rhyme flow genuine
As I do it like that, do it like this
Shorty watch your step or you might get Rocked like Chris
Are you feelin this? You dig the way it's going down?
Now we back in town watch all the chickens crowd around
Niggas try to duplicate my flow but it's difficult
Like a game of Yahtzee
Chickens stress me out like paparazzi
As I flip a flow you desire
Dattie blaze those trees and let's start this forest fire
My rhymes carry like the weight on Barry
Stack cheddar like Combs and buy homes like Larry
I be smoother than Tal, Sharp-ton like Al
When you ballin everybody want to be your pal
No dilly-dally, baggin up the shorter alley
Bouncin in German cars, still playin shot-ball
Brand Nubian cats, here to flip one for you
For sure dog cause this is how we do

Just an old fashioned love song, playin on the radio
Brand Nubian cats, here to flip one for you (2x)

[Sadat X]
Ah shit, I see men mitts (?)
Watch the green van cause inside's the dicks
The prayer beads bleeds from the crucifix
Went tight comin out boy I be down in six
Or when the sun go down, or when it's round in the BX
(?)
Cats on the concourse, still holdin dx (?)
Bums on the street often ask me for change
What's change when I'm tryin to save up for the Range?
I want the whole world and my old girl back
Change that -- I want half the world, and fuck my old girl
You can play the hell out, like those that came before ya
Your style is butt, similar to a cobra
That's your pimp strut
But what you foes is really doin
Is leaving your empire in ruins
I'm the problem solver
I got the brand new revolver
But I got a new album too
I want to be here for that money and the rest of my crew
Yall know it's true-- a nigga like me is due

Just an old fashioned love song, playin on the radio
Brand Nubian cats, here to flip one for you (2x)

[Puba]
Now you know I gots to come back strong
See I been doing this too goddamned long
For me to ever try to come back wrong
Check my pockets and my empty light just came on
Don't wanna do wrong so I think I'm best to make this song
Undeniably satisfiably master microphone mutilator
None greater, ain't no Automator
Grand Puba and Dattie, riding shotty in the Mazarati
As we come and blaze you with this body

[Sadat]
Corner poets get smacked and hit, savagely bit
I go git and then you out of it, permission to quit
I mean right, I keep the green light specials
Half price a slice, you blink twice
I done picked up the dice
I'm that nice, Dattie X the party-starter
Number one heart-ripper-aparter
More vice and gambling than Las Vegas, Nevada
I try harder every day
It's all work and no play

Just an old fashioned love song, playin on the radio
Brand Nubian cats, here to flip one for you (2x)

*** Thanx a lot to jcruelty1 for this one ***

The truth

[Roisin Murphy]
Go ...
Go to the mountain if you must
Go to the burning bush
Happy would ease your troubled mind
How do the fade just stay behind?

I know you better than you think I do
Don't worry babe.. this is why i fell in love with you
The man in the looking glass
Is looking back at you at last

You can't hide from the truth
Because the truth is all there is
You can't hide from the truth
Because the truth is all there is
You can't hide from the truth
Because the truth is all there is
You can't hide

If happy times are too few and far between
It's a pity dear, we can't erase the things we've seen
So disappear, vanish if you wish
Just go before you're swallowed up by bitterness

And the truth is you can't hide from the truth
And the truth hurts because the truth is all there is
I realized some time ago that I would have to let you go

May not be true to see that you would return one day
But in your present state you may as well not be here at all
You wear a thin disguise, it's from yourself you hide
Just take a look at us, we are heading for a fall

[J-Live]
Now presiding in this quarter: hip-hop
Justice, my rap forté
Judge, jury, bailing for prosecuting D.A.
Et ceteras, paraphas
My modus operende
It's carpe diem whether the fact or word is your way
Comprende?
The people versus, you ain't no Sensi
Teaching that style of word-play
We got the words they
Regardless of what your friends say
They're all disable
Striken from the record and deemed indimissable
And this long arm of the law grabs a mighter
Shoot dope lines first and ask questions later
The death sentence of this live litagator
Close the case tighter than the jaws of a 'gator
Stenonographer, that study law again, the jargon
Let your counselors 'a barking, in hopes of a plea bargain
But when you read back verbatim
What they're saying to pursuade them
They realize exactly how i've played them
I come with the truth, whole truth and nothing but
'Cause the truth hurts just as much as fuckin' with lies will
I brew skill with free fills from now until
Plagerizing MC's get their flows distilled

[Roisin Murphy]
Baby I don't die without you by my side
As long as you return into these arms that burn
Baby I won't die just take a look inside
Into these eyes that burn, come to these arms that yearn

I won't die, if you leave me high
I won't die if you're not by my side

And the truth hurts because the truth is all there is
And the truth hurts because the truth is all there is
You can't hide from the truth, cause the truth is all there is
You can't hide from the truth, cause the truth is all there is
You can't hide from the truth, cause the truth is all there is
You can't hide from the truth, cause the truth is all there is
You can't hide from the truth, cause the truth is all there is
You can't hide from the truth, cause the truth is all there is
You can't hide from the truth, cause the truth is all there is
You can't hide from the truth
Because the truth is all there is
You can't hide from the truth..

*** Thanx to Nathan & Tony & Mikal for this one ***

Holy Calamity (Bear Witness II)

Holy Calamity
Scream insanity
All you ever gonna be's another great fan of me
Break!

Bear Witness (Yo!)
Bear Witness (Yo!)
Bear Witness (Yo!)
Holy Calamity
Scream insanity
All you ever gonna be's another great fan of me
Break!

[scratched]This is a journey
This is a journey
This is a journey
...journey

[siren]

There it is!
Bear Witness (Yo!)
Bear Witness (Yo!)
If you never been [?] before [?]

Bear Witness (Yo)
Holy Calamity
Scream insanity
All you ever gonna be's another great fan of me
..Break!Break!Break!Break!Break!Break!

(scratched) I'm the one that does the rockin' ...my
rhymes are legit
I'm the one that does the rockin'- Bear Witness (Yo!)

[scratching]

There it is!
Bear Witness (Yo!)
Bear Witness (Yo!)
If you never been [?] before [?]

Bear Witness (Yo!)
Holy Calamity
Scream insanity
All you ever gonna be's another great fan of me
(scratched)Ho- Ho- Ho- Ho-
Ca- Ca- Ca- Ca
Gr- Gr- Gr- Gr-
Break!

Do it!
Do it!
Do it!
Do it!

Do it!
Do it!
Do it!
Do it!
Kick it up!

(scratching)

Bear Witness (Yo!)
Bear Witness (Yo!)
Bear Witness (Yo!)
Holy Calamity
Scream insanity
All you ever gonna be's another great fan of me
(scratched) Bbbbbbbbreak!

[chanting]

Calling the Biz

1: Yo, di'I- did I tell you about this new project my
man Automator's doin'? It's called Handsome Boy
Modelling School?

Biz: What the fuck is that?

1: Yo, I didn't tell you about that?

Biz: No.

1: Yo, yo, it's ill. It's ill. So what you gonna
contribute to it, Biz Markie?

Biz: What you want me to do?

1: I want you to um... I want you to sing like um...
like, like, like um... like the Bee Gees.

Biz: Oh yeah, like that?

1: I want you to sing like [mac] diva?

Biz: [singing in a high pitch]

1: Yo, you'll do that?

Biz: I can do that.

1: You gonna flip that?

Biz: Flipped it.

The Projects (PJays)

"It may take a long time, but my house will last forever
- and it will have been worth it.
What are you going to build your house with?"

[Dove]
Yo I'm stayin where we gettin crazy love
My noisy neighbors live just above me
up in 13-A, there's drama e'ryday
The Super say he gon' fix the heat for sure
Tchk, I done heard it five times before
Three locks on every door
- cause some folks got the tendency to take
It ain't Beverly Hills, more like Stephanie Mills
I never knew love like this could ever exist
Four corners in your metropolis
Yo it's the PJays pah!
We exquisite like cars made in foreign
See ain't a day out here, ever boring
Where gunshots keep you up instead of heavy snoring
Pipes dripping, instead of rivers pouring
The elevator's broken down (daaaamn!)
and man I'm needin a lift
Thank God we don't stay up on the twenty-fifth
- floor, yo we ain't always at war
It's a lot about the Projects I do adore

Chorus: Dove, Del

But you wouldn't understand it
The PJays is like another planet
Heavy like granite
You wouldn't understand it
The cops will catch you drawers down
Red-handed, it's outlandish
But you wouldn't understand it
The PJays is like another planet
You wouldn't understand it
The cops will catch you drawers down
Red-handed, it's outlandish
"Yo it's the PJays.."
{"cau.. cause where I come from.."}
{"where we live is called the Projects" -> Pos}
".. The PJays.."
{"cau.. cause where I come from.."}
{"you might-might-might, might get done..")
".. The PJays.."
{"cau.. cause where I come from.."}
{"where we live is called the Projects" -> Pos}
".. The PJays.."
{"cau.. cause where I come from.."}
{"What was that you said?"}

[Del the Funky Homosapien]
Come to our projects bout fo' in the morning
So I can tell you what be goin on there
One block gunshots some hot stuff
Sell it to you for a buck, boy that ain't enough!
(C'mon) Handcuffs on your brotherman; my wife's wonderin
When you gonna fix that tenant's plumbing man?
I'm tired - this ghetto's cool, but it's on fire
I see this fool with a crack pipe, lookin wired
Hookers for hire (what?) look at the plywood (look!)
on the building where termites is living (EW)
My wife sleeps peacefully, it ain't easy to me
cause I'm tripping off these peoples with they thievery
Black white chicano - hell if I know
Every guy know about the stolen cell phone
I got the hook-up - police got me shook-up
in court, can't even fart
It's okay though, I got the building, that pay dough
But some tenants act like they can say no (hey)
I'm gettin older in my years
Feel me? I got a folder worth of fears (yup)
But it's cool, we gotta make it better (make it better)
Don't take my sweater (c'mon) y'all make my head hurt
I ain't even gonna finish this song, it's too long
I'ma watch Cops, in my La-Z-Boy, in my thong

Chorus

*** Thanx a lot to dj.flash for this one ***

Sunshine

"Everybody used to think of him as..
Well more like a bum, sort of, a musical bum..
than anything else"

[singing]
Your love, is my sanity
Your love, brings me sunshine
I like what you do to me
I like what you give to me
I wander through this world
Needing you so much
I wander through this world
Dreaming of your touch

[both]
If I could see you again..
If I could just see you again..

Forget about your sorrows
Forget about your heartache
Life is nothing but a shadow
("Ooooh-weeee man!"}
Forget about your worries
Forget about the bad times
Life is nothing but a shadow..
("Ooooh-weeee man!"} ..without your sunshine

[Father Guido Sarducci]
Everybody's been wondering where you been
and, now that we know what happened
We're all wondering where you are
And even though we feel bad we won't be seein you around anymore
We want you to know we feel better, we won't have to worry anymore

[singing]
There's a new star, in the night sky
Could it be you, making me so high
Shine on, shine on, shine on, shine on
Shine on and on and on and on and on..

[both]
If I could see you again..
If I could just see you again..

Forget about your sorrows
Forget about your heartache
Life is nothing but a shadow
("Ooooh-weeee man!"}
Forget about your worries
Forget about the bad times
Life is nothing but a shadow..
("Ooooh-weeee man!"} ..without your sunshine

[Father Guido Sarducci]
We know your only worry now is,
you worrying about us worrying about you
And even though we stopped worrying,
it doesn't we're not still sad
And we're happy to let you know that, we always will be

[Sean Lennon]
I used to think time, was on my side
I used to think the world, could be so kind
That was another day..
That was another time..

[both]
If I could see you again..
If I could just see you again..

Forget about your sorrows
Forget about your heartache
Life is nothing but a shadow
("Ooooh-weeee man!"}
Forget about your worries
Forget about the bad times
Life is nothing but a shadow..
("Ooooh-weeee man!"} ..without your sunshine

*** Thanx a lot to dj.flash for this one ***

Modeling Sucks

[Chris Elliot - "Get a Life"]
I'm not modeling anymore for the two of you!
Well I guess I just had my first taste of the filthy side of this business

Modeling just sucks
Modeling just sucks

Modeling just sucks
Modeling just sucks

Modeling just sucks
Modeling just sucks

Modeling just sucks
Modeling just sucks

I am a male model, not a male prostitute!
Modeling just sucks -- they made me take off my top!
I am a male model, not a male prostitute!
Modeling just sucks -- they made me take off my top!

I am a male model, not a male prostitute!
Modeling just sucks -- they made me take off my top!
I am a male model, not a male prostitute!
Modeling just sucks -- they made me take off my top!

I'm not modeling anymore for the two of you!
Well I guess I just had my first taste of the filthy side of this business

*** Thanx a lot to dj.flash for this one ***

Torch Song Trilogy

[Insert]
"I'm not guilty ahahaha
Does that include the time I stole a
Comic Book when I was 5 years old?
Aha! I'm not guilty of the charges that
Have been filed against me" [end insert]

[Sensational]
{hits joint}Ah! Yea! {hits joint}
Sensational {hits joint} rocking the orthodox hip hop
This is how I do when I strictly rock the spot hahahahaha
Yea this chuckle blitz, ya
I party properly, here it goes...
Holdupholdupholdupholdupholdup
Here we- {laughs} Yo, you can take that back? Yo Yo
{record spins}
I party properly who be clockin' me
I tell em the time be freaky freaky
I script this apocryphal sensational
Avenue pimp and hustla
My lectures the vehicle
I'm skipping off the scene
Woofers get up off the side of my
Mentality running to the beat like gin
Piss poor getting me slobbed by ladies on the job
Freaky in erred
After hours your bad can kiss myself like I'm James Brown
Hip Hop soul-full
Like my tank not full of sugar-bo-bank
When I'm on the microphone I always do my thang
We rode the mainstream
Chuckle blitzed is how it be
When I
Be on the scene
Hitting you for balls that be open
Beautiful jump up location
As I don't stash
I'm like my nephew Travis "Da Menace"
Fat ladies' pick and looking for credit
Fuckin' with my production intelligence don't know ma's queef from fast or
slow
No friction chillity
I always blow with the most
Definitely feeling it To me
A whack emcee could never be
I be with herb kicking the verb
That you hear and heard
Cool out on the couch
While I flick an ounce and
Enter foot in your mouth
Akinyele style with the Brooklyn profile
You know I'm flippin' bucks and looking up
Pimpin' routine
Time flight blind your sight
In your ear
Making you say OH YEA (OH YEA)

Yea it's all about me
I thought you knew that
Throw rocks and pull the global
With the hip-hop
And it just don't stop
LIKE A 12 AM CONTINUATION
Warm sound that could never be erased
Expand
I'm a motherfuckin' one man band
No debate
In what I got
To do with this pace
Is expensive taste {taste echo}

{DJ scratching throughout} "Set this bitch on fire"

[Sensational ]
Like this like this
And like that
Note...with the... overweight..fat
Yea
Cut

[Insert]
"One thing is sure- I'll never play with matches again"
[End insert]

*** Thanx a lot to gbreezy00 for this one ***

Father speaks

Handsome boy modeling school is the best sixty dollars you ever spend
if it wasnt for Prince paul and Automator I would not be the model I am today
And I would not have the confidence to go to the Handsome boy modeling school
Move yourself up in the world go to Handsome boy modeling school
Sixty dollars you wont be sorry for long

Handsome boy modeling school is the best sixty dollars I ever spent
If you got sixty dollars left in your pocket go to Handsome boy modeling school.
You won't be sorry for long
Prince paul and Automator made me the model I am today.
Wasn't for Prince paul and Automator i would be modeling in albania or some balkan country....
Still
Haha ok
If it wasn't for Prince paul and Automator I would not be the model I am today.... and hopefully tomorrow
Hefe
Handsome boy modeling school gave me the confidence to be a model, if it wasn't for them, I would still have sixty dollars
Prince paul and automator made me the best model on the runway in all the balkan countries put together

*** Thanx a lot to Zack for this one ***

White People

Intro

You know it's been about four years since I graduated from the Handsome Boy Modeling School
And I just want to say that their 60 dollar course changed my life
Since my graduation I've traveled to Prague, Milan, Paris, and Buffalo New York
And I now drive a fifty thousand dollar LaForce Automobile
With total suede package, with subwolfers, and specially designed custom glass rims
Also, in my closet, shoes. So many shoes you cannot believe
And next to it a drawer with the socks, full of the socks, more than enough for each pair of shoes. Yes that's a many.
And the Women. Let me tell you, the women, my God
I can't go into the details, let's just say, I know all about the secret garden.

So let me just say "thank you" from nearby the bottom of my heart
To Nate and Chest for showing me that beauty is truly in the Eye of the Tiger.

*** Thanx a lot to Taylor for this one ***

If it wasn’t for you

[Sample]
This, is the story of you
What makes you special, where you come from
This is one of the most exciting stories ever told
Because its about you
And you are one of the most important things in the world . . . you

She ride cus her testament has been day one
A nigga got trust cus she been day one
They ones done, build a fam. Bruce Lee
So we K-I-Sed the BS goodbye
Damsel in distress so I stress good guy
Tarzan and Jane more like Bonnie and Karem
Could you be my sugar water, tonic and cream
Put the dean in my yard, like religion and king-----???
And {ding} diamond you a sight
Like unidentified rims spinning in the night
Me with out your balance just wouldn’t sit right
Like written wouldn’t be past tense without ten

If it wasn’t for you
If it wasn’t for you
If it wasn’t for you
[I need you]
If it wasn’t for you
If it wasn’t for you
If it wasn’t for you
[I need you]

Hey, because of you my little lady named fame
People spot me like nerves spot pain
Put the S on my chest and inside my veins
Before that this darkie had to smile for them to see me
Now them same kids that used to diss wanna be me
Due to me being down with you
Hooked up 82' plus 6
When you gave me my fix
You fixed my house and banking accounts
You fixed me up with too many women to count
Only right for you to have your side niggas too
And even when you don’t come back
At least when you was here for me
The world cheered form you

If it wasn’t for you
If it wasn’t for you
If it wasn’t for you
[I need you]
If it wasn’t for you
If it wasn’t for you
If it wasn’t for you
[I need you]

Pen you my muthafucka
I’m a hold you like piss
Even when the itchy burn make me wanna let go
There you go smudgin, see actin mad funny
But you kissin loose leafs so I can’t be mad
You my confidant when I couldn’t tell pops that report card came
You signed off with me
So when the checks come you’ll be signin off with me
But when I’m dead and gone will you sign off?
Ooh Papermate you light like paper weight
But you pack ink, can make tattoos turn pussy
And when its mush time you be there like a man
in my hand spillin my heart with you blood.

If it wasn’t for you
If it wasn’t for you
If it wasn’t for you
[I need you]
If it wasn’t for you
If it wasn’t for you
If it wasn’t for you
[I need you]

You’re my first born
My lil Capricorn kid
Slid in this world at 1 pound 8 oz.
My little miracle baby
Grown in to a little lady
So fast, like pressing the gas while the tape bounce
Through you, me and your grandfather grew closer
I understand now, all he try to give for me
I wanna give it to you the same way
But sometimes four short and you still live for me
And just want you to know
I may not show all the right feelings or say the right words
But you’re my little black diamond
And always shining in my heart
And that’s way beyond words

If it wasn’t for you
If it wasn’t for you
If it wasn’t for you
[I need you]
If it wasn’t for you
If it wasn’t for you
If it wasn’t for you
[I need you]

You’ve been with me on the inside homie
Puff life in me ever since I was a knee high
I knew I had heart
Ain’t gang related but you relative to blood
AB negative you represent love
Though you break like Pringles
Your heroic in your size
You make David beat Goliath
You heart beaker
Broads love you on Valentines day
Quaker brought beats to my chest before Hip-Hop.

If it wasn’t for you
If it wasn’t for you
If it wasn’t for you
[I need you]
If it wasn’t for you
If it wasn’t for you
If it wasn’t for you
[I need you]

*** Thanx a lot to Andrew for this one ***

Are you down with it

Are you down with it
Are you down with it
Are you down with it

In my words
That I mend
Hand in hand
Across the land
For the line
In time
Peace of mind
For all mankind

What you want to do...

Yeah right you know how it is
And if not here's a pop quiz
Who's gonna strike first
For better for worse
Well that's us
And either with us or against us
So put up or shut up its kill or be killed
An eye for an eye you're gonna get strung up
Like a pow mia in cali for nia
We're all going awol like fuckin' a holes
And there's shit on the flag and blood on the rainbows

Buildings fall after all but we're still livin'
Drop the bomb right or wrong but we're still livin'
Turn the page on the rage I get down with it
Keep on dreamin' on (dreamin on')

Buildings fall after all but we're still livin'
Drop the bomb right or wrong but we're still livin'
Close your eyes I'll surprise I get down with it
Keep on dreamin' on (keep dreamin' on)

Are you down with it
Are you down with it

Peace and love
One truth
High above
No me or you
One side
One love
One way
Which side are you on

What you want to do....

Oh I'm sick of the smiles the destiny's childs and being lied to
I'm sick of the boys and girls and being paid no mind to
I gotta look out for number one and that's me a man with out a country
Who's lookin' out for me who's carvin' my name in a tree
Wouldn't be here with out me wouldn't sleep here with out me
Couldn't die in the street here in the land of the free
Gotta try and find my stars and stripes and be all I can muthafuckin' be

Buildings fall after all but we're still livin'
Drop the bomb right or wrong but we're still livin'
Turn the page on the rage I get down with it
Keep on dreamin' on (dreamin on')

Buildings fall after all but we're still livin'
Drop the bomb right or wrong but we're still livin'
Close your eyes I'll surprise I get down with it
Keep on dreamin' on (keep dreamin' on)

Are you down with it
Are you down with it

Are you down with it

*** Thanx a lot to Carrie for this one ***

The World's Gone Mad

Where's the love
Where's the love
Where's the love
Where

'Cause the world's gone bad
We've lost the love we had

Hey look kids you need to change your tune
That avenue you traveling unraveling soon
You'll be battling doom but does it matter to you
Worried 'bout who was laughing at you
Your appearance is more important that what's really real
'Cause here it is situation's bad not meaning good
A lot be in the hood that got me with
Nowhere to put my trust in no discussion
Spontaneous combustion
Lust and greed if you ain't up to speed
You's a duck in need
Cats ain't got enough to eat
So there's bluffs and beef
Chicks up the street
That tricks come to see
Guns under the sheets
Shells pummel your meat
Forgetting former, still
Dude you're sorta chill sitting on bout forty mill
But his whole quart'll get spilled
Over those sort of deals
That get you sorta killed or up in court looking for appeals

'Cause the world's gone bad
We've lost the love we had
Take me away
'Cause the world's gone bad
We've lost the love we had

So down I want to go
So cold I have to go
So down I need to go
So cold as I go

Yo what up fam
You don't know who I am
Last week you was acting like you was my man
But you wasn't huh
Served you're purpose dog
At the end of the day
Is it worth it all
Immersed in all the worth the world got to offer
But perpetrating proper like a nothing can stop ya
Can't even trust my doctor she in it for profit
And everybody looking for some kind of prophet
Situation mad toxic my man got hit
'Cause the bird he was with wouldn't stop squawking
She juggling five cats and they all lost in
The illusion of love that she used for profit
The usual topic chickens and benjamins
You supposed to be my kin Mexican or Asian European or Korean or Jamaican
Makes no difference
Our existence is still shared between us in essence

Yes the world's gone bad
We've lost the love we had
Take me away
'Cause the world's gone bad
We've lost the love we had

Show some love for your brothers and sisters
Show some love for the whole wide world
Show some love for your enemies and frenemies
Show some love for the rejects on the street
Show some love for the whole wide world

'Cause the world's gone bad
We've lost the love we had

If the world is bad refer to your dad
And his before four score what's the reason he saw for
Karma is real part of the deal when's how you started the deal
'Cause everything is 360
It will start the cartwheel
And snowballs so don't forget now cause I told y'all
Dead the hate 'cause all it do is hold y'all captive
All in the world you're trapped in
Relaxing you can't feel what's happening
I deal with facts man
I was at the crossroads
Dealing with lost souls
That couldn't cross yo
Lost hope off dope
Out to jostle
Any unweary traveler that would fall the talk show
It's foul how they play it
But you can't stray to show love take
Courage and strength and realize we ain't sure as we think
You know

The world's gone bad
We've lost the love we had
Take me away
Yes the world's gone bad
We've lost the love we had

So down I want to go
So cold I have to go
So down I need to go
So cold as I go

'Cause the world's gone crazy
Even though love no more
Show love, show love, show show love
Show love, show love, show love

'Cause the world's gone bad

*** Thanx a lot to Benjamin who corrected some mistakes ***

Dating Game

Talk show host :
And we’re back. Alright Becky, before our handsome bachelors reveal themselves
you have one last question to ask before you decide to go on that big date.

Becky :
OK. Handsome bachelor number one.
On our first date, where would you take me and how would you try to impress me?

Bachelor 1 (Jay-Z) :
So that’s a… that’s a good question ma.
This is what I would do to impress you.
Well first of all, you know where I might take you ?
I might take you over Dame’s house.

Becky :
Oh, really?

Bachelor 1 :
Cus my girl’s at the crib. And… then what I would do is…
I’d get you the finest drink, of course it’s gonna have ice in it.
And I don’t mean frozen water… huh, ya know?!

Becky :
That’s so sweet.

Bachelor 1 :
And uh… what else would I do to really…
I’d take you to Rodeo Drive, of course. Of course.

Becky :
I love Rodeo.

Bachelor 1 :
Ima take you to Rodeo and show you all the beautiful stores
and what you could have if your record goes number one like mine haha.
That’s what I would do to… pretty impressive ain’t it?

Becky :
OK, sounds like fun.
Same question, handsome bachelor number two.

Bachelor 2 (U-God from Wu-tang?) :
Yo, to impwess you to take you out on a perfect womantic date,
My idea for that is… to pick you up in a Wu mobile, bwought to you by Cwysler.

Becky :
A Wu mobile?

Bachelor 2 :
You know, the cowabowation, that we just came wit.
And den, I take you upstate, to the amusement park, Wu-tang amusement parks.

Becky :
Ooh, I love parks!

Bachelor 2 :
Word, we wide all kinda wollercoasters and fewwis wheels.

Becky :
Mm, that’s my favorite!

Bachelor 2 :
Eat all kinda cotton candy, popcorn and shit.
And den, to welax you, or you know, give you a beauty treatment,
I’ll take you down to the Wu spa.
We got all the special manicuwists out there, you know, putting it down.

Becky :
Sounds good.

Bachelor 2 :
And to end all the night, you know, maybe we’ll have a womantic dinner.
Order out some Chinese food fwom Wu delivewy. We dewiwer 24 hours a day.
Word. Just call us on the tewephone, hit me, or…
Or you could hit me on the 2-way, or Bwackbwewwy account.

Becky :
Wow! That maybe difficult to top!
What would you do handsome bachelor number three?

Bachelor 3
(Rev. Don Magic Juan? Don King? no clue) :
Yeah, listen. Can you repeat that question again please?

Becky :
Oh, ok. You want me to repeat the question?
OK, on our first date, where would you take me and how would you try to impress me?

Bachelor 3 :
That is a very good question. Heh, you’re very charming.

Becky :
Thank you!

Bachelor 3 :
Well, on the first date with me is… is very exciting.
I would, of course, take you wherever you wanted to go.
If the plans was up to me, I would take you… to uh… to NASA.

Becky :
Lovely!

Bachelor 3 :
What we would do is we would take a trip up that elevator
And we would go and look at the stars, and I will pack us a picnic basket.

Becky :
Sweet

Bachelor 3 :
And I would have us all kinds of… alcohol beverages.
I would whip out… that’s right… I would whip out a diamond necklace.
Put it around you sweet, skinny neck.
And touch you in places that no doctor has ever discovered on you before.

Becky :
Wow

Bachelor 3 :
And then I would slowly caress your breasts
Work my way down to your… sweet lovin thighs, and then…

Talk show host :
OK, time’s up.
We’ll find out your answer, Becky, after this commercial break.

*** Thanx a lot to kenduckk for this one ***

Breakdown

I hope this old train breaks down
So I can take a walk around and
See there’s no time you see 'cause
Time is just a melody
But the people in the streets
Walkin’ fast as their feet can take ‘em
I just rode through town
And though this window’s got a view
But the frame I’m lookin’ through
Seems to have no concern for now so for now

I need this here
Old train to breakdown
Oh please just
Let me please breakdown
I need this here
Old train to breakdown

Well this engine screams out loud
Centipede gonna crawl westbound and
I don't even make a sound 'cause
It’s gonna sting me to leave this town
And the people in the streets
That I’ll never get to meet
If these tracks don't bend somehow
And I got no time
that I got to get to where I don’t need to be
Said...

I need this here
Old train to breakdown
Oh please just
Let me please breakdown
I need this here
Old train to breakdown
Let me please break down

You know you can't stop nothin’
If you got no control
Over the thoughts in your mind
That you kept and you know
That you don’t know nothin’
But you don’t need to know
’Cause all the wisdom’s in the trees
Not the glass windows

You can't stop wishin’ if you don’t let go / I need this here
Of the things that you find and you lose and you know / Old train to breakdown

But you keep on rolling put the moment on hold / Oh please just
But the frames too bright with the blinds down low / Let me please breakdown

You know you can't stop nothin’ / I need this here
If you got no control
Over the thoughts in your mind / Old train to breakdown
That you kept and you know

That you don’t know nothin’ / Oh please just
But you don’t need to know
’Cause all the wisdom’s in the trees / Let me please breakdown
Not the glass windows

You can't stop wishin’ if you don’t let go / I need this here
Of the things that you find and you lose and you know / Old train to breakdown

But you keep on rolling put the moment on hold / Oh please just
But the frames too bright with the blinds down low / Let me please breakdown

*** Thanx a lot to Susan for this one ***

It's Like That

Casual :

Hydro hydro microphone specialist x4

Alright it's getting really close to the election day
I'm voting please don't cut off my section eight
As soon as pastor pass the collection plate
I'm like shit I'm trying to stack for a escalade
But pay your ties times money
I divise wise cunning little plans
To withstand when cats drive by funny
Like I ain't got what he got I don't play that
Nigga we fade cats that don't fuck with j-cats
You're trying to act like a boss save it patna
The first and fifteenth you be be hittin up yo baby mama
And you know that money for the baby
No he ain't right at the stop light looking at me crazy
Seems like your get up and go done got up and left
You're trying to throw with dononan yo you gotta be def
'Cause I can flow like donovaon bro sound supersonic
Pouring gin and tonic with some chronic to blow

It's like that and-a you know
This is all original and that's how it goes
It's like that and-a you know
On the microphone
Here we go

It's like that and-a you know
This is all original and that's how it goes
It's like that and-a you know
Here we go

It go homeboy save the shit
He mad cause I gave the dick to his favorite chick
You know the flavor patna tried to savor quick but
That behavior really just made her sick hah
I put the o in only you put the ho in homey
I got a company now niggas steady flowin for me
Well buy my album and play it like your favorite movie
If not then don't say shit to me
Shit this independent dope we splurgin and
Boy I'm going to stay in the cut like sea urchins
Hah poetical progresive poppin it proper
Ask them cats I made a mess of rockin it
Yeah hiero aggressive operatives
Still got connects on them A1 ostriches
Not the type that will spoil my women
I just take'm to the crib so they can soil my linen

It's like that and-a you know
This is all original and that's how it goes
It's like that and-a you know
Here we go

It's like that and-a you know
This is all original and that's how it goes
It's like that and-a you know
Here we go

Been 'bout ten long years still come flawless
The lawless warrior William Wallace
Rappin' 'till I get a million dollars
Like home girl strippin still in college
Trying to get paper'd up
Please huh believe I help her breathe like vapo-rub
Rock the mic in your favorite club
Rock flavors like haters might step on the the gators right? shit...
From the bay to decatur the mic motivator hold a mic like yoda hold a saber
You know the flavor watch your behaviors
Cool I'm off to Handsome Boy Modelling School
And best believe I got a locker full of Vodka and Backwoods
I can play the doctor and start writing prescription
If you fighting addictions I'm right in the distance
My music enlightens who listens check it out

It's like that and-a you know
This is all original and that's how it goes
It's like that and-a you know
Here we go

It's like that and-a you know
This is all original and that's how it goes
It's like that and-a you know
Here we go

It's like that and-a you know
This is all original and that's how it goes
It's like that and-a you know
Here we go


Tim Meadows Speech :

The Handsome Boy Modeling School has given me confidence to show up for a date
when I say I'm going to be there... and... and to call two days later, to let
her know that I am okay, whether the date ended good or bad. Before I was so
incomplete and so... even though I was getting laid a lot, I was... I was not
happy. But now, I'm getting laid and I'm happy. So I am complete. Thank you,
Handsome Boy Modeling School.

*** Thanx a lot to Alsmola & Rudy for this one ***

I've been thinkin'

Cat Power :

Be my boy, be my boy
Be my boy, be my boy

Be my boy, be my boy
Be my boy, be my boy

I've been thinking about those things you said
I've been thinking about those things we did
I've been thinking about those things you do
I've been thinking about those things you made me do too

Be my boy, be my boy
Be my boy, be my boy

I was hypnotized
By your fairy eyes
Like a tiger in the dark
You were hungry from the start

Be my boy, be my boy
Be my boy, be my boy

Diamonds, candy pills
One million dollar bills
You can try
But you can't buy me, buy me

Diamonds, candy pills
One million dollar bills
You can try
But you can't buy me

You can slide slide
Slippity slide
Hip hop
And don't stop
I'll never be
On my knees

You can slide slide
Slippity slide
You can hip hop
And don't stop
'Cause I'll never be
On my knees

When I saw you on the street
I just had to look away
You were so sweet
Sexy Steez
Lay back relax
Street boy please
Wait a second it's gonna take awhile

Slide slide
Slippity slide
You can hip hop
And don't stop
I'll never be
On my knees

You can slide slide
Slippity slide
You can hip hop
And don't stop
I'll never be
On my knees

I've been thinking 'bout
Why you act so proud
I've been thinking 'bout
What's this shit about
Am I losin' control
Am I losin' my soul
Just tell me am I losin' you

Be my boy, be my boy
Be my boy, be my boy

Be my boy, be my boy
Be my boy, be my boy

Diamonds, candy pills
One million dollar bills
You can try
But you can't buy me

You can slide slide
Slippity slide
You can hip hop
And don't stop
'Cause I'll never be
On my knees

You can slide slide
Slippity slide
You can hip hop
And don't stop
'Cause I'll never be
On my knees

I've been thinking 'bout
I've been thinking about
I've been thinking 'bout
I've been thinking about
Losing you

*** Thanx a lot to Susan & Kyle for this one ***

Rock and Roll (Could Never Hip Hop Like This) Part 2

I am the original DJ Jazzy Jay
From the Mighty Mighty Zulu Nation
First I'll say my name is um
Original scratch creater Grand Wizard Theodore
For those who don't know, I started back out in '74.
Africa Bambata, Disco King Mario, Cool Herc, Grandmaster Flash
And you know, some of the pioneers who did it back then y'know

Hip hop is universal man, it all depends upon on what you do
Hip hop is like what you would call the bastard child of a lot of different forms of music
I just feel good that a lot of rock bands are like, are like recognizing y'know, the culture
We used to play these beats because they used to drive us on the dance floor
And people don't really know that it's a rock record until like the guitars come in and stuff like that
We didn't have no hip hop beats back in the days, we had to take it from everywhere we could get it from
Jus' trying to take it to another level
That's what keeps the music new and keeps it fresh
As far as y'know rock is concerned man, I think rock is, you know, a big part of hip hop man
Rock helped influence hip hop, hip hop helped influence the world

Shhh
Yeah
Hey
Shhh
You hear me?
Ok
Listen

Yo
It's like a triple stage darkness
Listen and drift
Every muscle in your skin
Starts to shake and shift
You can hate the gift
But my phrases daze ya
Click, spray ya face
When I spit
I mean it
Ya just too conceited
Repeating and repeating
Your a thug'd out gangsta'
PIMP 'til ya believe it
Seems like there's too much Pac
We don't need it
I'm cool on your heat
You can keep it
It's not a big secret
This is a game ya can't win
Ya singin' the same thing
But were bringin' the yin
So just close your eyes
And pretend again
That ya skin isn't as thin
As the skin ya in

Bitch

Give me a second
Just to spell it out
So
Nobody can twist
What I'm takin' about
I don't
Have to fake anything I feel
Because
We both know
Every word is real
So
Give me a second
Just to spell it out
So
Nobody can twist
What I'm takin' about
I don't
Have to fake anything I feel
Because
We both know
Every word is real

Right about now, the funk soul brother
Check it out now, the funk soul brother (Handsome boys!)
Right about now, the funk soul brother
Check it out now, the funk soul brother

I got the skills of titanium, straight to the cranium
Try to play me and we can go to war like Iranians
A D-pack, I speak rap, as long as the beat phat
My chain be off the meat rack
Lord finesse, don't harass the guards with four bars and piss on like half your squad
So the savage, I don't gain raps
I don't harass the people playing russian roulette with automatics
See, on the street I'm top the rank
Three words, when I get the dice, stop the bank
Bet against me, you'll get your cash
Leaving my street team, for nothing but ass whoopins
Hard hitters (Handsome Boys)
The type to sport the chicks on the arm like John Ritter
The bomb nigga, being stabbin' the third
Better play like Jehova witness, just spread the word, spread the word, spread the word

The sky opens wide
Swallowing again
Once I am inside
I'm lost and can't pretend
These pictures in my mind
Are not a part of me
These memories hold me tight
'Til I can hardly breathe
(Breathe, breathe, breathe, breathe, breathe)
I can hardly breathe
(Breathe, breathe, breathe, breathe, breathe)
I can hardly stop the memories

Nothing I can say or do will
Take away what I've been through
What you were is what I've come to be
Nothing you can say to me
Will take away these memories
What you were is what I've come to be

*** Thanx a lot to Daniel for this one ***

The hours

Chino Moreno :
Why don’t you come out
Just wasting hours to call
And say...
No we're not gonna die!
Thoughts evolve
Shall we kill
A lot say
Tell them lies it's hard play
And see my chest grow

For hours and hours and hours and safe for hours
The hours and hours and hours and hours...

Chino Moreno :
Go tell
Wasting hours to talk
And say
No we’re not gonna stop!
Thoughts evolve
Shall we kill
A lot say
Tell them lies it's hard play
And see my chest grow

For hours and hours and hours and safe for hours
The hours and hours and hours and hours...

El-p & Cage :
Don’t let them take you alive,
The city knows my name, number and address,
There's no where to hide.
You must all hear the merciful leader of big guns,
Watching gotti and television talk to your son.
At least this plane isn't corporated,
To a sickness that will not be infiltrated.
When you slip this, then you'll see it's automated
Weather the ? Will be inaugurated
And when tapped in the vein
Clapped back automatic a vein snap
But i just wanna boogie with a same plaque
Weather men will bring the beast out of a cheeky creek,
Some of these soldiers scream at the look of me (while i swing with an axe!),
Meditated, my medicated state of my rate,
I can't wait to shoot frank and loot the bank.
And uh, it's automated gang otta take out the gator
Pulling pranching on em' things and we breezing out of your brains some.

For hours and hours and hours and safe for hours
The hours and hours and hours and hours...

*** Thanx a lot to Kami for this one ***

Class System

Pharrel :
La la la la la la la

Julie Cruise :
Yes, I got it all
Prestige, class, fortune
Good help is so hard to find
Except my tennis pro
(My husband doesn't know)

Pharrel :

They're all trapped in the system
Unbeknownst to them they're trapped with no glass
Hello there

They're all trapped in the system
Unbeknownst to them they're trapped with no glass
Hello there

Julie Cruise :
I give to many charities
It's just a tax write off
They breed, just like rats it seems
Why don't they get a job


Pharrel :

They're all trapped in the system
Unbeknownst to them they're trapped with no glass
Hello there

They're all trapped in the system
Unbeknownst to them they're trapped with no glass
Hello there


Woman :

I mean really it's so simple for them
I mean we're the ones paying the rent
And the food and..all the taxes
My God what more do they want

Julie Cruise :
Money Money Money Money Money
Money Money Money Money Money
It makes the world go round

Pharrel :
They're all trapped in the system
Unbeknownst to them they're trapped with no glass
Hello there

They're all trapped in the system
Unbeknownst to them they're trapped with no glass
Hello there

They're all trapped in the system
Unbeknownst to them they're trapped with no glass
Hello there

They're all trapped in the system
Unbeknownst to them they're trapped with no glass
Hello there


Woman :
I was bred to be special
You're not one of us
So don't try to fit in
We'll just laugh you away

I get meloncholy sometimes
My shrink says im repressed
I'm just like my mother I guess
Same class, wealth...bland husband

*** Thanx a lot to Dave & Bart for this one ***

First...and Then

Shhh
See i wasn't even gonna do this shit
But i owe this muthafucka a favor
So i'm a do this shit
But you muthafuckas betta stay quiet

Open the door
Gotcha
Hopin' for more
Told ya before
Velvet
Smooth as velour
Step in the light
Black sheep
Reppin' it right
Never we hide
Too much ebony pride
Something to see
Scratch that, something to be
Payin' my dues
God knows, nothin' for free
Takin' it back
Paper
Makin' it stack
Counter attack
Dance floors, makin' em crack
Running the course-cocked back
Gun it with force
Rockin ' the spot
I got y'all, lovin the choice
Feelin' the flame
Black sheep
Killin' the pain
Spillin' the love
Sunshine
Feelin' the same
Settin' the tone
Black sheep
Let it be known
Cooler than ice
Hammin' it up
Keepin' it so
Makin' it knock all the way from the writer's block
Eatin' ox tails with cocktails holdin my cock

But first
Exhale with the XL
And then
Call your crew on your nextel
And then
Open up a beer and roll a L
And then party all night and rest well
But first
Exhale with the XL
And then
Everything you do you do it well
And then
Even if it hurts you never tell
And then
Everybody loves the clientel

I'm the type to not follow
Leave and drop throttle
Recline and pop bottles with designer top models
The type to not sweat it
Said it with hot head, my thing, got to get it
I move, like a phantom, I'm mister meddlesome
Destined to hit the top, Dres the kettledrum
Kennel one pedigree, the flow stank dingy
Share my point of view in a world waste din gee
I be the principal, it be invisible
There be no optical, above the pinnacle
More like I got a fuse, for when you got to choose
Who in a lot of crews, a million molecules
There won't be no debate, my skills are overweight
If you can't hold, you hate, I over compensate
It's Dres, D - R - E - S, the one that does it best
My styles illustrious, my moves are limitless

But first
Exhale with the XL
And then
Call your crew on your nextel
And then
Open up a beer and roll a L
And then party all night and rest well
But first
Exhale with the XL
And then
Everything you do you do it well
And then
Even if it hurts you never tell
And then
Everybody loves the clientel

Now it doesn't even matter if I do or if I don't have dough
It's like I'm walking on red carpet everywhere that I go
A renegade with rhymes rolling to the tune, low key
Opposite the velvet ropes where Heinekens flow free
And I'm known throughout the world for what I do with one bar
Slap a rapper even crack a nigga lower lumbar
Ain't gotta front for nada, it don't mean a thing
The only keys I got are the one's swinging on my key ring
Ain't gotta toss threads, throw rolls, and dress funny
Just gotta be Dres, stay black, and get money
Ain't gotta smoke weed, pop ex, or sniff blow
Just gotta be Dres, stay black, and get dough
So cool, they called me old school in the eighties
With ladies in their Mercedes at the foot of the good Fridays
On some handsome boy shit, telling how to trust me
'Till she's speaking in tongues, screaming out monk free

But first
Exhale with the XL
And then
Call your crew on your nextel
And then
Open up a beer and roll a L
And then party all night and rest well
But first
Exhale with the XL
And then
Everything you do you do it well
And then
Even if it hurts you never tell
And then
Everybody loves the clientel

*** Thanx a lot to Jocelyn for this one ***

A Day In The Life

( Feat.RZA & Mars Volta )

Aiyo, slipperly slurp slip, nigga, churped off, two sniffs of cocaine
This motherfucker broke the glass in my whip
Try'nna dip, on this twenty dollar bill I had on my dashboard
And police is asking me son, why I whoop his ass for
Save y'all two hours of paperwork, my neighbor lurk
Watchdog, chew ass out, son, and put in major work
We collect antique ammunitions, and plus
We got them big guns, you only see in science fictions
My Uncle Cuffie's the chief, but my little, knucklehead
Cousin Mar', yeah, son, is a thief
And we gave him a job, making three hundred a week
But he slipped on my piece, now he's back in the streets

How many times have you let your tongue go slip
From the grin in your teeth and the cracks of your lips
I never heard such nerve before
But your venom spills slowly through the cracks of my pores
Just to please you honey, just to please you honey
And how many times have you let your tongue go slip
From the grin in your teeth and the cracks of your lips

A.G. is King like Tutankhamen or Haile Selassie
Body the party, watchin' for niggaz tryin' to Pac me
Or Biggie Smalls me, come on, please
With these gemstars, I'm Jason Vorhees
A's loose, so much pain inflicted, remain addicted
Carry microphones, with the Passion of Je-sus
It's Flamboyant for life, nigga, throw those L's up
Ain't millionaires, by this year, then catch us in twelve months
Now who's fuckin' with Andre?
A beast on the east, love on the west, ask Kanye
Still Diggin' motherfucker, it's that plain and simple
G.D. til' my heart beat,discontinue
On the ave., til every soul in the ghetto is gone
Where niggaz sell more rock than heavy metal songs
Anything you want to know, then read E2K
Fuck with A, and get broke up like B2K, cuz..

How many times have you let your tongue go slip
From the grin in your teeth and the cracks of your lips
I never heard such nerve before
But your venom spills slowly through the cracks of my pores
Just to please you honey, just to please you honey
And how many times have you let your tongue go slip
From the grin in your teeth and the cracks of your lips

Aiyo, aiyo, cuz I'm the piece, the magnetic, I'm not the weak and pathetic
Sometimes, inside my rhymes, you hear words that perfected
Master your Hung Gar, five animal form kung fu
Thundar the Barbarian sword, being swung
Wu-Tang, invincible blade, thrust to parry
Up the Temple steps, much water got carried
In this industrious world, meet the illustrious
Uncombustional, give props like Doctor Huxtable
Knew many men, only trust a few
Women, love the few, mention Wu-Wear linen, rugged blue
God-U's, I tuck a few, known to smash out a club or two
And represent the worldwide W

How many times have you let your tongue go slip
From the grin in your teeth and the cracks of your lips
I never heard such nerve before
But your venom spills slowly through the cracks of my pores
Just to please you honey, just to please you honey
And how many times have you let your tongue go slip
From the grin in your teeth and the cracks of your lips

Oh, oh, your veins, may call, in sweat, for blood
Your veins, may call, in sweat, for blood
Your veins, may call, in sweat, for blood
Feed you the flesh of men, so you can see end again
Yeah, yeah...

*** Thanx a lot to Jasmine for this one ***

Greatest Mistake

Open up your eyes baby
Let the truth and sun shine in
One day, one day, one day you’ll understand
You’ll grow up and you’ll see
There’s a truth between friends and enemies

And I should have listened to my intuition of the way
When your moves and your moods were saying
They were sayin’ no more, no more, no more, no more
Can’t stick around until you take me down
And I’m alone and dealing
With the confusion that I’m feeling

I made the greatest mistake of my life
When I let you get away baby
And I, I made the greatest mistake
And still am, still am, still am

I can see clearly
That there’s no love lost between us
Misguided, lost child I pray, I pray for you
I hope that your lies can keep you warm

Oh if I, I could rewind the time
And keep those records playin’, playin’, playin'
I say play on, play on, play on, play on
About the love we never left behind
Forget about the broken hearted
We got to pick up where we started

I made the greatest mistake of my life
When I let you get away baby
And I, I made the greatest mistake
And still am, still am, still am

Wish I read the writing on the wall we made around us now baby
Mistakes can turn your world go round and build it up and tear it down baby

I made the greatest mistake of my life
When I let you get away baby
I made the greatest mistake of my life
Make the greatest mistake
And it’s still there, still there, still there

I made the greatest mistake of my life
I never should have let you get away baby
I made the greatest mistake of my life
Make the greatest mistake
And you’re the real thing, the real thing

Still am

I made the greatest mistake of my life
When I let you get away baby

*** Thanx a lot to Susan for this one ***

Outro

(Featuring Father Guido Sarducci)

Yeah but sometimes, you see, it’s not that easy, you know what I mean?
Not all the cupcakes and Jesus juice like you might assume.
Yeah a lot of times, I’ll admit it, it’s not easy being handsome
Being a model, being a graduate even of the Handsome Boy Modeling School.
Cause they… they pick on you, they make you… you know... say, “You gotta go on the runway.”
Then two minutes later, you have to change and go again.

And the restroom is full, yeah, but they, you know you have…
Can’t get into the restrooms then they say, “You walk so slow this time, you, steps, uh, too tiny.”
This what they say, “Tiny steps.”
Well yes, tiny steps, you eh walk with your legs crossed together tiny steps if you couldn’t get into the restroom!
What do you want, you know? I said, “Let me go in last."
If, for instance, there is some, eh, problem, you know, on the stage,
If… if there is… no… no one will slip on it, is what I’m saying, you know what I mean?
So let me go on last. They says, “No, you have to...
Mr. Zack has to go on last to take the big bow,” you know, like he did something
You know what I mean? He stole everybody else’s clothes designs.
What? He takes the bow, he slips, it’s not my fault, it…
It was so crowded they couldn’t get into the men’s room and I should get paid, it’s all I know.

Since I’ve graduated, I uh… I got to say uh… I will say nine out of ten jobs.
Just… just, you know, just marvelous, everybody so nice to you.
They.. they can’t treat you better but every once a while you run into, like, this jerk, you know, like Mr. Zack.
You know, and he slips on the runway and says it’s all my fault
When you can’t even get into the restroom cause there’s too many people lined up and they say, “You’re on the runway next.”

Yeah, sometimes it gets to be a little lonely, alone in the hotel room when you just waiting for a show to come up.
They, they pick you up at the airport and then they say,
“Just see you in the morning.” Then they don’t even make no plans for you to go some place.

And you gotta go there and there’s so many people.
They give you clothes, half the time they don’t even fit.
And then, it’s just all the jealousy cause, you know, if you’re handsome and that and other ones, they...
They treat you, you know, somehow like they jealous of you.
Just cause, you know, you’re a little more handsome then them.

And then they... they eat all of the food.
They eat, there’s no food left, you know.
They say, “Jesus juice.” Very funny. You know, they have the Jesus juice.
It’s a terrible wine. They just call it to make it glamorous or something.
And the food stinks. Usually, this… this junk, you know?
Even… even if you like to eat, you couldn’t eat it.

Then they said they gonna pick you up to take you back to the airport.
They don’t even show, they have… they… they… they… said, they, you know,
“The hotel’s got the van, you could go.” They said they would pick me up.
Why do I have the van? And they don’t reimburse you, like they say.
They say, “Well you ate so much.” You know, I don’t know.

I like to… and then the catalogs… they don’t even send it to you when you done with them.
You know, like who wants me anyway. What?
They say they gonna have a hair stylist there, there ain’t no hair stylist, you know?
One, maybe, yes, for what, 50 people, you know what I mean? “You gotta bring your own scissors too,” They say.
They have… they misplaced my scissors. What? Whoever heard of a hair stylist has no scissors?
They say, “We just style it, we don’t cut it.” What? In Italy, they have to cut, you know what I mean?
A barber is a what, a hair stylist, it means barber. No, what, you mean, no… cut?
My own mousse? What? Think I have my own mousse? I have no mousse.

Sometimes, like, if you… if you wet and then you socks get wet.
Then you have no other socks with you, you know what I mean?
Turn them inside out? No, doesn’t work. They say, “Change your socks,” they say.
Yes, the one for two dollar one? What? I have no, deh, in the hotel room.
It’s fifty miles from here out near the boondocks.
And they put you next to a place near Sears, I go to Sears for breakfast.

You know, once I was a model for socks.
And I thought, you know, this is a good, eh… modeling for socks… it’s good.
You don’t have to, you know eh… get all cleaned up the night before, you know.
That’s one good thing. You know, you could go unshaved and that.
Then they says, “Well, you can’t do shoes.” I say, “What?”
They say, “No, if you… if you did socks, then you can’t be model for shoes.
That’s the rules.” Who says this? Who makes these things up?
That if you’re a sock model, you can’t do shoes.
You have to… only the shoe models can do shoes. This is just makes me sick.

I just… I just turned down a job. They said they were looking for a handkerchief model.
 I say, “I could do it.” They says, “What, you left handed or right handed?” I says, “Right handed.”
They says, “No, you have to be left handed.” I said I could do it. They says, “No, you says you was right handed.”
I says, “I made a mistake. I’m left handed.” They says, “Prove it.” How am I gonna prove this, you know what I mean?
So I take my handkerchief off from my left hand, right? They said, “You didn’t do that very smooth.”
I say, “OK, lemme try again.” They say, “Why do you have to try again? You left handed, you do it.”
I said, “Just shut up and gimme the uh… the Kleenex. Let me show you with Kleenex.
I won’t ruin another one of my hankies.”
Anyway, I’m just… I don’t know what that did.

*** Thanx a lot to kenduckk for this one ***

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