This Mortal Coil Complete Lyrics Archive

B i o g r a p h y
(by Steve Huey)

The gothic dream pop collective This Mortal Coil was one of the most representative bands on the 4AD label, not least because they were run by 4AD president and co-founder Ivo Watts-Russell. Whether they played covers (of Watts-Russell's favorite artists) or originals, their material epitomized the haunting, ethereal sound that came to be associated with the label. Lush, swirling arrangements drenched in echo, reverb, and other effects were the project's stock-in-trade, often approaching ambient music. A rotating cast of vocalists and musicians supplied the sounds heard on record, all overseen by Watts-Russell and co-producer John Fryer. A studio entity only, the group started out as something of a 4AD all-star unit, but evolved into a way for Watts-Russell to collaborate with up-and-comers and other artists not signed to his label. Whoever was performing, the music was united by its gentle surges of melancholy and by Watts-Russell's highly influential aesthetic.Watts-Russell grew up in England's Northamptonshire area, more than an hour's drive north of London. In lieu of college, he worked in record stores, eventually hooking up with the Beggars Banquet retail chain, which had formed its own label. He and colleague Peter Kent co-founded 4AD in 1980 with financial support from Beggars Banquet, and initially signed post-punk acts like Modern English and the Birthday Party. Kent departed after a few years, and Watts-Russell took the label in a more atmospheric direction, making signature signings in Cocteau Twins and Dead Can Dance. The idea for This Mortal Coil germinated around that time; having been unsuccessful in convincing Modern English to record a covers medley that closed their concerts, Watts-Russell decided to do it himself. Gordon Sharp (of Cindytalk) and Lisa Gerrard (Dead Can Dance) supplied vocals on it and the intended B-side, a lovely cover of Tim Buckley's "Song to the Siren."From there the project snowballed, and Watts-Russell eventually assembled enough material for an album.

Released in 1984, It'll End in Tears featured musical efforts from 4AD staples like Robin Guthrie and Simon Raymonde (Cocteau Twins), Steven and Martyn Young (Colourbox), Brendan Perry (Dead Can Dance), and Mark Cox (Wolfgang Press), among others, with vocals from Gerrard, Sharp, Modern English's Robbie Grey, and Howard Devoto (Buzzcocks/Magazine). Watts-Russell and Fryer handled any additional instruments or programmed loops as needed. The track listing featured two songs from Big Star's Third/Sister Lovers, plus numbers by Roy Harper and Wire's Colin Newman, in addition to band originals. It'll End in Tears helped crystallize 4AD's emerging signature sound, and helped win a wider audience for their stable of artists.Fryer and Watts-Russell put together a follow-up album, Filigree & Shadow, which was released in 1986. A sprawling and more varied collection, Filigree & Shadow covered songs by Tim Buckley, Colin Newman, Talking Heads, Pearls Before Swine, Gene Clark, Judy Collins, and Van Morrison in between the original compositions. The Cocteau Twins' Simon Raymonde was still a significant presence, and string player/arranger Martin McCarrick took a bigger role this time around; Steven Young and Mark Cox both returned, and members of Dif Juz were also prominent. Most vocals were by Dominic Appleton (also of Breathless), Deirdre and Louise Rutkowski, and a pre-dance diva Alison Limerick.Much of the same core cast — Watts-Russell, Fryer, McCarrick, Appleton, Limerick, and the Rutkowskis — was on hand for the third and final This Mortal Coil album, the tighter Blood, issued in 1991. New guest vocalists included Caroline Crawley of Shelleyan Orphan, Kim Deal and Tanya Donelly of the Breeders, and Heidi Berry. Covers this time out included two by Big Star's Chris Bell, Rain Parade, Spirit, Syd Barrett, and Rodney Crowell, among others. Watts-Russell had announced that he would retire the This Mortal Coil name following Blood, and remained true to his word. In 1993, he issued a limited-edition CD box set, 1983-1991, which packaged all three of the group's albums, plus a bonus disc featuring original versions of many of their covers. In 1998, Watts-Russell formed a similar but somewhat sparser project dubbed the Hope Blister.

I first saw you
You had on blue jeans
Your eyes couldn't hide anything
I saw you breathing, oh
I saw you staring out in space
I next saw you
You was at the party
Thought you was a queen
Oh so flirty
I came against
Didn't say excuse
Knew what I was doing
We looked very fine
'Cause we were leaving
Like Saint Joan
Doing a cool jerk
Oh, I want you
Like a kangaroo

Long afloat on shipless oceans
I did all my best to smile
'Til your singing eyes and fingers
Drew me loving into your isle
And you sang
"Sail to me, sail to me, let me enfold you"
Here I am, here I am, waiting to hold you

Did I dream you dreamed about me
Were you here when I was full sail *
Now my foolish boat is leaning
Broken lovelorn on your rocks
For you sang
"Touch me not, touch me not, come back tomorrow"
Oh my heart, oh my heart shies from the sorrow

I'm as puzzled as a newborn child
I'm as riddled as the tide
Should I stand amid the breakers
Or should I lie with death my bride
Hear me sing
"Swim to me, swim to me, let me enfold you"
"Here I am. Here I am, waiting to hold you"

* In a live version she sings 'flotsam'

Holocaust

Your eyes are almost dead
Can't get out of bed
And you can't sleep
You're sitting down to dress
And you're a mess
You look in the mirror
You look in your eyes
Say you realize
Everybody goes
Leaving those who fall behind
Everybody goes
As far as they can
They don't just care
They stood on the stairs
Laughing at your errors
Your mother's dead
She said, "Don't be afraid"
Your mother's dead
You're on your own
She's in her bed
Everybody goes
Leaving those who fall behind
Everybody goes
As far as they can
They don't just care
You're a wasted face
You're a sad eyed lie
You're a holocaust

Fond affections

Fond affections are never said
They're only sung in songs
I never was naive enough to know when I was wrong
There's no light at the end of it all
Let's all sit down and cry
There's no light at the beginning
Let's all sit down and cry
Now it's time to say goodbye
Now it's being forced upon you
It's just that person by your side remaining distant
Now the winter's growing close
The days are getting older
I can tell by your face
That your heart is getting colder
There's no light at the end of it all
Let's all sit down and cry
There's no light at the beginning
Let's all sit down and cry

The kettle's on, the sun has gone, another day
She offers me, Tibetan tea, on a flower tray
She's at the door, she wants to score, she didn't means to say:
"I loved you a long time ago
Where the winds of forget-me-nots blow
But I just couldn't let myself go
Not knowing what on earth there is to know
How I wish that I had, 'cause I feel so sad
That I never had one of your children."
From across the room, inside a tomb, a chance is waxed and waned
The night is young, why are we so hung up in each other's chains?
I must take her, and I must make her, while the dove domains
And feel the juice run as she flies
Run my wings under her sighs
As the flames of eternity rise
To lick us with the first born lash of dawn
Oh really my dear, I can't see what we fear
Standing here with ourselves in between us
And at the door, we can't say more, than just another day
And without a sound, I turn around, and I walk away

*** Thanx a lot to Elise & Thomas who corrected this one ***

Waves Become Wings

Please, stay stay
Please stay stay
Stay a while
Mystery lights keep the dark inside
Evading glances when the light's applied
Stay and run unto me
Sail to me
Come to me

It may be as you say, I'll admit
But you don't sound convinced
Between the surface you and the surface me
You didn't touch me
It may be as well that
I didn't see the point
You didn't touch me
I suppose it's just hollow
No idea, no spark
But I thought that in order to survive you need to touch me
All of the me's

A Single Wish

You and I, alone here
You and I
It'll end in tears
.....
You know it'll end in tears
It'll end in tears

( Pearls Before Swine )

The jeweller has a shop on the corner of the boulevard
In the night, in small spectacles, he polishes old coins
He uses spit and cloth and ashes
He makes them shine with ashes
He knows the use of ashes
He worships God with ashes
The coins are often very old by the time they reach the jeweler
With his hands and ashes, he will try the best he can
He knows that he can only shine them, cannot repair the scratches
He knows that even new coins have scars, so he just smiles
He knows the use of ashes
He worships God with ashes
In the darkest of the night
Both his hands will blister badly
They will often open painfully and the blood flows from his hands
He works to take from black coin faces, the thumbprints from so many ages
He wishes he could cure the scars
When he forgets he sometimes cries
He knows the use of ashes
He worships God with ashes

Tarantula

( Colourbox )

I'm living but I'm feeling numb, can see it in my stare
I wear a mask so falsely numb, and I don't know who I am
Despite the worlds inside of me, thwarting me away
I've noticed in other eyes, time's closing in

But when the thunder breaks, it breaks for you and me
Tarantula, tarantula, tarantula, tarantula

The future's looking rather grim, strange black tide
Decisions lie with stupid men, alone with my life
That choking and the hype in me, expecting me to fall
But only if I'm threatened will the tables turn

But when the thunder breaks, it breaks for you and me
Tarantula, tarantula, tarantula, tarantula

My world's under a sentence of death, I was born underground
But when the pressure gets too much for me, I bite

My Father

( Judy Collins )

My father always promised me
That we would live in France
We'd go boating on the Seine
And I would learn to dance

We lived in Ohio then
He worked in the mines
On his dreams like boats
We knew we'd sail in time

My sisters all grew up and went away
To Denver and Cheyenne
Marrying their grown-up dreams
The lilacs and the man

I stand behind the young girl�s dream
Only danced alone
Hoping, hoping that my father�s dreams
Would someday take me home

I live in Paris now
My children dance and dream
Hearing the ways of a miner's life
In words they've never seen

I sail my memories of home
Like boats across the Seine
And watch my fathers eyes
Watching the setting sun
Set in my fathers eyes again

( Van Morrison )

Come here my love
This feeling has me spellbound
Yet the storyline, in paragraphs, laid down the same
In fathoms of my inner mind
I'm mystified, oh, by this mood
This melancholy feeling that just don't do no good

Come here my love
And I will lift my spirits high for you
I'd like to fly away and spend a day or two
Just contemplating the fields and leaves and talking about nothing
Just layin' down in shades of effervescent, effervescent odors
And shades of time and tide
And flowing through
Become enraptured by the sights and sounds,
In intrigue of nature and beauty

Come along with me
And take it all in
Come here my love

Strength Of Strings

( Gene Clark )

"Billy, Billy, we just had a baby"

In my life the piano sings
Brings me words that are not the strength of strings

Fiery rain and Ruby's cooling sun
Now I see that my world has only begun

Notes that roll on winds with swirling wings
Brings me words that are not the strength of strings

When I'm feeling high, or I'm feeling low, or there is no change
Somehow days keep melting into the night

And there's always high on the cosmic range
I am always high, I am always low, there is always change

Hear the strings are bending in harmony
Not so far from breaking on the cosmic range

Morning Glory

( Tim Buckley )

I lit my purest candle close to my
Window, hoping it would catch the eye
Of any vagabond who passed it by
And I waited in my fleeting house

Before he came I felt him drawing near
As he neared I felt the ancient fear
That he had come to wound my door and jeer
And I waited in my fleeting house

"Tell me stories," I called to the Hobo;
"Stories of cold," I smiled at the Hobo;
"Stories of old," I knelt to the Hobo;
And he stood before my fleeting house

"No," said the Hobo, "No more tales of time;
Don't ask me now to wash away the grime;
I can't come in 'cause it's too high a climb,"
And he walked away from my fleeting house

"Then you be damned!" I screamed to the Hobo;
"Leave me alone," I wept to the Hobo;
"Turn into stone," I knelt to the Hobo;
And he walked away from my fleeting house

I Want To Live

( Gary Ogan )

I've gathered all my lifetime memories of you
My lusty sentiments that made life seem true
I'm rather selfish and I mean to be unkind
And you can't imagine what it does to me inside

But where am I, I want to die
I want to live, I want to die

If I were someone I would like to be a fool
No one would know me, and I think that would be cool
I'd paint a picture of my life upon your wall
And use the colors that have made life seem small

But where am I, I want to die
I want to live, I want to die

But you've got a way of understanding me
And I just call it one of your mysteries
But you know you've got to stay close to me, close to me

But where am I, I want to die
But where am I, I want to die
I want to die, I want to give
I want to die, die die die die, die die die die

Fire Brothers

( Quicksilver Messenger Service )

In the valley where the moons and lovers play
Live two children who were born on Saturday
One was dark, one was fair
Fathered by the hawk, mothered by the mare
Stranger children you have never seen
Brothers of the forest and the sea
One was land, one was air
And they kept the fires burning there
In a golden vessel and silver vase
Kept them burning in the strange enchanted place
Kept them burning to the sky
For they knew someday the sun would die

I Must Have Been Blind

( Tim Buckley )

Here I am believin' words again
Here I am tryin' to find your love again
Here I am down on my knees again
Prayin' for a love that we used to know
Both of us know how hard it is to love and let it go
Both of us know how hard it is to go on living that way
When so few understand what it means to fall in love
And so few know how hard it is to live without it
Lord I must have been blind, oh, I must have been blind
Lord, I must have been blind

Ah, to hold something real, and not believe it
To live in her life, and never trust it
To give all you know and never feel it
To hold back each day until it dies away
Both of us know how hard it is to love and let it go
And both of us know how hard it is to go on living that way
When so few understand what it means to fall in love
And so few know how hard it is to live without it
Lord, I must have been blind, I must have been blind
Lord, I must have been blind, Yes, I must have been blind

Alone

( Colin Newman )

Alone, with too much generosity
A theatre mask of hostility attracts
Assaults occur, infrequently
And those who come, to conquer
Need strength
But damage accumulates
Still moving him to tears
Retained a sense of humor
Retain a sense of humor
Retain a sense of humor
Return the sense of humor
Retain a sense of humor

Drugs

( The Talking Heads )

And all I see is little dots
Some are smeared and some are spots
Feels like a murder but that's alright
Somebody said there's too much light
Pull down the shade and it's alright
It'll be over in a minute or two.
I'm charged up...Don't put me down
Don't feel like talking...Don't mess around
I feel mean...I feel O.K.
I'm charged up...Electricity
The boys are making a big mess
This makes the girls all start to laugh
I don't know what they're talking about
The boys are worried, the girls are shocked
They pick the sound and let it drop
Nobody know what they're talking about
I'm charged up...I'm kinda wooden
I'm barely moving...I study motion
I study myself...I fooled myself
I'm charged up...It's pretty intense.
I'm charged up...Don't put me down
Don't feel like talking...Don't mess around
I feel mean...I feel O.K.
I'm charged up...Electricity.

Day comes up sicker than a cat
Something's wrong that is that

Mr. Somewhere missing somewhere never did figure just how much

A boat from the river takes you out
'Cross the other side of town, to get out, to get out
You take the tide, any tide, any tide
like there isn't gonna be any tide

Mr. Somewhere missing somewhere never did figure just how much
Missing somewhere never did figure just how much

A world like tomorrow wears things out
It's hard enough to get what's yours for now
And the hardest words are spoken softly
Softly look, no hands upon

Mr. Somewhere missing somewhere never did figure just how much
Missing somewhere never did figure just how much

Now the milkman beats you to the door
That was once a home, home no more
Mr. Somewhere, missing somewhere couldn't get the calendar to stop
Missing somewhere, never did figure just how much
Missing somewhere, never will admit just how much

With Tomorrow

( Gene Clark )

It was more like a dream than reality
I must have thought it was a dream while you were here with me
When you were near I didn't think you would leave
When you were gone it was too much to believe

So with tomorrow, I will borrow
Another moment of joy and sorrow
And another dream, and another
With tomorrow

So with the sun there won't be time just to look behind
There will be reasons not exclusions for my place of mind
There was so much I was told, it was not real
So many things that I could not taste, but I could feel

So with tomorrow, I will borrow
Another moment of joy and sorrow
In another dream, and another
With tomorrow

You And Your Sister

( Chris Bell )

You say my love for you's not real
But you don't know how real it feels
All I want to do is to spend some time with you
So I can hold you, hold you

Your sister says that I'm no good
I'd reassure her if I could
All I want to do is to spend some time with you
So I can hold you, hold you

Friends fail every day
I want to hear you say
Your love won't be leaving
Your eyes aren't deceiving

Fears will soon fade away
Smile now, don't be afraid
All I want to do is to spend some time with you
So I can hold you, hold you

So let me whisper in your ear
Don't you worry they can't hear
All I want to do is to spend some time with you
So I can hold you, hold you

( Spirit )

You know what we never did
We never danced

It's nature's way of telling you something's wrong
It's nature's way of telling you in a song
It's nature's way of receiving you
It's nature's way of retrieving you
It's nature's way of telling you something's wrong

It's nature's way of telling you through the breeze
It's nature's way of telling you dying trees
It's nature's way of receiving you
It's nature's way of retrieving you
It's nature's way of telling you something's wrong

It's nature's way
It's nature's way
It's nature's way of telling you something's wrong
It's nature's way of telling you in a song
[oh-oh-woah]
It's nature's way of receiving you
It's nature's way of retrieving you
It's nature's way of telling you something's wrong

I Come And Stand At Every Door

( Hikmet/Waters )

I come and stand at every door
But no-one hears my silent dread
I knock and yet remain unseen
For I am dead, for I am dead

I'm only seven although I've died
In Hiroshima long ago
I'm seven now as I was then
When children die they do not grow

My hair was scorched by swirling flame
My eyes grew dim, my eyes grew blind
Death came and turned my bones to dust
And that was scattered by the wind

I need no fruit, I need no rice
I need no sweet, nor even bread
I ask for nothing for myself
For I am dead, for I am dead

All that I ask is that for peace
You fight today, you fight today
So that the children of this world
May live and grow, and laugh and play

The half-moon is aching, bitter and sad
We are wet, we are stripped to the bone
It's out of our hands
The dream we're bound to dream
We are wet, always alone

How many ways can you say goodbye
That was nothing
Just a little something
How many days we're in dreaming
In many ways just a lie
In better days I'd be dreaming
As my life passed me by, by
Now pardon me for trying
Trying to tear apart
And pardon me for lying
It's just easy, so easy, to start

( P. Nooten/M. Brook )

Several times I looked in your eyes
Several times I saw you wishing to stop this
Ways much longer than, than we could see before
We started to walk, well actually we tried to go forward and...
Several times I looked in your eyes
Several times I saw you wishing to stop this

Late Night

( S. Barrett )

When I woke up today
And you weren't there to play
Then I wanted to be with you
When you showed me your eyes
Whispered love at the skies
Then I wanted to stay with you

Inside me I feel, alone and unreal
And the way you kiss will always be
A very special thing to me

When I lay still at night
Seeing stars high and light
Then I wanted to be with you
When the rooftops shone dark
All alone saw a spark
Spark of love just to stay with you

Inside me I feel, alone and unreal
And the way you kiss will always be
A very special thing to me

If I mention your name
Turn around on a chain
Then the sky opens up for you
When we grew very tall
When I saw you so small
Then I wanted to stay with you

Inside me I feel, alone and unreal
And the way you kiss will always be
A very special thing to me

Inside me I feel, alone and unreal
And the way you kiss will always be
A very special thing to me

( Mary Margret O'Hara )

I don't know how to tell you that you're all alone
Do what you will do not go home
You'll have to be with your won kind
I'll have to stay with my own kind
Help me lift you up
Help me lift you up

Sorry if I can't stop pretending
So sorry if I don't let you go
Like this, but not like this is ending
I think you know, I think you know
Help me lift you up
Help me lift you up

I have a dream, it's very clear
You're all around, but never near
Help me lift you up
Help me lift you up

Carolyn's Song

( Rain Parade )

I heard that you said that you feel all alone
Do you think that they could understand
When they told you go ahead

Is it in your head are you upside down
You drive around feeling sad

And I wish you everything I ever said
Do you understand, are you feeling dead
Are you lost, are you sad
Did I leave you alone
Do you think that I don't understand
What it's like to feel all alone

D. D. And E.

( Watts-Russell/Fryer )

Daylight, dreams, and echo
Daylight, dreams, and echo
Daylight, dreams, and echo

( Emmylou Harris )

Just like the sun over the mountain top
You know I'll always come again
You know I love to spend my morning times
Like sunlight dancing on your skin

What you see is what I've been
There is nothing I could hide from you
You see me better than I can
Out on the roads that lies before me now
There are some turns where I will spin
I only hope that you can hold me now
'Til I can gain control again

Like a lighthouse you must stand alone
And mark a sailor's journey's end
Nno matter what seas I have been sailing on
I'll always row this way again

Out on the roads that lie before me now
There are some turns where I will spin
I only hope that you can hold me now
'til I can gain control again

I only hope that you can hold me now
'Til I can gain control again

Dreams Are Like Water

( Watts-Russell/Fryer )

The air was blue, you could hold it in your hand, blue
Remember me, I once told you and I tried to
(so) Sad to realise that nothing lasts forever
Golden heart, you'll always be a child

We cried as we kissed - it was too new
We died and we lived - it was too new
Too strong still too much

When you were a child unhappiness took the place of dreams
Dreams are like water, colourless and dangerous
Without the strength to love, way beyond fear
You could care less if you could care at all

We cried as we kissed, it was too new
We died and we lived, it was too new
Too strong still too much

( Chris Bell )

Every night I tell myself "I am the cosmos
I am the wind"
But that don't bring you back again
Just when I was starting to feel okay
You're on the phone
I never wanna be alone
Never wanna be alone
I hate to have to take you home
Want you too much to say no, no

Yeah, yeah, yeah
Yeah, yeah, yeah

Never wanna be alone
I hate to have to take you home
Want you too bad to say no, no

Yeah, yeah, yeah
Yeah, yeah, yeah

My feelings always happening something organized
I can't confide
Don't know what's going on inside
So every night I tell myself "I am the cosmos
I am the wind"
But that don't bring you back again
I'd really like to see you again
I really want to see you again
I'd really like to see you again
[that don't bring you back again]
I really want to see you again
I'd really like to see you again
I really want to see you again
I'd really like to see you again
[that don't bring you back again]
I'd really like to see you again
I know I'd like to see you again
I never want to see you again

Nothing Like Blood

( Watts-Russell/Fryer )

Should have been enough to change your mind
Could have been enough to take my breath away
Should have been enough to change your mind
Could have been enough to take my breath away
Oooh, amazing bird hide, too shy
Should have been enough to change your mind
Could have been enough to take my breath away
Should have been enough to change your mind
Could have been enough to take my breath away
Oooh, amazing bird hide, too shy
Should have been enough to change your mind
Could have been enough to take your breath away
Should have been enough to change your mind
Could have been enough to take your breath away
Oooh, amazing bird hide, too shy
No matter how you try
No matter how many times it takes
No matter how you try
No matter how many times it takes
???
The light it start to sing
Goodnight
The air was blue you could hold it in your hand blue
It's now or never
Mind's eyes they start to grow
The half moon is aching
The light it start to sing
The air was blue you could hold it in your hand blue

The half-moon is aching, bitter and sad.
We are wet. we are stripped to the bone.
It's out of our hands, the dream we're bound to dream.
We are wet, always alone